“I don’t know. You tell me.”
She glared at him, but he didn’t move. In frustration she pulled up one sleeve of her shirt. Her arm, once mostly clear of the infection that was apparent elsewhere, was a mass of scaly patches, rough and gray-hued. She thrust it at him as if by doing so he might change his mind about staying, but he refused to move.
“So?” he said.
She dropped her sleeve over her arm. “So, Panther, it’s happening all over my body. Just like that, it started up again. I thought it had stopped. I thought that it might be in remission. No such luck. It‘s come back, and it’s changing me faster than it did earlier. You know what that means, don’t you? You and your street smarts, your vast knowledge of Freaks.”
He almost said something sharp in return, especially when she used the word Freaks as if it were an accusation. But he held his tongue and nodded. “Guess I had that coming. But it doesn’t change things.”
She laughed, bitter and sharp. “Of course it changes things. It changes everything! Within weeks, maybe less, I’ll be one of them. One of the Freaks! I’ll be a Lizard, and when that happens no one who’s still human is going to want to have anything to do with me! Especially you!” She was shaking with rage. “So don’t pretend that what’s happening doesn’t change things! You know it does! I’ve seen what it does, over and over while living with the Senator. If you aren’t human, you aren’t fit to be with humans! That’s just the way it is with people.”
She snatched up Rabbit, turned, and stalked away, but he quickly caught up. “Maybe where you used to live, people was like that. Ain’t so with the Ghosts. You can tell yourself it’s no different, but that don’t make it so. You know that.”
She shook her head. “Where do you come up with this stuff, Panther? You think nothing will change when I’m all scales and Lizard looks? Think again. The Ghosts will quit on me, quick as that. So will you. You might not think so now, but you will. You have to accept that. I’m a Lizard!”
He grabbed her by the shoulders and wheeled her about to face him. “You might be a Lizard on the outside, but you’re still who you always was on the inside. You’re the bravest girl I ever knew, even including Sparrow. You’re smart and strong and ain’t afraid of nuthin’ ’cept things you make up to be afraid about. But you ain’t making me one of them, you hear me? I didn’t come all this way to be told I don’t know how I feel about you. I came because I made up my mind on that subject a long time ago.”
“That right? You made up your mind how you feel about me?” She brushed him aside and began walking again. “What a load.”
“I came to bring you back to your family!” he shouted in rage. “You left your family, Cat! You know that? You walked out on them! They didn’t walk out on you. You walked out on them!”
She didn’t answer, just kept walking. So he kept walking with her, waiting to see how long it would take for her to speak to him again. It took a long time, and when she did, all she said was, “Go home.”
“Can’t do that.”
“Sure you can. Go home.”
“Nope. I’m staying.”
They walked on until it was dark, and neither said another word. Finally, Cat turned into a copse of graying fir and made a place for herself to sit and eat her supper. Panther joined her, pulling out food and water of his own. Rabbit curled up at their feet and began to purr. Cheney lay down nearby and closed his eyes.
The meal was consumed without conversation. Afterward, the pair sat across from each other and exchanged surreptitious glances while the night air grew chilly, the darkness deepened, and the stars came out by the thousands, sprinkling the blackness with bright bits of silvery light. The moon rose above the eastern horizon, orange initially and then white. Be the same moon back at the caravan, Panther thought, and wondered if anyone was missing him yet.
They unrolled blankets and wrapped themselves up, still sitting across from each other, still not speaking. The minutes slipped away, and Panther felt his eyes growing heavy. Maybe her plan was to wait him out, let him fall asleep, and then slip away. Well, it wouldn’t work. He wouldn’t sleep until she did. Even if he had to stay up all night, he wouldn’t sleep. Besides, it didn’t matter if he did. Cheney would just track her down again if she tried to lose him.
But her stubbornness was frustrating. It made him wonder anew what he was doing out here. If she didn’t want to come back, why was he going to all this trouble to change her mind? Oh, sure, he liked her. He thought she was special, all right. But what was he planning to do if he couldn’t get her to go back? Tell her good luck and give it up? Stick it out? For how long? Days? How long could he afford to stay out here?
“You are so stubborn!” she said suddenly.