I watch her sleep—so beautiful, so fucking perfect. She isn’t in my plans, and, yet, I find my entire world wrapping around her more each day. It’s dangerous, and I lost control of him. She wants more than I can give her, and a better man would let her go. I’m not a better man. I’m also not above cheating to keep her. It is how we are. We take out what gets in our way. We kill to prove we can control what we want. She’s still thinking as a human. If she wasn’t, she’d know that by me getting him out of the way I was proving to her that I was the smarter Fae, the better man. That I was the man for her, and willing to fight to get her.
He growls inside of me; pacing, watching, and stalking her, even now. He wants to be inside of her, but I’m afraid of what he might do to her. He took over so quickly, and I was unable to stop him, or protect her. I fought with him and regained control. Normally, I am aware when I allow him to take control. This time, he completely blocked me from seeing what he did until I was able to wrestle control back from him. All he will tell me is that he made sure that she would not need to feed from another while she sorts her mind—so we can give her the time she wants. Asshole, he still thinks he can control her. He seems confident that she will forgive me, but I’m not so sure that forgiveness will come anytime soon. I’m still not sure what else he has done to her. It scares me to think about what he might have done, and nothing scares me.
I could keep her; tie her up and fuck her as I desire. But she’s Syn, and I love her fight—her inner strength is undeniable. Her lust is addictive and, bloody hell, even lying beside her while holding the nightmares at bay is driving me into a stiff state of need. My cock presses against her, demanding to sink into her sweet honey until I’m balls deep in it.
My hands splay over her nipples, just to watch the sweet tips grow hard with the need for my mouth to devour them. I’m such a fucking prick. I couldn’t stop the need to be around her, to control her need. The first night I’d seen her had been a shock to my system. Nothing has ever drawn me in as her electric eyes did that night, and the pain I saw inside of them. The same pain that made her fight hard, and love even harder.
She’d been with him when I had first laid eyes upon her. Her eyes had been on him as she watched him fill his lust for power, but she’d been blind to it because of her love for him. Fucking kids; they’d been in love. She’d been staring at him as if he was the most amazing thing she’d ever seen. I wanted her to look at me like that. The way she’d smiled at him, with no fear hidden behind her luscious eyes. Her mouth smiled, so beautifully that it made my cock respond. He wanted power, and he had it right fucking in front of him. She had been his anchor, his power. He’d wanted more, and she’d never caught the look of dissatisfaction that shined from behind his mask. She’d been blind to it, happy in her assumption that he was happy as well. He wanted her power, and, eventually, had I let it, it would have consumed their relationship. Jealousy is a bitch.
I watched her pleasure herself, and nothing had ever made my cock harder than the sight of her legs spread open wide as her small hand worked herself over. Those sweet fucking noises she made had sealed her fate. They haunted me when I’d left her, right until I sifted back in the next day in hopes that she’d do it again. Eventually, I helped her feel the need to; pushing Fae aphrodisiacs into the air, just to watch her until she fell asleep, sated from her own hand. Like some fucking low ass pervert, I’d watched, her, unable to leave. I had never wanted a human. I’d stuck to a strict code to never meddle with them, until her.
I’d actually given in and kissed her once, and she woke up. She doesn’t remember it. I erased it from her mind. A fucking kiss! I’m a monster, and the one thing I had to have from her was a taste of those red fucking lips against my own. She’d awoken confused, disoriented as to who I was. I almost made love to her and allowed her to think I was a dream. But I couldn’t. I wanted her to scream my name when I fucked her tight folds. Needed it, like I needed fucking air.
I couldn’t take from her what countless others beg to give me. I can’t even think of fucking anyone else, without the sweetest pair of electric blue and lilac eyes popping into my mind. She’s in my dreams when I sleep, sweet and saucy, begging to be bent over and fed greedily. And I do fuck her in my dreams. Every. Fucking. Time.
I tried to let her go. I let her leave Faery, leave me. I sent guards to watch over her in disguise and keep her safe. I spent the entire time struggling against the beast for control, and when I slept, I would visit her in our dreams. Zahruk had brought women in, stripped them naked and took them in front of me like we used to do a million times before. The men even brought in a new one to fuck as a group. Eventually they gave up. Where it used to excite me, seeing women screaming to be filled, the only scream I wanted to hear wasn’t even in the same fucking world as I was.