Rexi looked like she was in the final death throes on the floor. “Horndog takes on a whole new meaning.”
Even I couldn’t hold back a chuckle. “It’s no big deal, I promise. And we can figure out the whole kiss thing as soon as we fix the rules. So let’s figure out how we’re going to do that.” Then I noticed that my hand was on his bare chest. My face heated again. “But first maybe we can find something for you to wear.”
Hydra tossed Kato some clothes. “Dese belonged to me fourt husband. Mebe dey be fittin’ ya.”
I turned around but noticed both Rexi and Hydra were still watching. Grabbing them by the hand, I hauled them outside. “We’ll just step out for a sec and give you some privacy.” I closed the door and hit my head against it.
Rexi pouted next to me. “Come on. Aren’t you just the least—”
“No!”
“I tink we’s bess go back inside.”
I groaned and trudged myself around. “Not you too, Hy—”
Something was stepping out of the water. They were short, blue-gray, muscled guys with hammer heads. I didn’t need to wonder if they were friendly or not, because the wizard was leading them from his flying balloon.
“The Rule of Duty: Always ask someone else to do, so you won’t have to do for yourself.”
—Thomason’s Tips to Ruthless Ruling
30
Head in the Clouds
“We’ve got company,” I said breathlessly, rushing inside and slamming the door.
Kato was in the middle of buttoning his shirt. “What do you mean?” He ran over and took a peek out the door—then slammed it shut, quickly putting his weight against it. “That doesn’t look good.”
“Is there a back door or a secret exit or something?” I asked Hydra.
“No in so muny wordins,” she replied.
Someone pounded on the door. “Ozma. I know you’re in there. Just hand over my princess and I’ll leave you alone.”
Hydra leaned her mouth near the door crack. “Sorry, wrong numba. Der be no Ozma here.”
“I don’t care what you’re calling yourself now. Just do yourself a favor and stay out of it like you have the last two hundred years.”
I really hoped she didn’t hand us over, but you don’t get to be that old by taking risks for near strangers. She didn’t owe us anything.
Hydra pursed her lips and seemed to think over his proposal, then shook her head—the opossums swinging wildly. “No tanks, dat would be borin’.”
I wanted to cheer, but the door pounded against my back.
“Let. Me. In.”
“Not by da hairs of me chinny chin chin.”
“Then I’ll huff.” The voice behind the door started changing. “And I’ll puff.” Getting rougher and gravelly. “And I’ll blow your house in.” When the wizard—no, Mimicman finished, I can only imagine that his body had shape-shifted to match his voice. There was a big bad wolf outside our door.
I took a deep breath and called the flames to my hands. It wasn’t hard to summon hatred for that man. He’d tried to use and manipulate me. And Grimm knows what his plans were for after the marriage. My body shuddered, and my hair flared bright in anger.
Hydra put her hand to my heart. “No child. Dat is not da way. Using it will only feed da hunger inside until da madness gobble ya whole.”
The power gnawed inside right now, trying to claw its way to the surface. The wind and something worse howled outside. “I don’t think we have a better option. Can you freeze them all, Kato?”
He thought about it for a moment. “Not with my normal powers. Maybe if I used my life magic.”
“No,” Hydra said. “Between da two beasties, I’s not sure you be winnin’.”
I really didn’t like that idea either. He was burning through those way too fast, and our enemies just kept growing in numbers.
Rexi ransacked Hydra’s hut, pulling boxes and jars off the shelves, opening drawers and looking under the counters. “Where is it?”
I couldn’t help but notice she hadn’t frozen up with fear like she did any time Griz was around. Maybe that’s because she had a trick up her sleeve—or under Hydra’s cauldron or something. “Where’s what? Do you have a huntsman stashed somewhere in here?”
The howling outside increased, and there was the sound of knocking coming from the walls—probably the hammerheads looking to do a little home remodeling.
Rexi yelled at Hydra over the din. “Where does it go? The black hole, wormhole, or rabbit hole that your houses keep disappearing into? Can’t we just escape through that?”
“That’s brilliant, Rexi!” I cried.
Hydra shook her head. “It only opens when I be puttin’ on a new head.”
Kato’s back bucked against the banging of the door. “So switch already.”
“I neber doned it while inside. Even with a transmigra-mogr-whosa, we’s might be gettin’ squished.”
Rexi grabbed a random head off the shelf. “I think the house is comin’ down either way.”
“Okay. Donna be sayin’ I dinna warn ya.”