All these years I’ve been lost, wondering if Wes’s death was that void in my life. He was a brother, and I have so many stories to tell you about him that you’ve never heard. I’ve only cried twice in my adult life. The first time was the night the trooper showed up at your house, breaking the news when they found his body. Your mother’s scream still haunts me to this day. The second time was when you ran after my car outside Dairy Queen, leaving who I thought was your daughter sitting at the table. Now that I’m home, I know what I’ve been missing for the last seven years.
All this time, I was missing you.
Wes brought you into my life, and I strongly believe that was his purpose.
I’ve watched you grow into a devoted woman who puts her family first. Be my best friend, Lexi.
(Here’s the part where I get mushy)
You turn me on, and I don’t mean just physically. You turn on my mind and my heart. I love the animated way you tell a good story, how the sunlight looks in your hair, watching you sleep next to me, and I’m even crazy about that silly laugh of yours. I know when you’re upset because you drum your fingers, and yet I still feel like I don’t know everything about you. Your eyes soften when you look at me, and I sometimes wonder if it means what I think it does. You’ve carried a heavy burden taking care of your family, making you the strongest woman I know, and I’d like to take away some of that burden. You are the memories of my past, and I want you to become the memories of my future.
I love you.
I’ve loved you for so damn long that it kills me to think about the time we’ve lost since I left you all those years ago, and for that, I’m sorry. You needed me, and I wasn’t there for you. But I promise to be here for as long as you’ll let me, and I hope that’s forever. Maybe I can bribe you with this candy to love me back, even just a little bit. I wish I was more of a poet, but hope that after tonight, we can start over again.
Together.
Yours always,
Austin
I wiped the tears from my cheeks and covered my mouth, allowing sorrow and joy to consume me like a storm. Austin had written this letter with the intention of confessing his love on the night Beckett had attacked me. He didn’t just show up at my door with candy, but he showed up with his heart on his sleeve.
Beside the bottle was a CD with a yellow sticky note attached.
Put this in the CD player, it said. I peeled the note away and handwritten on the label was:
Austin and Lexi
I turned the car key halfway and glanced up. His hands were deep in his pockets and he was staring at the ground, kicking up a few plumes of dirt. I slid the disc into the player and suddenly a haunting acoustic melody filled the car, playing the strings of my heart. The same song that was playing at the lake the night Austin fell in love with me.
“Landslide,” by Fleetwood Mac.
Our song.
I jumped out of the car and ran straight into his arms. Austin swung me around once and delivered a kiss to go down as one of the great ones in my life. His right hand curved around the nape of my neck, and the other tenderly stroked my cheek. He wiped away a stray tear on my chin and smiled with his eyes. The song filled the air like a warm breath of life.
“Never let me go again,” I whispered.
“Turn around, Ladybug, or you’ll miss it.” Austin wrapped his strong arms around me from behind and we faced the setting sun. Ripples of melon, rose, and daffodil filled the sky like glowing embers dying out.
“See that down there?” he asked, pointing his finger at a silver object.
In a clearing between the trees, I spied a familiar sight. “What is that? Wait a minute… is that my car?”
And then it exploded.
I shook from the thunderous detonation and gripped his arms. A fireball rose in the air with a billowing cloud of black smoke not far behind. My heart sped up and I stood still, watching the broken pieces of my past burn as Austin held me tight.
Forget flowers and candy. Austin blowing up my car was the most romantic thing any man had ever done for me.
I spun around on my heel. “You just blew up my car.”
Austin smiled and kissed my nose. “Feel like going for a ride?” He reached in his back pockets and pulled out his fringed, fingerless gloves, stretching his hands in them slowly as he swaggered back to the Challenger.
As if on cue, the music blaring on the speakers switched to the Kings of Leon song Austin had sung during our first time.
Yeah, I got the tingles.
Austin stopped in front of his classic Dodge Challenger, stripped out of his T-shirt, and seductively leaned against the hood on his elbow. A sly grin crossed his expression and he winked, gently patting the hood of the car with his left hand.
Damn, that lean.