“Man, I know you two were close, maybe because Wraith and I left you out, what with the weird mind connection. I don’t know.” Shade clapped a big hand down on Eidolon’s shoulder and shook his head ruefully. “I’m sorry about Roag. Sorry for you. But I was never able to grieve his loss.”
Eidolon frowned. He and Roag had been close, but not in the way Wraith and Shade were. Even now, as he looked at his brother who, with his long hair, looked more like Wraith than Eidolon, he could feel the wall between them. A wall that had never existed between Wraith and Shade. Those two were open about everything—the phrase “too much information,” wasn’t in their vocabulary. But Eidolon’s more reserved nature had paired well with Roag’s secretive disposition. Secretive and . . . cruel. Eidolon swayed, thankful for Shade’s bracing hold. Gods, but he’d overlooked so much . . .
“Where have you been?” Shade snarled to Roag, as Eidolon lowered Wraith’s shattered body from the ceiling, the chains that held him clanging.
Roag sauntered across the abandoned brewery, kicking through the piles of vampire dust, looking calmly at the two left alive, cuffed to each other in a puddle of their own blood. “You two handled things well enough.” He jerked his chin at Wraith. “Looks like you found our long-lost little brother. Not much left. Leave him. We’ll go find the whore I just balled.”
Shade and Eidolon had known Roag for ten years before they’d found Wraith, twenty-two years old and nearly dead, but never had they seen the ice-cold side of him until that day. It had only grown worse after that, Roag’s strange jealousy of Wraith causing a rift between all of them. Eidolon had played peacemaker for decades, until Roag went through his s’genesis ten years ago.
Roag had not come out of The Change well. He’d gone mad, had been unable to control his powers and urges. Shade was right; if Roag hadn’t died when he did, he’d either have been killed by other demons, or the Seminus Council would have eventually brought him to heel, and as the next-eldest sibling, Eidolon would have been required to carry out the punishment.
“Shit.” Eidolon sank into a chair and buried his face in his hands. “I need to talk to Tayla.”
“Has she agreed to bond with you?”
Eidolon looked up. “She doesn’t want me.”
Shade crossed his arms over his chest and braced one hip on the patio railing. “She’s a fool.”
“I can’t blame her. She thinks I want her because she’s my last resort.”
“Is she right?”
He swore, frustration and conflicting emotions churning in his mind. “I don’t know.”
“What is it about her that has you all wound up?”
A dull ache pounded in his chest. “She’s brave. Strong. What she’s lived through.” He shook his head, amazed at her resiliency. “She does everything with so much passion, something I’ve never had. For anything—until her.” He rubbed his breastbone as though he could relieve the empty sensation inside. “Fuck me, I love her.”
“Well, I’d say you have your answer. She’s not a last resort.”
“She’ll never believe that, and I don’t have time to prove it.” He locked gazes with his brother. “I can feel The Change, Shade. I’m not going to make it through another night.”
A pained light came into Shade’s eyes. “Maybe—”
“Don’t. I’ve already had a taste of how it’s going to be, and who I am now is not who I’ll be afterward. But I need some favors.”
“Anything.” Shade’s voice trembled.
“I want Tayla cared for. She’s to have full access to my bank accounts, and I want her set up in an apartment of her own.”
“Done. What else?”
“I need you to give her a once-over as soon as possible.”
Shade’s brow furrowed. “For what? Oh. Oh, man, you think you knocked her up?”
“You’ve been taking tact lessons from Wraith again, haven’t you?” Eidolon muttered. “I doubt she carries my offspring, but if she does, she’ll need to understand that going through with the integration is the only thing that will save them both.”
Shade shook his head. “I can’t do the procedure without you.”
“I’ve been thinking about that. I believe you can. You’ll need Gem, though. Using your gift and her blood, you’ve got a shot. If you don’t do it, she’ll die anyway. One more thing.” He took a deep breath and spat it out. “If I turn out like Roag—”
“You won’t,” Shade croaked. “You won’t.”
“Put me down.”
“E . . .”
“Promise me, Shade. I don’t want to live like that. You have to promise me.”
Swallowing over and over, Shade nodded. Then he turned on his heel and headed inside. Eidolon followed. “What are you doing?”
Shade drew to a halt in the middle of his living room, head bowed. Something plopped to the floor at his feet. A tear. “I’m calling Wraith,” he said, his voice shot to hell. “We’re all gonna do the brother thing today, ’kay?”