Nobody's Princess

“It’s where I’d go, if I could.” He twirled the strip of bark idly between his fingers. “When I used to sneak away from the palace in order to bring things to the lady Atalanta, she’d thank me with tales about her travels, her exploits, all the places she’d seen. I’d repeat those stories to myself all the way back to the citadel gates, pretending I was the one who’d done those deeds and seen those sights. She talked about you too. Whenever she finished telling one of her stories, she’d always say, ‘I wish Helen could have been there with me. She’d have enjoyed it! That girl’s as hungry for adventure as I am.’”

“She said that about me?” I leaned toward him, eager to hear more.

Milo nodded. “She said that until she met you, she thought she was the only woman alive who’d ever wanted something more than a husband, a family, and a hearth fire. Was she wrong?”

I shook my head. “I hate it that my brothers are sending me home like a bundle of old clothes. I’ve had the same training from the same weapons master they did, even if they had a few extra years of lessons. I know how to handle a sword, how to use a bow, how to hunt and ride. I never used a boar spear before we went to Calydon, but I learned how. I should be on the road to Iolkos with them!”

“Yes, you should,” Milo said in his sensible, soft-spoken way. “Lady Helen, I know what you did on the boar hunt. You were wonderful. But if you went to Prince Jason and told him how you were trained to fight just like your brothers, how you were taught to hunt and ride, if you found people to tell the prince about all your deeds during the boar hunt and showed him the trophy Atalanta gave you with the boar’s blood still on it”—he took a deep breath and looked at me steadily before concluding—“what do you think he’d say?”

We both knew the answer to that, but I had to say it. “That I shouldn’t bother about any fleece, golden or not, unless I was going to spin it into thread for weaving.” I hit the tree trunk with my fist. “It’s not fair, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

“It’s probably better this way,” Milo said, gazing up into the tree’s leafy crown. “Maybe if you were older—”

“Most of the men are taking weapons bearers with them. You can’t expect heroes to fetch and carry and clean up after themselves. I saw those boys in my uncle’s palace, before the great boar hunt. Some of them were younger than me!” I slumped against the oak and sighed again. “I could have gone with my brothers and done that kind of work for them from here to Colchis! They didn’t have to leave here without even one weapons bearer to serve them while they chased after the fleece. Castor said that no one in Delphi wanted the opportunity that you or I would die to have.”

“Why didn’t they ask two of the guards to go with them?” Milo asked.

“A soldier’s not a servant,” I told him. “The most loyal Spartan warrior would be insulted if he was asked to be a weapons bearer, even for a prince. It looks like Castor and Polydeuces will have to take care of themselves.”

Milo looked away from me. I was puzzled by this sudden shyness and tried to catch his eye, but he deliberately avoided my gaze. He reeked of guilty secrets.

“You’re the one,” I said. “You’re the scrawn—the boy Castor asked to go with him.” His silence was the same as shouting Yes! I knew it. “You just told me you wanted to join the quest for the fleece. You could have done it: Why didn’t you?”

“I couldn’t,” he mumbled.

“Why not? Because it’s safer to talk about dreams than to try making them real? What are you so afraid of?”

“Nothing!” He yelled so fiercely that a pair of oxen grazing in a nearby field snorted and moved farther away from us. It was the first time I ever saw fire in Milo’s eyes. “I’m no coward. That’s not why I wouldn’t go with your brothers. I have to go with you.”

“Who said so? You’re free now, Milo. Don’t you know what that means? You can come and go anywhere you like. You ought to appreciate it.”

“I appreciate you, Lady Helen!” Once Milo raised his voice, he couldn’t stop. He shouted so loudly that the two oxen trotted to the far side of the pasture as fast as they could move their massive bodies. “You’re the one who gave me my freedom. If I live to be fifty, I’ll never be able to repay you!”

Milo’s uproar attracted the attention of the two guards, but I waved them back when I saw them coming toward us. “Do you think you could be grateful quietly?” I asked. “This is between us, not us and all Delphi. You owe me nothing. Listen, if you leave now, you might still be able to catch up to my brothers. I’ll ask the Pythia for help. There must be at least one of Apollo’s pilgrims heading north today, one who’s going on horseback. If she tells him to carry you with him, you’ll overtake Prince Jason’s party in no time! I’ll give you whatever you’ll need for the road and—”

“Then I will be in your debt,” Milo countered. “If you say I’m free, why aren’t I free to stay with you, if that’s what I want?”

“Because it’s stupid!” I forgot my own caution about keeping our voices low. I’d decided that if I couldn’t win our argument with facts, I’d do it with volume. “Don’t you see, Milo? This is a better opportunity than anything that’s waiting for you in Sparta! What could you become if you went there? A potter, a tanner, a metalsmith, maybe a farmer’s boy or a shepherd. But if you sail to Colchis with my brothers, you could be—”

“Seasick,” Milo finished for me.

I raised my eyebrows. “Is that why you won’t go? Not even if it means passing up a once-in-a-lifetime chance for adventure? For a real future? I’m disappointed.”

Milo folded his arms. “Why don’t you just command me not to be seasick? Command me to go away and leave you, while you’re at it. Command me to join your brothers. It’s not what I want, but I guess that doesn’t matter after all.”

I was about to launch into another list of reasons why he should rush after my brothers when his words stopped me. Lord Oeneus was open-handed with commands, I thought. And it was worse for Milo when his hand closed into a fist. I shouldn’t bully Milo into joining the quest for the fleece just because I wish I could do it myself.