“No, it’s not, Jack! This is your life. Everything I’ve done has been for you, and I’ve changed everything to be with you. I gave up everything!”
“No, you…” His expression crumpled. “I thought you wanted this.”
“I did. I do,” I sighed and looked away from him. “I do. I just wanted something for me.”
“You really feel that way?”
“What way?” I asked, not sure what part he was referring to.
“That you gave up everything.” His blue eyes were so wounded, and I hated when he looked that way. “I was trying to give you everything.”
“No, Jack, I know that.” I rubbed my forehead, struggling to think of what I meant. “I don’t regret being here, and I know that you only try to make me happy.”
“But I’m not. Am I?” He leaned back, resting on the edge of the dining table behind him.
“Yes, you do. You make me so happy.” I stepped over to him, meaning to reassure him. “But maybe that’s not the only thing in life that matters.”
A knock at the French doors made Matilda bark, and Leif stood outside in the snow, tapping at the door. Jack rolled his eyes and stood up straighter, but he didn’t go anywhere. I waved Leif in, and he opened the door, letting an icy draft blow in.
“Is this a bad time?” Leif asked.
“Yes,” Jack said too loudly, and I shot him a look.
“No, come on in,” I told Leif, giving him a much softer look than one I gave Jack. “We’re just talking.”
“I didn’t mean to interrupt. The snow’s been really coming down today, but I can always find another place to sleep, if it’s a problem.” Leif had stepped inside the house, but he waited by the open door, ready for us to kick him to the streets.
“You know you’re always welcome here,” I said, but Leif looked at Jack, waiting for him to give his approval. When Jack didn’t say anything, I hit him in the arm. “Isn’t he, Jack?”
“Yes,” Jack said.
“I really don’t want to bother-” Leif started.
“No, you’re fine,” Jack said and waved him in. “You can crash on the couch in the living room if you want. The blankets and stuff are in the hall closet, and you can get cleaned up or whatever.”
“Thank you,” Leif said gratefully as he walked past us, down the hall.
“I see how it is,” Jack smiled after Leif had disappeared down the hall.
“What?” I asked.
“You do too think this is our house. If this really felt like my house, and not yours too, you wouldn’t have invited him in,” Jack said, looking a bit too smug.
“Oh, come off it! It’s supposed to snow like 12 inches by tomorrow. He doesn’t need to sleep outside in this,” I said.
“I wouldn’t make him sleep outside, but I’m not gonna pretend that we’re not in the middle of fighting just because he showed up.”
“You’re being rude,” I lowered my voice, even though Leif could probably hear everything I said anyway.
“You’re being rude,” Jack countered.
“How am I being rude?”
“Your brother had no problem changing his name. He’s more connected to me than you are.”
“That’s not rude! That’s just… Ugh!” I groaned, completely irritated by this whole thing. “My name is Alice Bonham because I am Alice Bonham! Why is that so hard for you to understand?”
“Didn’t you read Romeo & Juliet?” Jack asked. “A rose would still smell sweet and all that? You won’t stop being you if you change your name.”
“And I won’t turn into something else if I do change it, so what does it matter? Why can’t I just stay the same?” I asked.
“Your name is Alice Bonham,” Leif said. I looked away from Jack to see Leif standing at the edge of the room, holding blankets and pillows. His skin looked pale, and his expression had hardened.
“Yeah, sorry. You didn’t need to hear all that,” I said, my cheeks reddening.
“You’re from here?” Leif asked.
“That’s another reason you should change your name,” Jack interjected. “So people don’t associate you with the old, human you.”
“I’m not actually from here, so-” I stuck my tongue out at Jack, displaying the full magnitude of my maturity. “I was born in Idaho. We didn’t move here until I was like five because my gramma lived here, but she passed away, so I don’t have any other family to come looking for me.”
“Milo is your real brother?” Leif asked, and even though he was looking at me, I had the impression that he was staring off at something else entirely. “Not like… not like vampires.”
“No, he’s my actual brother. We have the same Mom. But listen, are you alright?” I asked. Something about him suddenly looked off.
“Yes, I’m fine. I think I’m… I’m just tired.” He forced a smile, but it only drew attention to how ill he looked.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jack asked, and even he sounded concerned, so it had to be bad.
“I’m quite alright.” Leif swallowed and went into the living room.