Suddenly, they both turned their gazes to me like two Rottweilers about to go after a favorite chew toy.
I threw up both my hands to fend off a possible grab as I took several more steps backward. I’d decided today, this minute, that I wouldn’t allow anymore grabbing to occur. This one pulling me here, that one picking me up and moving me there, the manhandling had officially come to an end. “I don’t know what your problem is with each other but leave me out of it.”
The room was so quiet that I could hear some shifting on the couch behind us before Murphy, who must have been speaking to Luck, said, “Did she really say she didn’t know what their problem was? I know she’s a transfer but isn’t that a little slow even for a human?”
Murphy’s words, although aggravating me more, seemed to have the opposite effect on Knox. He looked up and over like he was surprised we had an audience. I watched as the fight drained from him, and he made some excuse about having to go in the office for something or other.
Fate watched him leave, looking satisfied enough with the departure to not pursue him. He pulled out his phone, which part of my brain had realized had been ringing for quite some time, then shoved it back in his pocket.
He looked at me, all our unresolved issues hanging in the air between us. “I have to go.”
I shrugged. “So go.”
He stood there for a couple more seconds before he finally turned and left without saying another word to any of us.
The living room emptied out pretty quickly now that the show was over, leaving only Luck, Murphy and me.
Luck punched Murphy in the arm. “Murphy, I can’t believe you said that before. They all heard you and it was so uncomfortable they left.”
“You’re right, Luck.” Murphy cleared his throat and his next words came out considerably louder. “Karma, I’m sorry I said that. It’s not your fault you’re stupid sometimes. You can’t help it.”
She sighed loudly at him. “No, you’re the stupid one. What are we supposed to do now? There’s nothing on TV.”
There they sat on the couch, each with a cup of tea in their hands and some cookies on the table in front of them.
“What is going on here?” I said, motioning to the snacks. No TV playing in the background, just the two of them sitting and waiting for a show that didn’t air on cable.
“I know,” Luck said, making me think that she felt some shame about them using my life as a spectator sport, until she continued. “But whoever went shopping bought the wrong popcorn.” She shrugged.
Murphy nodded his head as he tapped his watch. “I have to agree. Even when the world is falling apart, you need to have standards to live by.”
“Get up,” I said to the two of them.
“Why? Are we going to go follow him into the office?” Luck asked, clearly intrigued by the possibility of more show time. Murphy’s animated head nodded vigorously in encouragement.
I sighed but didn’t bother to correct them. That was who they were and, as much as it annoyed me at times, they were my family. “No. We’re going out.”
Two disappointed ohs came out in unison.
“I guess if the show’s over,” Luck said. “Plus she’s upstairs in my room.”
Murphy let out a prolonged sigh. “I didn’t have any other plans, did you?”
Luck shook her head. “No. I guess we should go.”
Chapter Nineteen
It was after midnight when we got back from the dive bar Luck, Murphy and I went to. I’d chosen to frequent many of them in the recent past but it hadn’t been a deliberate choice this time around. There hadn’t been much of a selection of places to pick from. Most of the respectable establishments had shut down or were only opening during the daylight hours, when things were a notch calmer. The places open at night catered to the seediest crowds and you paid a premium to be in such esteemed company.
Tonight might have been the first time ever that Luck hadn’t found herself a boy toy she wanted to take home. It wasn’t for lack of trying. She’d been armed to the teeth with her best red lipstick and highest heels but the selection had been dismal and not up to even her low standards.
The stench from the foul karma people had been throwing off choked me almost as badly as the shots of cheap tequila I had thrown back. Still, Luck and Murphy stuck it out there with me until the wee hours of the morning. I’d needed some time away from the tension of the house, and Murphy was having a good time furthering the woes of our fellow customers, while Luck enjoyed watching.
Luck and Murphy stumbled their way upstairs once we got back as I headed toward Fate’s room—now mine. Even though I’d resented being put on the spot, I was glad I wasn’t walking past a room Fate was sharing with Mother.
My hand hesitated on the knob but not for long. Even with the argument today, I always wanted to see him. Too much so.
I pushed open the door to an empty room and looked at the clock on the table. Two a.m. and he wasn’t here.
I got ready for bed as I listened for the door. I crawled under the covers and lay there, watching the minutes tick by. Two thirty. Maybe between telling him I didn’t want to stay with him and our fight earlier, he’d finally given up.
This was what I’d wanted. I pulled a pillow over my head to block my sight and deaden my ears, forcing myself to stop waiting. It didn’t matter if he showed or not. In fact, it was good if he didn’t.
I threw the pillow to the side and got up, walked a few steps. Maybe I should check and see if Luck was okay since she drank a lot. It’s not like I cared if Mother was in her bed or anything.
No. If that was what he wanted, then it would never have been worth anything anyway. I knew eventually he would tire of wanting me. It was for the best. Getting attached as much as I already had wasn’t good. I wasn’t even sleeping with him and I was becoming a clingy mess. I turned around and got back in my bed again.
Fuck him. He was a dick. Who cuddles with someone every night and then disappears because of a couple fights? Cuddle and dump might be worse than a one-night stand. This was harder than when he’d asked me if I was still planning on leaving after we had sex. No, this might even be worse than when he stole my piece of birthday cake. God, he’d been such a dick to me. Come to think of it, I didn’t know why I was speaking to him at all.
Fate? No—Dick. That was his new name. He’d see who didn’t give a shit next time I saw him.
***
“You’re looking kind of tired,” Fate said the next morning.
“Nope. I slept like a baby, better than I have in weeks.” Dick.
We stood, side by side, about fifty feet from the entrance of the local supermarket that I’d shopped in less than a month ago, when it had been brand new. I’d been so excited to have a new market, free of all sorts of human reminders left over from my mortal days. I’d go in and not have to pretend that I didn’t know the cashier at the checkout or that I didn’t know the manager played poker with my dad on Thursday evenings, that I hadn’t babysat the kid collecting the carts from the parking lot.
Now I stood there, forcing myself to look at the transformation. One of the front windows had been knocked out completely, and a steady stream of people were going in and out through the gap like it was the main entrance to a store on a Black Friday sales bonanza.
How things had fallen so quickly was baffling to me. They were still human beings—unlike the bastard next to me, who I wanted to hit over the head with the hilt of the gun strapped to my ankle. Malokin was like a virus spreading through the human race, or maybe he was simply the by-product of a world heading downward that fed his birth. It was hard to know which came first, just that a coincidence this strong wasn’t usually chance.