Marren stopped my downpour of emotional babble by placing both hands on either side of my face and forcing me to look at him. “Shush. Everything is all right. Gvgeyu.” His lips pressed firmly into my forehead, burning my skin with the heat I thought I’d lost forever.
“You don’t understand, Marren, I—”
“I don’t need an apology or a reason for your behavior. I should have taken the time to explain things better to you. I am the one that should be sorry. I’m the one that thought pushing you away or keeping you at a distance would keep you safe. I’ve only done things to hurt you worse.”
I forced myself to pause, experiencing fear rising within him. “What do you mean?”
He hid something, albeit not that well, from me.
“Relena, Danst was injured. You should go to him while he’s still clinging to this world.”
My breath escaped me and failed to return. My lungs contracted, restricting the air from entering. My best friend, the one who helped me through all of those horrible nights after finding me in the woods, the one who taught me how to fight and sent my life in a chaotic tumble when I thought he betrayed me in order to save himself from the pain and torment that would kill him. My friend. My closest, dearest friend. No one could ever come close to him in my heart, not even Marren. Though Marren had my heart, a space would always remain in a place no one else could touch besides Danst. Danst was my only real family. He was all I had.
My eyes began to burn as tears stung them, yet they didn’t seem content to fall. I sat suspended in guilt and disbelief. No, he can’t die. He can’t. Can’t you save him? Can’t the elves?
Marren’s eyes darkened. My heart sank further. He was injured protecting you and the elves. There’s nothing they can do. I’m so sorry. We need to go before we’re too late.
I couldn’t make sense of that. How can Danst die? How did Marren know? He stood up and held his hand out to help me up. I stood, deep in my thoughts. So deep, the muscles kinked in my forehead.
I was aware you were protected by Tobias. I didn’t think he would betray me to get to Jiren. I woke and fought my way toward you. On the way, Danst was stabbed by Jiren.
I tried to make sense of what Marren explained to me. He discovered this before he found me? We started walking as Marren continued to explain.
I stopped to help him, understanding how much he means to you. But had I been aware of what Tobias was up to…
I don’t blame Tobias. I understood. Given the circumstances, I may have done the same thing. I’m not sure if my defending him helped Marren. Though, he gave a gentle squeeze to my hand, continuing out of the trees and into the tall grassy field, now covered with blood, acrid green ooze that steamed, and masses of bodies strewn all about.
All the blood. The bodies…
Marren stopped walking and pulled me into him, sensing I was no longer sure of all this death being worth the means to an end. People lost their lives. Because of me.
Don’t think about them, his thoughts whispered in my head. You’re safe, and that is what’s important. These people understood the consequences of fighting.
I nodded and pulled away from him. He gazed into my eyes as he rubbed my arms gently up and down, filling me with his warmth; warmth I missed so much. His eyes smiled at me once more then we turned toward the edge of the trees, to the boundaries of the elves.
***
Two tall elves, dressed in white robes, stood at the entrance between two trees. They lowered their heads in respect and allowed us through without a word. My heart palpitated anxiously. I held my breath waiting for them to tell Marren only he could pass. But none stopped me. As soon as we stepped through, I couldn’t help but focus on the center of what took up my vision.
The ground was carved out hollow, tapering down to a level platform. Trees arched above in a surrounding protective barrier. In the center, stood dwarves, elves, and werewolves. They stood solemnly with their heads bowed. Their arms hung slack at their sides or crossed at the wrists in front of them. My heart picked up in pace. Are we too late?
Marren didn’t answer. He continued leading me, instead, toward the center where Danst lay, taking his last few numbered breaths. How I clung to the hope he held on long enough for me to arrive at his side to say one last goodbye, but the silence was too thick. Not even the breathing of the races taking up the center of the elves home broke through the thick air.
Marren released my hand and my body took over, gently pushing through those standing around to find the one I needed to see, one final time.