Heart Song

“My servants have already left to prepare living spaces for us when we arrive. It keeps our party smaller and less likely to be detected. I’ve been seeing quite a few hunters around so let’s be mindful of traps,” Marren added.

 

I stared at Marren as he spoke, realizing he deliberately avoided my gaze. My heart sank a little more, making me wonder what it was I did wrong. I felt the stabbing sting of tears nipping at my eyes. I turned my back to the group and tried to blink them away. If necessary, I could blame the lack of sleep. I didn’t pay much attention to the rest of what he said but started walking when everyone else did. At least Danst stayed by my side.

 

“Did something happen between you two last night?” Danst asked.

 

“I don’t know. I don’t think so, why?”

 

“It’s like he’s purposefully trying to keep his distance from you.” Danst caught on to how much it affected me, trying to get me to talk about it as he usually did, but I wasn’t in the mood.

 

“I’m sure he has a reason. This trip has had him on edge for several days,” I said, hoping it would be enough.

 

“Didn’t you ask him about it?”

 

“No. He’ll talk to me when he’s ready. He’s good about that,” I said.

 

“Danst, come up here to lead the line please,” Marren said. We both understood it wasn’t a request.

 

“Duty calls,” Danst said.

 

I smiled as he jogged to the front of the line. He stepped into the forest first with Raden in tow, then Marren, Enid, and finally, myself.

 

The terrain was slick and soggy from the storm that had passed through the night before. Even the air was thick and hard to breathe. The moisture caused my robes to stick to my back and legs.

 

It wasn’t long before I couldn’t stand the silence between us anymore. I had to know what was going on.

 

Did I do something that upset you? I asked.

 

No.

 

Is there a reason for not acknowledging me then?

 

I am acknowledging you. He said, but I wasn’t convinced.

 

You’re ignoring the fact that I’m behind you and done very little in the way of acknowledging me.

 

Now is not the time, Relena. Even in thoughts, his words were tinged with anger.

 

I shoved back the pain that inflicted my heart, giving it a few more cracks appeared and a few chips fell off. Then I did what I normally do when I get hurt, I got angry. He had the nerve to avoid me and not give me a reason.

 

I think I at least deserve some form of explanation. Don’t you think? I asked.

 

Relena, I need time to sort out my thoughts. Can we talk later?

 

No.

 

Gvgeyu, please?

 

I shoved my way through the trees in an uphill climb. Grunting with a few of them. Nope. I’m not a woman of convenience. You should know that. And if you were going to be so turned off by me coming with you, you should have said something.

 

I tried to talk you out of it. Please let me get everyone to the cross over safely.

 

I stopped moving and stared at the ground. So that’s it? You didn’t want me to be with you after all?

 

He ignored me.

 

We reached level ground with uneasy silence. A thick silence that didn’t come from my heated anger with Marren, but from within the woods itself. Nothing moved. Not a leaf in the breeze or a blade of grass. Nothing. No sounds, no movement.

 

Stay close to me.

 

Oh, so now you want to acknowledge me?

 

Relena, please, now is not the time.

 

It’s never the right time with you.

 

He turned and stared coldly at me. I stuck my tongue out at him with my arms crossed over my chest. I didn’t even try to hold back my anger and hurt over the way he was acting toward me. He shook his head and turned around slowly.

 

“Just give me a reason, Marren,” I said in as calm of a voice as I could muster.

 

Enid and Raden glanced behind them. They turned forward and kept on walking, following a gesture from Marren. His eyes fell on me with a chill that froze me in place. I tried to force away the pain his look brought and only focused on the anger.

 

“Now is not the time to talk about it. Wait, please?”

 

“You made me believe in a love that didn’t exist in this world for anyone else. And here you are turning your back against me, like everyone else in this pathetic, miserable excuse for an existence.” I spoke low, stressing every single syllable. “You want time to sort out your thoughts? Fine by me, but I can’t guarantee that I will be willing to accept you back.”

 

I stepped forward, moving past him as he said, “Relena.”

 

I ignored him.

 

“Relena, wait.” He grabbed my arm and forced me to turn around. I glared at him. “Why do you take my mood personally? I’m not trying to avoid you, and I’m not meaning to be cold to you. Why are you reacting this way?”

 

“Now you’re the one that’s blind,” I said then stomped off.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 12

 

 

Crossing Over