He kissed her gently again, pushing back the long silky hair that had come out of the thick braid. He preferred it down, spilling all around them on the pillows. He always wanted white sheets now, just to see the contrast of her dark hair tumbling around them. Her body trembled again, a shiver he felt moving through him. Already they were connected in the way of the shifters. The bond wasn’t strong yet, but he was forging it, binding them together with tiny threads she’d never be able to break.
Her brilliant blue eyes searched his. He couldn’t see one hint of her cat. She had exotic eyes, like most of their kind. He’d slowly begun learning to identify shifters by their eyes. Hers were gorgeous and very distinct in coloring and shape. Her leopard might have receded, hopefully resting up for the big event, but her eyes would always give her away. He should have known the moment he’d seen her. He’d been drawn to her, even reading her file, but he still hadn’t gotten it. Drake would have scowled at him and shaken his head in irritation.
“I’m so afraid.” The admission came out softly. “I barely know who I am anymore. I feel lost and alone and I don’t have anyone I can trust.”
Every word she said was a major body blow. He hated that he’d done that to her. Her voice shook with pain. It was impossible not to feel it. The worst part of it was he could tell she wanted to let go of what had happened and give him the same trust all over again, but she didn’t know how.
“I know, sweetheart. I know you are, but I’m not going anywhere. Not ever. If you want a fucking ring right now, we’ll go get one and find someone to make it legal. I’d do anything to make you feel you have someone that’s going to stay and fight for you.” He nibbled on her chin. Her sweet chin that sometimes lifted defiantly and made him hard just watching the tiny little gesture. He loved her rebellious. He loved her sweet. He loved her when she gave him everything.
“You know, Kitten, you do trust me a little bit. When I make love to you, you surrender totally to me. Always. You always give yourself to me.”
She shook her head, frowning a little. “That’s you, or maybe her. That’s not me.”
He kissed her neck. Kissed the fluttery pulse right there on her throat. He couldn’t help himself, he had to feel it under his lips, the one little spot that confirmed she was alive, was his, lying there under him, looking up at him with her beautiful eyes.
“That’s all you, Catarina. Your body knows I’m here to stay. Let me back in, sweetheart. Take another chance on me.”
He kissed his way down the valley between her breasts, feeling her shiver again as the shadow on his face rasped against her sensitive skin.
“This isn’t okay, Eli.” Her hands curled around his shoulders and she pushed, without really exerting much effort.
“What, baby? What’s not okay?”
“This. You. This is different.” Fear crept into her voice.
He swept his hand down her body, his palm absorbing the warmth of her satin skin. Already there were dewdrops in the tight curls guarding treasure. He slipped his finger deep. She was tight. She was always tight. Sometimes, he thought he might not make it inside her she was so damn tight. But always, always, she was slick and hot and ready for him.
He nuzzled her breast gently, using the rough hairs along his jaw to stimulate her more. He loved the way her body was so responsive. He was the one drowning. He’d been so busy trying to convince her to fall for him, he hadn’t realized just how far he’d fallen. He couldn’t help himself.
He used both hands to shape her body, to slide over every lush curve and trace every rib along her narrow rib cage. She was his. All his. She might be afraid, and she might be on the verge of running, but when he had her under him, she belonged to him.
He should have taken her gently the first time. Like this. Like she feared he was doing. The rough, hard sex she could blame on their cats, but this, this was all them. The man. The woman. And it terrified her. He didn’t take his gaze from hers and her every emotion was there for him to see. Pain. Fear. Need. Even the beginnings of the love he’d seen before, there in the warehouse. That’s what scared her. That’s what had her hands pushing at his shoulders. She could take his orders. She could take his rough. She couldn’t handle sweet or gentle.
“Eli. This isn’t right,” she whispered again.
“This is exactly right, Cat. This is what you deserve. Slow and easy and loving.” He kissed his way back up to her mouth. A sweet, fantasy mouth that left him breathless and gave him one too many erotic images playing in his head all the time.
Her eyes went wide with shock and fear. She shook her head frantically. “I don’t want this.”
“Baby.” Gentle male amusement. He couldn’t help it. “You’re already wet and hot for me. What kind of man would I be to leave you like that?”
Panic spread in her eyes. She swallowed hard. “I know. It’s just that you can’t do it like this.”