Armored Hearts

chapter 11

Gareth sat in his chair at the bottom of the foyer as the music played. He did his best to smile, but it felt so unnatural, he finally stopped.

Tabitha was the first to descend the stairs in a stylish floral gown, her blonde hair pulled up in an elegant coiffure. She smiled at Gareth as she took her place to the side. Gareth thought about how pretty she looked. The dress was more expensive than any she’d ever worn before. Probably a gift from Jessamine. He wished he could have provided it for her. She deserved to have pretty things and a new life in America. No one there would know her sordid beginnings or care. She’d be foreign and accepted as a lady by Americans impressed by her link to the Kellers, whose daughter would hold an English title. Tabitha would find a respectable husband who adored her and be happy.

He swallowed the emotions which followed that thought. Tabitha was his only companion—the only one in the whole house who had ever fully accepted Gareth. And in two days, she would be gone. He swallowed the thought away. It was selfish. He couldn’t hang on to her for his sake. She’d go and be happy, and he would be alone.

The music changed. Everyone stood and turned. Jessamine descended the stairs in a corseted white, lace dress which hugged her figure in all the aesthetically pleasing areas. Gareth’s breath caught as his eyes swept over her. She smiled a warm greeting to all the attendants before making eye contact with him. Her dark eyes took on a different appearance when she looked at him. She smiled and bit her lip before a blush flushed her cheeks, and she lowered her gaze to watch him again under long, dark lashes. Gareth had a sense of déjà vu.

Jessamine took her father’s arm at the bottom of the stairs, and he escorted her to the altar. She stood beside Gareth’s chair and faced the vicar. The ceremony was a blur. Each gave the proper response until Reverend Piper told him to kiss her. Gareth glanced about and then up at Jessamine. She grinned down before bending toward him. Just when her face was at his, she whispered, “Do not make a spectacle of my wedding. You’ve behaved so far. I won’t attach any meaning to this gesture. So if you so much as flinch, I will make you regret it.”

Gareth nodded, trying to make out her words, but the cloud of her warmth and scent made him dizzy. Then her warm, soft lips touched his. He hadn’t expected to respond, but without thinking, his hands held her face to his, and he kissed her in return. She stood, and too quickly, it was over. His mind was left a muddle, and his body felt chilled so far from the warmth of hers. The disappointed tug in his gut surprised him as he watched her stand and smile at the guests.

Tabitha rushed toward them, hugging Jessamine first and then Gareth.

Tabitha brushed a loose blonde curl from her blue eyes as she stood. “Gareth, I know you’ll be so happy with Jessie once you get to know her. She’s perfect for you. I’ve prayed for you for such a long time, that God would send you someone who could see past the chair and your grumpiness, and He has. She’s someone you can be yourself with. I promise. Don’t throw this away before giving her a chance.”

Gareth wasn’t sure how much Tabitha knew about the whole arrangement. He doubted she understood that her new friend was simply after his title, or that his agreement to the marriage was for Tabitha’s financial security. She was young, romantic, and naïve, believing her friend truly wanted a love match.

Gareth only smiled at his young aunt. He couldn’t crush her belief in happy endings.

Everyone was escorted to the dining hall where Gareth rolled himself up on the dais. Jessamine took her place beside him. She leaned into him and said, “Thank you for not making a scene at the wedding.”

Gareth whispered in her ear, “Better to just get the whole bloody thing over with.”

Jessamine smiled at him and placed her hand on his. “You are such a romantic.”

Dinner was served. While they were eating, Jessamine said in passing, “I want you to know that I respected your wishes today.”

Gareth sliced the meat on his plate, not bothering to look at her. “And how did you do that? Did you book your passage back to America with your father?”

“No, when you said, go away…I did.”

“What on earth are you talking about?” He concentrated on his bite of ham and avoided looking at her.

“Today I came to tell you something. I’d wanted it out of the way before the wedding, but you wanted to be alone. Now it will have to wait until you’re alone in the bedroom with me.”

Gareth smirked at her and shook his head. “You are mistaken if you think we will actually be sharing a bedroom.”

Jessamine leaned in. “You are mistaken if you think we won’t. At least for tonight anyway.” She gestured out at the dining hall. “Many of our guests are staying the night. They had to use my room for another couple. Sarah moved my things over to your room.”

Gareth only glared at her in response. He didn’t speak to her for the rest of the meal.

The meal gave way to music and chatter. They had not arranged for dancing because of Gareth’s condition. It wasn’t until later that Gareth broke his silence toward Jessamine, when he saw Mr. Strong take his bride’s hand and kiss it. Gareth pushed his chair hard, nearly knocking guests over as he made his way to Mr. Strong and Jessamine.

“Gareth! I was just introducing myself to your lovely bride.” The old man grinned wide.

“I’d love to hear some of your stories about Gareth. I’m sure you have many,” Jessamine said to the old man and nodded.

“Indeed I do.” The old man placed a hand on Gareth’s shoulder. “Your bride is enchanting.”

Gareth knocked the old man’s hand from him. “Yes, she is. Please excuse us.” He took Jessamine’s hand and led her away.

Jessamine pulled away from him once they were alone in the library. “That was rude.”

Gareth scowled at her as he spat the words, “Don’t talk to that man.”

Jessamine glowered back at Gareth, placing her hands on her hips. “Why not?”

“I don’t…” Gareth choked on the words. “I don’t trust him.” He swallowed the bile back as he said the words about his former tutor. A man who had helped shape him into an adult.

“But he was your tutor and seemed so genuine and friendly.”

“Yes, but I’ve outgrown tutors so there’s no need for any further contact. There’s no reason for him to remain in town any longer. He should move back home to his wife.”

Jessamine’s dark eyes grew into giant, black dots of coal as she glared back at him. “And when we go back out there, what would you have me do? Refuse to speak to the man?”

Gareth glanced at the door. Being in the same room with that man wasn’t anything he could stomach at the moment. “We won’t go back out there. I’ve had enough of everyone for the evening. We should retire. Then when we wake, this will all be over.” At least the wedding party would be, anyway.

“Not returning would be rude. Won’t people think it strange if we don’t at least say goodbye?”

Gareth grinned a mischievous smile, “They will think it rude of me, but they won’t think it strange of me.”

Jessamine burst into laughter. “I’m sure that’s very true. But you don’t expect me to be so rude to our guests in the future, do you?”

“I don’t expect us to have any guests in the future.”

“Well, let me go up first so I can ready myself for bed.” Jessamine headed for the door.

Gareth pushed his chair in her way. “No, I will go first. I’ll send Tabitha when you can come up.”

Jessamine’s shoulders sagged in exasperation. “But it’s our wedding night. I need to change and prepare myself.”

Gareth turned the chair away from her in dismissal. “It’s not a real wedding night so don’t trouble yourself with any preparation other than that which is needed for sleep.”

He wheeled his chair out of the room, leaving Jessamine with what he imagined to be a look of disappointment on her face. Tabitha met him in the corridor.

“Gareth, I was looking for you and Jessamine. Grandfather wants to propose a toast to you both.”

“Well, he’ll have to do it without us present. Tell him we have retired for the night. Please give everyone our regrets and thank them for attending… blah, blah, blah. You know, the kind of things you would say and I never would. Now help me watch for people so I can get up to my room. Then you can go get Jessamine and send her up.”

Tabitha’s pink lips grew into the biggest smile. “She’s planned the biggest surprise for you. I can’t wait to hear about it all tomorrow morning.”

Gareth’s eyes widened. “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this sort of thing with you.”

Tabitha giggled as she pushed Gareth behind the stairs and looked about for others. “I’m not talking about what you think I’m talking about, I assure you.” She walked the perimeter. “It’s all clear.”

Gareth escaped up the side of the stairs to the upper floor and went straight for his room. He noticed that Sarah or Thompton had brought in a dressing screen and had placed Jessamine’s trunk behind it. He then noticed a hairbrush on the nightstand and perfume beside it. He stood by it and picked up the bottle and sniffed. It was that smell, the one which clouded his thinking.

He quickly changed to his pajamas and climbed into bed. How would they work this out? He couldn’t ask a lady to sleep on the floor and blast it if he would give up his bed for the woman. Maybe he would tell her to sleep on the floor. Perhaps that could be the end of it all, and she’d leave on her own the next morning.

Jessamine knocked on the door before peeking in. “Is it all right if I enter now?”

“No, but I have no choice in the matter.”

She pushed the door closed behind her and looked at the bed, and Gareth in it. “Wow.” She swallowed hard. “You’re already in bed.” Her cheeks flushed as her long lashes fluttered. She bowed her head and bit her lip. “I guess I’ll get ready behind that screen.”

Gareth picked up a book and pretended to read. “Or go to bed fully dressed if you like. Makes no difference to me.” He didn’t bother to look at her.

A few moments later, silk rustled and Jessamine’s dress appeared, hanging over the screen. He swallowed and perspiration broke out on his forehead. He shook his head and tried to concentrate on the book in front of him rather than the thought of the beautiful woman disrobing in his room. He could hardly make out the words in the book when he heard her walking toward the bed. He refused to look at her at first.

“I’m just a bit nervous, being in here with you now.” A tremor shook her voice.

Gareth glanced up to see Jessamine wrapped in a pink silk dressing gown, almost swaddling herself with it. Her chestnut hair was down around her shoulders, as it had been the night he’d flown her to safety. He was glad she was still fully covered.

“No reason to be nervous. You have slept before, I assume. I promise you, that’s all that can possibly happen tonight.”

Jessamine’s forehead scrunched and wrinkled above her narrowed eyes. “What do you mean?”

“My condition.” Gareth motioned to his legs. “There can never be more than a brother-sister relationship between us. Did I not mention that before?” Gareth made an expression of false surprise. “Guess you have grounds for an annulment.”

Jessamine shook her head as a mischievous smirk appeared. She sauntered toward him. “I know better than that. Do you remember how we were first introduced? How we met?” She continued to move closer.

Memories of her landing in his lap flashed through his mind. “Yes, you were quite clumsy.”

Jessamine’s voice grew husky when she stood in front of him. “I found out all I needed to know about the extent of your condition in that very first moment.”

Gareth’s brows furrowed at first as he tried to understand what she meant. The moment her words sunk in, his mouth hung open at the memory of Jessamine tumbling into his lap and how he’d pushed her out of it, trying not to embarrass himself and her. “You planned that…to find out…?” Gareth glared up at her, his nostrils flared. “No wonder Americans are thought of as crass and ill mannered. No true lady would ever do such a thing.”

Jessamine glanced off to the side for just a second. “No, I’m not a true lady. One of the reasons I’m not welcome into the upper echelons of American society. But ladies tend to be stodgy and boring anyway.”

She fixed her gaze on Gareth as she moved closer to the bed. Her voice grew husky once again. “You know, refusing me tonight is unlawful. Doesn’t scripture say something about not denying your spouse? Something about my body belonging to you and yours to me? I could run down and ask Reverend Piper what the scripture reference is. We were just married before God and family, remember? You made a promise to me in front of them all, and I plan to hold you to it.”

Gareth pressed his back into the pillows stacked behind him in an attempt to put space between him and his new bride. She bent over him, her face inches from his. Her warm, sweet breath tickled the skin on his neck, causing goosebumps to pimple there. The floral scent of her perfume addled his brain as usual. He swallowed. “Miss Keller…”

“No, it’s Mrs. Smyth now or Lady Smyth if you like. I’m your wife and this is our wedding night. You claim to be a helpless cripple so…” She moved in until their foreheads touched. Gareth could feel the mattress sink where her knee now pressed against his outer thigh. “Maybe I’ll take advantage of your helplessness. You say I trapped you. Consider this bed my web and you my fly. Prepare to be devoured.”

Gareth couldn’t respond, his mind in utter shock. He should make some nasty retort, but there was too much appeal to her threat. He swallowed and tried to speak as she moved in to kiss him. He reached up to brush a strand of hair from her face and leaned in. She was beautiful.

Just as their lips were about to meet, Jessamine was up in an instant and off the bed, walking toward the balcony. “But taking advantage of your helplessness would be wrong of me…very, very wrong. If you don’t want me in that way, I just need to accept it and respect your wishes.”

Gareth shook his head and struggled to speak, “But…What?” was all that he could manage, his mind still addled. His breaths came in whispered pants, and he swallowed. Had the room grown warm, or was it just him?

Jessamine reached into the pocket of her dressing gown. “I got you a wedding gift. I wanted to give it to you earlier today and talk to you about it but you didn’t grant me admittance.”

She traipsed back to the bed and handed him the small, wrapped box. “I used to have two of these, but I lost one as a child, on a trip to visit my aunt… at least that’s what I told my mother. In truth, I left the other with someone as a thank you. ” She backed away. “I’m going out on the balcony for air. When you open it, if you have questions…you will know where to find me.” Her smile was shy before she turned and stepped out the balcony door.

Gareth stared after her, desperately calming himself. Once he finally got himself together, he opened the box. Inside was a small blue-green stone. It was smooth and looked almost identical to the one he had. Gareth’s breath caught. He stared out the door of the balcony. He leaned over to his nightstand and yanked the drawer open. He pulled out the stone he’d had since childhood and held the two together. They nearly matched in size and were identical in color.

Gareth swallowed. “Miss Keller?”

No answer.

“I mean Mrs…oh bother…Jessamine? Come in here immediately. Explain the meaning of this gift. I need to know where you got this stone.”

Jessamine didn’t answer. Gareth flew to just behind the door and stood in the doorway, peering out. “Jessamine?” He glanced around the door out onto the balcony but she wasn’t there.

“Jessamine?” He flew out onto the balcony, glancing in every direction. It was small with no place to hide. Her dressing gown puddled on the floor.

Where had she gone? Gareth looked out into the darkness. She said if he had questions, he’d know where to find her…and he did.