A Mischief in the Woodwork

CHAPTER 27

Void

The other thing I became obsessed with, following what became of my own essence in the city that day, was the new awareness of a strange void. I became aware of this void after events drove me to seek my reflection in a mirror. A mirror was not a luxury we sported in Manor Dorn, but I found one in the city, during my next loot. I saw it, in the rubble, and could not quiet the need to see what had become of me. Not simply because I had not looked in a mirror for a number of years, but because I had cause to question myself, these days.

I looked in that mirror, searched my reflection for the girl that lived inside me. If Tanen's theory of other dimensions had any merit, this was a small way I was giving it the chance to show me. And I had my own theory, as well;

When I was good and ready, I raised my gifted fingers, and touched my reflection in that mirror.

What would I see? It was a question that inevitably tormented me with curiosity. So it was a great disappointment, and a great thing of confusion, when I saw nothing. Not a single vision stirred. No sentiments, no sensations. Not a whisper, or echo, or flicker.

My inner workings were closed to me.

I did not know what to make of such a quandary, but it was inevitable that the inhibition frustrated me. How could I see into everything around me, but not myself?

Determined – or perhaps defiant – I took that mirror home with me. It was not something easily stowed in my pack, but I hoisted it and bore it the long trek home without caring.

In the days that followed, while Tanen was treated and healed from his wounds, I found myself before that mirror without realizing I'd taken myself there, set on scrying the secrets from my own eyes. My taunting replica remained sealed behind the glass, however, and all I ever gained was the feeling of the pane against my fingers. Cold, smooth, and unyielding.

It did not even have the decency to grant me as much texture as a painting.