“Stop worrying about one day. Just enjoy today. None of us knows what’s going to happen tomorrow,” I say and lean in. My beard brushes the side of her face as I trail soft kisses down from her temple to her jaw. She doesn’t move or sigh or do any of that girly shit that other chicks do when I make a move on them. No, not Nic. She just sits there and lets me do my thing, but she gives me nothing to go on.
“That doesn’t work for me,” she says. “You’ve been through at least a hundred women. I’ve seen it. What makes this so different?” she asks in a tone that sounds so defeated and so fucking sad that it’s like a shovel to my abdomen.
“You’re different,” I say. “You called me a cocksucker. Not that I advise you try it again, but you did it. You’re tough as hell, and you don’t even know it.” I don’t say the thing I want to say—that all of those women were really fucking easy, and really fucking stupid. They all like the idea of being an Old Lady, but none of them were cut out for it. It takes a special kind of woman to put up with the club and its members. Nic doesn’t know it yet, but she’s got it. She’s got that fire and that backbone that an Old Lady needs. She’s loyal and protective, and she can be mean as all fucking hell. Makes sense since she was raised in this life, but with all the shit she’s seen, she’s damaged as fuck. And the more fucked up I realize she is—the more broken she shows herself to be—the more I want to glue her back together.
“But I’m not,” she says.
But she is.
Talking isn’t working out so well for me, so instead I decide to just move on. My bones ache with the need to be inside her. I need to show her in the only way I think she’ll understand that I care about her and I’m going to care about her in a few weeks, and a few months, and even years down the line. I’m going to show her that this is forever.
I bring one hand up and cup her face. Her green eyes stare back at me and then close. I move in, pressing my lips against hers. She’s so fucking soft in a million ways, but not her bottom lip. She’s always chewing on the damn thing, and it shows with the bits of cracked skin on the sides. She responds, moving her lips against mine and pulling me in closer.
Nic slides down the bed, letting me crawl on top of her and cover her body with my own. This feels right in a million fucking ways I can’t explain. She reaches down for my dick, but I bring her hand back up above her head. I want to take things slow with her, but if she starts pulling on my dick, shit’s gonna happen really fast. As it is, I’m not very used to going slow. Normally I’m all about getting my orgasm going as fast as I fucking can, but this isn’t about me. This is about showing Nic that she’s more than a good fuck. She’s everything.
A few minutes pass of us kissing, so I start sliding my body up and down hers to create friction. My dick gets so hard I worry I’m gonna blow a load right here, and I’m not even inside her yet. It doesn’t matter that I had her twice this morning.
Taking a few deep breaths, I force myself to calm down and be more patient. I want her to enjoy this in every way possible, and that’s not going to happen if I keep thinking about myself and my dick. She lets out a soft moan when I drag my dick over her pussy. She places a soft kiss on my forehead, and it’s so fucking sweet. I don’t think she can know what her being sweet does to me. Looking up and locking eyes with her, I place a gentle kiss on her lips and then pull back.
“You don’t believe me, but I’m going to show you that this is different,” I whisper. Pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth, she nods and keeps her eyes focused on mine.
The mood in the room shifts, and we’re moving impossibly slow. It’s like fucking torture when I take her night shirt off, inch by inch, kissing my way up her flat belly and then her tits, up her collarbone and then to her neck. But as hard as I am, I wouldn’t trade this moment for any fucking thing on the planet.
No more clubhouse fucks. If I want to show Nic that I’m serious, I can’t be fucking her like she’s some whore in a bed I’ve taken countless women to. This right here is the way it should be, but it should be in our house, in the bed we share every night. And if I have my way, that’s how it’s going to be.
Achingly slowly, I slide down her body and remove her panties, which are already damp. Diesel’s comment from earlier flies through my brain, and, for a brief moment, I’m fucked in the head. Thinking about Diesel licking her pussy just plain pisses me the fuck off. She’s just a piece of ass to him, and that ain’t right. Nic deserves better. She definitely deserves better than me, but I’m a selfish prick and I want to keep her for myself. Looking up at her, I see that she’s propped her head up so she can watch me between her legs.