“You don’t have to tell me anymore tonight. I get that you just shared a fuck load,” I say, reassuring him that I am happy he shared with me. I am greedy and want more, but I won’t push for anymore tonight.
My body protests its cruel and unusual punishment. I need rest, but not yet. I want to bask in this moment of feeling safe and somewhat trusted.
“Ever since I can remember, my mother worked. Whether it was waitressing or dancing, which I recently learned was actually stripping, she worked. She didn't show up to my school plays or talent shows. She always had an excuse; she was always working.
“She would find the worst sitters when I was young. One sitter she hired would lock me in my room with a chair against the door. The only times she would let me out was for food and right before she knew my mother was coming home. I tried to tell my mother but she never believed me.
“As I got older, her distance from me got worse, but when she met Stevin, the distance became hostile. When she was home, we fought badly. I didn't do anything right in her eyes, and she would always say I was abnormal and needed help.” My head throbs with the effort to remember, causing me to pause.
“My mother was very precise about my future. I was just as trapped in my life with her as I was in that locked room,” I share with Shadow, trying to give him a glimpse at why I was a naive little girl when I showed up. A Tit-for-Tat, if you will.
“Why didn't you just move out?” Shadow asks, as if it was so easy.
“I tried, she forbid it. She took all the money out of my bank account and threatened the girl I was going to move in with. I was stuck with the bitch,” I explain. My mother didn’t want me, but didn’t want anyone else to have me either. That's why it doesn't make sense that she left me here so easily.
“Enough sharing for tonight, we have a busy day tomorrow. Seems you're moving in with me,” Shadow says, getting comfy behind me. My eyes snap open wide, nearly popping a blood vessel.
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I can’t breathe; the air is thick and demanding as it fills my lungs. Everything is dark. My eyes dart around trying to find light, but it’s pitch black. I’m lying on my side and have no idea where I am. I try and move my hands to get up but when I pull my hands my feet tug; I’m hog tied. No, not again! I’ve been taken against my will. I feel my heart race; panic cascades down my spine. My lips tremble with fear as I try and listen to the surrounding noise, the thumping from my heart making it hard. It sounds like a car engine. Suddenly my body is thrown up and then slammed back down and red lights illuminate the area. I’m in a trunk. How did I get here? I don’t remember being thrown into a trunk. I hear car doors open and shut and then whistling as footsteps make their way to the back of the car. The trunk pops open. The sun is shining so brightly behind two people I can’t make out who they are, just silhouettes.
“Oh, yeah, she will sell well!” one of them says.
A dark, tanned hand reaches in and rubs my cheek; it's soft and silky and smells of cigars. I shake my head violently back and forth.
“No. No. Please, no!” I cry, trying to pry my hands from the bindings, only to have it cut deeper into my skin.
“I wanted to sample her out for you, but wanted your permission first, Poppy,” a familiar voice says, rough and husky. The silhouette leans in and I realize it's Ricky, his tongue darting out of his mouth to lick his cracked, dry lips. I thought he was dead; what’s he doing here?
“Yes, by all means go for it,” Poppy says. I still can’t see his face from the blinding light.
“I knew you wanted that slut!” a female voice sobs. The voice is familiar, but I can’t put a face to it.
Both guys throw their hands up in surrender and step back from the trunk. Why are they doing that? I can’t see from laying in the trunk, so I try to lift my head and see over the rim. A small silhouette appears in my line of view, but all I can focus on is the gun pointing at me.
“Die!” the voice yells. It's Cassie!
“Noooo!” I scream.
“Dani! Dani, wake the fuck up!” I hear Shadow yelling at me, his hands shaking me by my shoulders.
I open my eyes, running from the dreadful terror behind closed lids. I’m soaked with sweat and my breathing is so spastic I feel I may stroke out at any moment. It was just a bad dream... just a dream, I chant silently to myself.
“Calm down and breathe,” Shadow coaxes me as he rubs my back to help soothe me.
“Damn, that must have been a hell of a dream,” Shadow whispers, his voice sexy and rough from sleep.
We lay there in the dark room in silence. I’m too afraid to go back to sleep. I can’t sleep. I need a shower. I need Ricky’s mouth off of me.
I throw my legs over the bed only to jerk them back up again. What if he’s under the bed? No, Shadow killed Ricky; he can’t hurt me anymore, right? I put my legs back over the edge of the bed, hesitant. What about Cassie though? My mind haunts me, making me pull my legs back up onto the bed.