Thunderstruck (Ramsey Security #1)

"You're very insecure. I find that a curious thing," she says, tapping her chin. "Were you a shy child? Did you wet the bed?"

Darla leans her head back and laughs at her own joke. Watching her, I take in all of the beauty before me. If Doctor Parker tries to convince Darla to dump me, I don't know how I'll react. Normally, I kill people who stand in my way. Killing the shrink might be a bad move. Instead, I might want to threaten her husband until Doctor Parker tells Darla I'm a solid guy.

"What are you thinking about?" Darla asks, frowning now. "You look a little scary."

Leaning forward, I kiss her cheek. "I am a little scary."

"You hide it usually. What else do you hide?"

My hands wrap around her shoulders and massage the tense muscles. "Nothing important."

"Are you close to your family?"

"No. Wait, I'm friends with them on Facebook. Does that count?"

"Not really."

Darla sighs as I massage her neck. "Do you think of your mom often?"

I refuse to react physically to her question. Mentally, I'll be perfectly happy never to think of my mom again.

"No."

"Was she a bad mother?" she asks, turning her head to look back at me.

"She was vacant."

Darla frowns, not truly understanding.

"You never told me about your parents," I say, changing the subject while my fingers work at the tension in her neck.

"They died in a plane crash. It was one of those small planes, and my dad's friend was the pilot. Bad weather and pilot error caused the crash."

"Do you hate the pilot?"

"No."

"You should," I say, and Darla leans back against my chest.

"Do you wish someone caused your mom's death, so you wouldn't have to hate her?"

Her words are like a punch to the gut. If she was anyone else, I'd fucking hate her for being right. Instead, I study Darla staring at me with her big eyes and imagine what my mom might think about her. Darla is too curvy and inviting for a prim and proper woman like Rebecca Sheridan. My mother also didn't approve of public displays of emotion, and Darla is often a walking ball of feelings. No, my mom would certainly not approve of Darla.

"I don't think her dying at someone else's hands would have helped much. I was too old when she died to romanticize her."

Darla's gaze darkens as if my sad sack childhood breaks her heart.

"Don't buy into your female need to pity me. I grew up in a nice neighborhood in a safe home and went to a good school. My father replaced his beloved first love with a second wife a year later. My step mom treated me like a hero for remembering to put down the lid after a piss."

Darla's gaze softens, and a smile spread over her lips. "Do you want to stop talking or can I ask more questions?"

"Ask away, beautiful."

"Is your father mad that you didn't go into the Navy?"

Skimming her forehead with my lips, I smile. "I did go into the Navy. Went into SEALs training too but quit halfway through. Yeah, that part pissed him off."

"Why did you quit?"

"I didn't want some asshole bossing me around. In the military, even the toughest fuckers need to follow orders," I explain before taking her hand and guiding her out of the kitchen and into the living room. We sit on the couch where I wrap her in my arms possessively.

"I was lying in bed one day during training. My body hurt. My exhausted mind was racing. SEALs training is brutal, but I was doing well. Making my dad proud."

Pausing, I link my large fingers with Darla's short slim ones.

"So I'm lying in bed and wishing I could sleep. I knew they might expect us to wake at any minute. I wanted to rest, but something was bothering me. Talking to myself in my head, I reminded myself that my dad and brother stayed tough through this same BUD/S training. I was following in their footsteps. That's when I realized I didn't give a shit. About being like them or making anyone proud. I refused to fucking spend my life taking orders. I had skills, sure, but those skills didn't have to be put to use in the same way they were for Dad and Kevin. I could find my own way, so I fucked up on purpose and got dropped from BUD/S. My dad wanted me to try again, but I was done with the military. As soon as I could get out without going AWOL, I took off and never looked back."

"What then?" she asks in a dreamy voice. Her head rests against my chest as she smiles up at me.

"Are you sleepy?"

"Your heartbeat is making me want a nap," she says without making any effort to move her ear away from my chest.

My gaze takes in the sight of her relaxed against me. Darla's hands rest against my stomach. With her legs curled up and feet hidden under a pillow, she looks ready for a nap. Her eyes are too bright though. They stare at me as if I'm the sun and she's been too long in the dark. I catch a smile at the curve of her full lips.

"What did you do after the Navy?" she whispers.

I open my mouth to answer until she takes my left hand and places it on her tit.