“Sad? In what way?”
“There was Crazy Joe, my father-in-law. He lived with us when we were first married, ages ago. We kept him in a room off the attic. Oh, he must have been ninety, maybe one hundred years old, and he would rant and rave about things that weren’t there. Spooks, things like that, as if something were coming to get him, poor dear. And muttering about his younger brother, Gustav, claiming that he wasn’t really his brother at all and that the real Gustav had been stolen away by der Wechselbalgen. Changelings. My husband said it was because of the sister. If I remember, the sister died on the passage over from Germany, and that plunged the whole family into grief. And they never recovered. Even Josef, still imagining spirits after all those years.”
The room began to feel unusually warm, and my stomach churned. My head hurt.
“Let me think, yes, there was the mama, and the papa, another poor man. Abram was his name. And the brothers. I don’t know anything about the older one; he died in the Civil War at Gettysburg. But there was Josef who was a bachelor until he was pushing fifty, and then there’s the idiot brother, the youngest one. Such a sad family.”
“Idiot? What do you mean, idiot?”
“That’s not what they call it nowadays, but back then, that’s what they said. They went on and on about how wonderfully he could play the piano, but it was all a trick of the mind. He was what they would call an idiot savant. Gustav was his name, poor child. Could play like Chopin, Josef claimed, but was otherwise quiet and extremely introverted. Maybe he was autistic, if they had such a thing back then.”
The blood rushed to my head and I began to feel faint.
“Or maybe highly strung. But after the incident with the so-called changelings, he even stopped playing the piano and completely withdrew, never said another word for the rest of his life, and he lived to be an old man, too. They say the father went mad when Gustav stopped playing the music and started to let the world just drift right by. I went out to see him once or twice at the institution, poor dear. You could tell he was thinking something, but Lord only knows. As if he went off to live in his own little world. He died when I was still a young newlywed. That was about 1934, I think, but he looked older than Moses.”
She bent over the photo album and flipped through to the front of the book. She pointed to a middle-aged man in a gray fedora. “There’s my husband, Harry—that’s crazy Joe’s son. He was so old when we married, and I was just a girl.” Then she pointed to a wizened figure who looked as if he was the oldest man in the world. “Gustav.” For a brief moment, I thought that would be me, but then I realized the old man in the photograph was no relation at all. Beneath him there was a scratched image of an elderly woman in a high collar. “La belle dame sans merci. Gone well before my time, but were it not for his mother holding things together, that would have been the end of the Ungerlands. And then we wouldn’t be sitting here today, would we?”
“But,” I stammered, “but how did they manage to go on after so much misfortune?”
“The same way that all of us do. The same way that I went on after losing two husbands and Lord knows all that’s happened. At some point, you have to let go of the past, son. Be open to life to come. Back in the sixties, when everybody was lost, Brian used to talk about going off to find himself. He used to say, ‘Will I ever know the real me? Will I ever know who I am supposed to be?’ Such foolish questions beg straight answers, don’t you think, Henry Day?”
I felt faint, paralyzed, destroyed. I crawled off the sofa, out the front door, all the way home and into bed. If we made our good-byes, they evaporated quickly in the residual shock of her story.
To rouse me from deep slumber the next morning, Tess fixed a pot of hot coffee and a late breakfast of eggs and biscuits, which I devoured like a famished child. I was sapped of all strength and will, confounded by the news of Gustav as an idiot savant. Too many ghosts in the attic. We sat on the veranda in the cool morning, swapping sections of the Sunday newspaper. I pretended to read, but my mind was elsewhere, desperately trying to sort through the possibilities, when a ruckus arose in the neighborhood. Dogs started howling one by one as something passed in front of their homes, a chain reaction of maddening intensity.