Our limbs throbbed like pounding drums.
And then a softness replaced the madness, and Ren scattered feather kisses all over my face as we clung to each other, coming down from our addictive high.
He coughed quietly, making yet more tears swell in my eyes.
Sweet, fuzzy feelings battled with scared, timid things, and I wanted to hug him close and fight every hour, every year and stay right there, together.
Accepting another kiss, I whispered, “Ren…will you do something for me?”
He smiled, dazed and satisfied. “Anything.”
“I want you to see a doc—”
But a knock sounded on the door.
The unlocked door.
And it opened.
And Cassie walked in.
And she saw.
Everything.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
REN
2020
“SHIT.” My hand flew up as if I could stop her mid-step. “Cassie. Out!”
She froze, drinking in the sight of me with my jeans around my thighs, Della sex-mauled and panting in my arms, and our semi-naked bodies joined in a way that needed no explanation.
“Holy shit.” Cassie clamped a hand over her mouth, spinning around. “What the—”
With her back turned, I winced as I disengaged from Della. Stepping back, I dropped her gently to the floor. Once she was steady, I hoisted up my jeans and tucked my still hard flesh into my jeans.
The sound of my zipper and clink of my buckle sent my cheeks blazing, made worse by Della rearranging her underwear and smoothing down her skirt.
Clothes might cover us, but they didn’t stop the raging heartbeats, tangled hair, or swollen lips of what we’d just been doing.
Of all the fucking times.
Of all the fucking places.
I felt as if I’d been skinned alive and every organ left on display. I felt butchered and broken and bruised, and it was all Della’s fault. But I also felt awed and amazed and absolutely stupefied that I hadn’t known what fears lurked inside my heart.
That I’d avoided coming to terms with what we’d done for two years, and it’d taken a stupid bedroom full of our youth to make me snap.
I hated that she’d pushed me.
But I loved her for it too, because I felt lighter than I had…in, well, ever.
I was centred and calm, and I didn’t want a fight with Cassie messing up that special connection that had sprung between Della and me. I wanted to bask in it. I wanted to forget about everyone else for a while and just love her. I needed to reassure her that I was fine and the fear she’d been nursing was completely unfounded.
Dragging shaking hands through my hair, I did my best to put myself back together.
Giving me a guilty look, Della checked me over, found I was marginally suitable for company, then said softly, “You can turn around, Cassie.”
Cassie peered over her shoulder warily, eyes narrowed. For a second, she stared at us, hurt and hating. Then she spun around, her mouth falling wide with shock. A few squeaks came out before she cleared her throat and snapped, “I mean…I suspected something was going on but…to actually know it’s true?” She crossed her arms tight. “I-I don’t know what to say.”
I didn’t want anything to do with this.
I was sorry she’d seen us together, but that was her fault for walking in unannounced.
I was sorry she had to face the truth that I was with Della, but it wasn’t like I was hers. We were kids when we hooked up. It meant nothing.
I cleared my throat, hiding yet another cough. “Cassie, I think you better go— ”
“Wait.” Della held up her hand. “There isn’t anything to say.” She glanced at me before finishing, “We’re together. It’s that simple. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Cas.”
Cassie’s eyes narrowed, flitting to me, then back to Della, then back to me. Her anger only increased. “You’re together? Well, that just makes it all fine and dandy, doesn’t it?” She rolled her eyes. “Don’t you think it’s a little…I dunno? Disgusting to do something like that in your old room? A room where you told me and my family you were brother and sister?”
“That’s in the past.” Della’s face hardened, prepared to take on Cassie in a way that worried me. “It’s none of your business what we do or don’t do in whatever place we choose.”
“It kinda is, seeing as this is my home!”
“It was ours, too!” Della shouted back.
“Yeah, and you were kids!”
“And now we’re not, so get over it!”
Cassie sniffed. “It still doesn’t make it right.”
“I don’t care. I’m not looking for your approval.” Della crossed her arms. “This has nothing to do with you.”
Cassie faced me, her temper zeroing in on me instead. “You promised me when I saw you guys that night in the stable that you hadn’t kissed her before. That you’d never touched her. You stood before my parents and assured us all that there was nothing going on.”
I wanted to leave. The walls were too close. The door too far. But this wasn’t just Della’s fight. It was mine too, and I’d always known we’d have to face it, sooner or later.
Standing taller, I wished I could shed the scent of sex from my skin. “I told the truth. Nothing was going on.” I winced. “Then.”
Cassie pursed her lips, eyes full of storms. “How long?”
Dangerous, dangerous question.
“Two years,” I muttered.
“Two years?” Cassie’s face blanched. “Della…” She looked at her as if her heart was broken.
Della’s own heartbreak painted her features as she shrugged helplessly. “I-I couldn’t tell you. I’m sorry.”
Cassie put up a hand, blocking Della from view as she locked eyes on me. “You expect me to believe you’ve only been fucking her for two years? You guys suddenly vanished into the night. Who’s to say you didn’t do what I just witnessed the minute you were away from here? Who’s to say you weren’t fucking—”
“Don’t you dare accuse me of something I haven’t done.” My jaw clenched with disgust. “What sort of person do you think I am?”
“One who was obviously lying to himself.”
“If you think that low of me, then leave!” I pointed at the door. “Like Della said, this has nothing to do with—”
“He didn’t touch me until I was eighteen.” Della leapt to my defence, standing in front of me like a shield. “He left me, actually. For six months, he put distance between us, but it only showed we’d been running from the truth and couldn’t anymore.”
Cassie cocked her chin, not giving an inch. “The truth about what?”
“The truth that I was in love with her, and she was in love with me.” I growled. “We didn’t plan it. Believe me, I tried to fight it. But…she’s mine. So, are we done here?”
Silence fell.
Tempers cooled a little, only for Cassie to turn her attention back on Della and fire up all over again. “It still doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t tell me.”
“Well, we’re telling you now.” I did my best to keep my patience. “We’re together and engaged and—”
“Wait. What?” Her skin whitened. “Oh, my God. You’re engaged?” Cassie shook her head. “And you didn’t think I deserved to know? You didn’t think my friendship valued a heads up? You didn’t think our past, Ren, gave me some sort of right to know?”
“Our past meant nothing. We fooled around, that’s all.”
Cassie pressed a fist to her heart. “Wow, Ren. Just wow.”
Regret swamped me. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? I just meant, Della was always—”
“Yours.” Her eyes glossed. “I get it. Can’t say I’m even surprised. There was always something more between you two. Sleeping in the same bed? Joined at the hip all the time? It wasn’t normal.” She rolled her eyes. “Dad told me to let it go, that you’d both had a rough start to life, and it was understandable that you’d found family in each other and overcompensated…but I always had my suspicions.”