I threw a hard overhand right and watched the bag shake until it stopped.
I have what I want. I want Jada Stanley. Fuck everything else.
I pulled my gloves off, my moment of clarity more like a moment of acceptance of the things I already knew, and picked up my phone.
Me: I miss you. Hope you’ve had a good night.
Jada: Just got into bed.
Me: I should be with you.
Jada: You know where to find me.
I smiled as I felt a pull overcome me to do just that: find her and never let her go.
Soon.
Me: I’m working on AH tonight. I have a few things I have to get worked out by Monday.
Jada: I heard Max talking about that. He said it was going to be the death of him.
I chuckled.
Me: He’s just wanting sympathy.
Jada: LOL
Me: I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you. I’ll try to come by tomorrow, if that’s okay?
Jada: I’d love that. I miss you.
Me: Goodnight.
Jada: Goodnight <3
Me: Heart.
JADA
“You look like hell,” Kari observed the next morning, giving me a once over and wrinkling her nose. She walked into the kitchen, her teal and cream robe wrapped tightly against her. Her hair was pulled into a messy bun and I could tell that Max was lurking around somewhere.
I picked at my toast. “Thanks.”
I hadn’t been able to sleep the night before, a kaleidoscope of images shuffling through my dreams keeping me awake. Memories of Decker at the harbor, Cane on the mountain, my drive to Arizona all rotated, interchanged, and replaced each other into a twisted, jumbled mess.
And that’s exactly how I felt, sitting at the table and watching Kari pour herself a cup of coffee … like a twisted and jumbled mess. Why can’t I be more like Kari? Controlled, determined, put together.
I was none of those things; I couldn’t even keep my damn dreams straight. It was the story of my life. I would think I had something figured out and then I would see it was all a ruse or wishful thinking.
Kari sat down across the table and picked up the newspaper. “Let’s do something today,” she said, undoubtedly looking for the travel section. “I want to do something fun.”
Max sauntered into the room, a pair of wrinkled jeans hanging off of his hips. He broke stride for a half a second to scan my face, before heading to the coffee pot. “You want to do something today? Let’s go to Pinnacle Peak.”
“Yeah, let’s not,” I said, giving him a look.
Kari’s eyes shot up in stark contrast to mine. “Yes! I love Pinnacle Peak!”
Max shook his head at Kari before turning to look at me. “Do you have something better to do, Ms. Stanley?”
“No, actually I don’t. Cane said he may come by today, not that I’m holding my breath at this point.” I wrapped my white robe around me tighter, trying to somehow protect myself from disappointment.
“Why are you so grumpy today?” Kari asked, taking a sip of her coffee.
“I don’t know. I just am.”
“Tell you what,” Max said, “give Cane a call and see what his plans are today. I think you both need some sunshine and I need some exercise.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t want to go.”
“You need to go. So go get your ass ready.” Max looked to Kari. “Asses. Both of you.”
“And to think I liked you when I first met you. Funny,” I commented, getting up from the table. “But you are right, as much as I hate to admit it. I do need to get out of this house to somewhere other than work. So let me call Cane so he can tell me he’s busy and then I’ll be ready. Give me twenty minutes.”
“That’s the spirit!” Kari exclaimed. Her exuberance was a little more than I could handle.
I headed to my room and sat on the chair by the window.
If I call Cane, he’ll say he can’t see me today and I’ll have to pretend it doesn’t matter. Or I can just text him and save face.
Nodding at my decision, I pulled up his text box.
Me: Max wants to take Kari and me to Pinnacle Peak today for a hike. What are the odds you may come by?
I chewed on a nail, waiting for his response to come in. It took a few minutes before I heard the ping.
Cane: I have a couple of meetings today, so if I do get a chance, it’ll be this evening. Why don’t you go ahead with Max?
Me: Will do.
Cane: I’ll see you soon, okay?
Me: Okay. Xo
I waited for a return message, but it didn’t come. With a heavy heart, I pulled on a pair of yoga pants, a yellow and grey striped t-shirt, and some sneakers and went back downstairs; Kari and Max were waiting by the front door.
“Let’s get this over with.” My voice was decidedly less enthusiastic as it had been a few moments before. Having Cane bail on me again took the wind out of my sails.
We made our way out the front door and to his truck. He drove a black on black Ford F-150 that was all jacked up; it was pretty formidable.