“That’s so hard to imagine,” I said sarcastically.
“I know. It’s almost impossible to believe. Anyway, my dad boxed a little his whole life. I think he may have been pretty decent, but it wasn’t something he ever talked about. He had a heavy bag that hung in the garage and he got me to focus my energy on that in my teenage years. I loved it. I spent hours in the garage, working shit out in my mind by hitting the leather.”
“You talk about it like you love it.”
“Yeah, I feel really free when I’m at the bag. You can just be you. The bag doesn’t care who you are or how you feel or if it is right or wrong,” he shrugged. “It just stands in front of you and takes whatever you throw at it without judgment.”
“I don’t want to keep you from anything. If you need to work or whatever, that’s fine.”
“Hush, woman,” he said, clicking on the television and pulling me in close. “What do you like to watch?”
“Whatever you want,” I said, snuggling into his chest, thinking that it didn’t matter as long as I was next to him. “I don’t watch a lot of TV.”
“Yeah, I don’t either,” he said, shutting it off. “I think it’s a waste of time usually.”
“Time is a precious thing.”
“That it is.” He pulled me closer into him and I breathed in the scent that was Cane, a smell that was quickly making me feel at home. “Life really does just fly by. You have to reach out and take what you want or else it will be over before you know it.”
“What do you want out of life, Cane?” I felt him still so I scrambled for a better way to put it. “Where do you want to be in five years?”
He pursed his lips together, his brows furrowing. “I’m not sure,” he said, clearly mystified by my question. “Is it bad that I don’t think I’ve ever really looked that far into the future?”
“No, I guess not.”
“I’ve never thought about it before but I didn’t care. Each day was a day to get through. There was really no point in looking any farther unless it was something for work. But now that I think of it, I have been thinking ahead a little more, wondering what we will do a few days from now, what we will do next weekend. But five years is a lot different than a few days.”
He sat quietly, pondering my question. “Where do you see yourself in five years, Jada?”
“I’m not sure. I had thought I would have a home of my own, complete with a little white picket fence. I figured I would be sharing my life with someone, starting a family maybe. But obviously that got blown out of the water.”
A hint of sadness wiggled its way inside my chest. The dreams I had for my life since I was a little girl seemed so far out of reach. I was afraid I would never be able to grasp what I wanted out of life.
“You can still have that.”
“Yeah, I guess. I don’t really even know. My life has changed so much.”
“Life gets better with change.”
“Sometimes,” I said, considering his words. “But sometimes it doesn’t.”
“Look at me,” he said, smiling nervously. “I changed the way I live. And if I hadn’t, you never would have had me. Change is good.” He ran his fingers up my arm. “I didn’t plan it, but you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. Do you know that?”
“Oh, Cane,” I said, his words causing me to choke up. “I don’t even know what to say to that.”
“You could say you feel the same way,” he said, shrugging his shoulders casually, making me grin.
“I do feel that way.”
Cane wrapped one arm around my waist. “I haven’t felt this content in a long time. Probably since my dad died.”
“What was he like?”
His chest fell quickly as he blew out a breath.
“I’m sorry. You don’t have to answer that.”
“No. I want you to know me.” His hand stilled and cupped my waist, pressing my body against his, like he was afraid I was going to pull away. “My dad was a great dad. He was reliable, even-keeled. And he was the hardest worker I’ve ever known. He wanted me to step up at Alexander Industries—to really throw myself into it.”
“You seemed to have done that.”
Cane stilled. “I was dating a girl after college named Ashley. She moved back to Providence. I thought I loved her.” I could feel him shake his head. “Anyway, Dad wanted me to stay here and I didn’t. I just followed her across the country.”
“That’s kind of romantic.”
He snorted. “That’s all kinds of fucking stupid, that’s what it is. So I get there and see the real her. She’s around her family, her friends, and she isn’t the girl I thought I knew. I complained about it to Dad and he wanted me to come home. He was looking at this property in Queen Creek to buy to build a subdivision on and he said he needed my help. Well, one night Ashley and I went to a bar and some things happened and I realized I had made the wrong choice. So I called him up that night, it was a Saturday, and told him I was coming home.”