Stolen Course (Wrecked and Ruined #2)

It’s been three weeks, and with the exception of ‘can you pass the salt’ conversation, we don’t even speak. It’s awkward at best. I’ve cried myself to sleep more times than I can even count over the last few weeks, and if it weren’t for Sarah, I would be gone. Hunter wants me to come home. Even Alex asked me to move back. I can’t leave again though. He might have been able to leave me, but I won’t take his child away from him. No matter how much he doesn’t want it. Caleb may not be on my list of favorites right now, but I’ll still love him eternally. I don’t even have a choice about that.

I’m not used to these feelings of insecurity and vulnerability. I’ve never been like this about a man before. I’ve also never been pregnant before either. It’s more than that though. Pregnancy might be expanding the seven hundred emotions, but they all have the same origin—a gorgeous man who’s covered in tattoos and has the most brilliant blue eyes I’ve ever seen. The man who made me want to fight for forever. The same man who is too preoccupied to even realize that I’m still fighting for us.

Caleb stays gone almost every night until ten or eleven p.m. I was really worried at first, until one night when I was driving home from Kara’s house and saw his truck sitting at the cemetery. And because insecurity is not a pretty color on me, I drove past and checked the following three nights in a row. He is always there. I don’t want to be jealous. I said that I would always respect his past, but watching him run to her tears me open. I have given myself a million pep talks in the mirror about how strong I am and how every single moment of this self-imposed separation from Caleb shouldn’t be complete agony. I don’t need him…right? But no matter how hard I try, I can’t lie to myself. This is absolute hell.

As my eight a.m. alarm begins buzzing in my ear, I silently beg for the clock to turn back an hour. I need to get up and meet with a Realtor. Jesse found a lead on a building near Nell’s, the coffee shop where she used to work. I need a studio so I can really expand my business. But damn, I’m exhausted. I fell asleep fully dressed last night after a four-hour-long photo shoot for the local college. I hit the snooze button, but as soon as I doze back off, my phone begins to ring.

“May I please speak to Emma Erickson?”

“That’s me,” I say, desperately wanting to roll back over and go to sleep.

“Hi, Emma. This is Lynn, Dr. Parker’s nurse. I was wondering if you would be able to come in this morning for an ultrasound?”

“Huh?” I ask, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from my eyes. “Why this morning? My next appointment isn’t for another week.”

“Yes, I’m aware. However, your blood work we took last week has a few unexpected markers. I’m sure it’s nothing, but we would love if you could come in and let us take a look at your baby. You haven’t had an ultrasound in several weeks. We would like to check on the baby’s heart now instead of waiting until your twenty-week appointment.”

“Oh, God. Is something wrong?” I question as fear consumes me.

“No, I’m not saying that at all. All I am saying is your blood work came back with a few abnormalities. We would like you to come in this morning so we can talk a quick peek and make sure everything is okay.” Her words do nothing to reassure me.

Numbness overtakes my body. This may not be the most expected pregnancy, but I unquestionably love my baby, and I know somewhere deep down Caleb does too. My heart begins to race as I rub my small bulge. My mind frantically tries to think of every possible outcome, but I feel like I’m in the dark. I don’t even know what ‘markers’ are, but based on this phone call, I know they terrify me.

“I’ll be there as soon as possible.”





I ARRIVE home, walking on cloud freaking eleven (nine isn’t even high enough today). I’m still mad at Caleb, and I hate that he wasn’t there for me again today, but I didn’t feel comfortable enough to ask him to come to the appointment with me. I was too scared that he would say no. I couldn’t handle his rejecting me this morning, so I went alone instead. Apparently, those ‘markers’ the nurse mentioned on the phone were indicators of several possible birth defects. I can’t thank God enough that they didn’t tell me that until after they told me that our baby looked okay. However, the sense of relief I felt in that moment still has me reeling. So what did I do? I went out and spent a hundred bucks on groceries and cooked a huge-ass steak dinner to celebrate.

When Caleb walks in, I could care less that he is still a selfish prick. I just want some company at my party.

“Hey!” I shout across the loud music blasting from my iPad.

“What are you doing?” he asks, obviously bewildered.

“Dancing!” I spin in a circle that would have had him laughing his ass off weeks ago.

“Well, can you turn it down? I need to do some work and get some sleep,” he replies, absolutely dumbfounding me.

“What happened to you?” I snap in his direction. “Where did the funny guy that I fell in love with go? You are always just a fucking dick now, Caleb.”