“Hey baby girl, how's it going with Mr Fuck me right now please? Jo said he's a bit of a player, just bear that in mind, and don’t do anything just out of revenge because you’re pissed off with Jason” she looks me right in the eye as she speaks. Then we both look across at Gabriel standing at the bar and the girl standing next to him, twirling her hair through her fingers, and talking to him animatedly.
“What am I doing Jem? I should go home and try and sort my marriage out, not stand here talking to The Mornington Peninsula's shagger of the year”
“Don’t you fucking dare” she says way too loudly, heads turn and look at us, Jemma's oblivious
“You are going to stay right here, let him hit on you, buy you drinks, then, then you go home, remembering all the flattering bull shit that he will doubtless come up with.You remember that this God like man, boy, whore, spent the night trying to get into your knickers, then you go home and dream about all the different ways you would like him to fuck you, dream about him all night long while that bastard snores next to you, then when you wake up, you pack your bags and you get the fuck out of there and don’t look back. You’re doing no harm to anyone, just standing here talking to a friend of a friend, you have nothing to feel guilty about, remember that, it's not you that has done anything wrong! Now, we are popping out for a smoke, you coming?” she asks, I shake my head smiling.
“Thanks Jem but I just feel like a desperate old moll, he probably thinks he's onto a sure thing, that I'll just be grateful for any attention he sends my way and that I will gladly go home with him, and do you know what Jem? I’m that sad and that fucking lonely right now, if he asked, I might actually consider it”
“Yeah well, I don’t blame you, I mean look at him Loz, he is gorgeous and your husbands a prick, not a hard decision is it really?”
“Jemma, you’re supposed to talk sense into me, not encourage me to cheat on my husband”
“Lauren, think about it, go home to an arshole who throws you about in the wrong way, or go home with a super stud, who will throw you about in the right way? But I know you and I know you would never be able to sleep with him and then go home to Jay, so, leave Jay tomorrow morning and fuck the hottie tomorrow night, no problems, no guilt involved” She smiles at me.
“Thanks for the advice, if only it was all that easy, and no I'll pass on the smoke thanks, I'm gonna drink this drink and go”
We smile at each other and I see that look I've been dreading in her eyes, she feels sorry for me, it’s a look of pity. I force the tears back. That look right there is the reason I have never told her or anyone else what’s been going on.
“Don’t Jem, please don’t give me that look” I shake my head.
“Lauren, I’m sorry, I just feel so bad that I didn’t work out what was happening”
She gives me a hug.
“Right, I’m going for a smoke, and if going home is what you want to do, that’s fine, but please be sure that it is what you wanna do, you can come to mine, remember that. But let’s have a boogie before we go, you know that always cheers you up, then I will jump in a cab with you”
She gives me a peck on the cheek as Gabe returns with the drinks, he hands me mine then leans back against the table grabbing my hand as he does, pulling me against him. The band is singing an old Pretenders song and he sings into my ear about imagining that he’s there when I go to sleep. Bloody hell! The feel of his breath on me, the words of the song, the smell of his after shave or is it shower wash? I don’t know it’s just his scent, all of these things make me think, if he wants to bend me over the bar right this second, I will probably do it. I seriously need to pull myself together, I am not a stupid teenager, hanging on to a bloke’s every word, so why am I acting like that’s exactly what I am? I take a deep breath and look up into his face as I put my hand over his chest, between us, intending to push myself away from him. I can feel his heart beating hard and I hesitate, just for a beat and he puts his hand over mine.
“Can you feel that?” he asks “it's been going mad like that since you walked in here tonight, from the moment I set eyes on you, all I wanted to do is talk to you. I don't do this, you need to know that, if I'm interested in a woman I might buy her a drink, I will take her home, and I will fuck her and then I will leave. I don’t sleep over, I don’t make small talk, I don't stand around chatting and finding out what she likes, fuck Lauren, sometimes I don’t even know their names, and I don't do relationships”
Why is he telling me this? Obviously, I have got him all wrong; he’s not such a nice bloke after all. He is in fact just another arrogant prick. Right, that's it I'm going...
I shake my head at him...
“So, what? Am I supposed to be impressed or grateful for that little revelation?”
I ask sarcastically. Okay I was wrong, he is a complete dick after all! I need to leave.