“I was dealing with the pipe in the kitchen. It’s leaking again.”
She shifted awkwardly. “Oh. Did you fix it?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, good. Thanks.”
He acknowledged that with a nod.
Silence fell, long and agonizing, as they sat there staring straight ahead.
There were so many things she wanted to say to him, but she was having trouble making her vocal cords work. Talking to Sloan didn’t used to be this hard. She could always tell him whatever was on her mind. The good, the bad, the terrifying. Sloan was the only person who’d seen her at her most vulnerable, the only person in this messed-up world who she was able to show that side of herself to.
Fuck, why had he kissed her? Why had he opened that door? They’d kept it under lock and key for a good reason, damn it.
She took a breath, forcing herself to say something.
“I was wrong—”
“You were right—”
Their startled gazes collided as they both spoke and halted at the same time.
“What?” she said stupidly.
“You were right,” Sloan repeated.
“Right about what?”
He rubbed his beard, and Reese shivered again, remembering how those sexy bristles had abraded her skin when his mouth had devoured hers the other day. His blistering kisses had left red marks on her cheeks, her neck, her collarbone.
“I needed to stay behind,” Sloan told her, his tone rueful.
“No. I was wrong. You needed to be with me.” She gestured to her arm. “This wouldn’t have happened if you’d been there watching my back. And yes, it’s only a silly cut, but . . . it didn’t feel right being out in the field without you.”
He gave a steadfast shake of his head. “I needed to be here in Foxworth. Goddamn Enforcers showed up, sweetheart.”
Her breath hitched. “Shit.”
“They searched the town again. Nobody else would’ve been able to handle that, Reese. And they wouldn’t have believed the story we fed them if it had come from anyone other than me. They’ve been monitoring us for years. They know I’m your shadow, that if you were planning an attack, you’d make sure I was by your side.” Grudgingly, he said, “It was a smart move on your part, going without me.”
“It didn’t feel smart when we were at that outpost. It felt . . . unbalanced. Like I was missing a limb.” She sighed. “You’re my right hand.”
“And you’re mine.”
Her heart sped up when Sloan took her hand and threaded their fingers together.
“But sometimes hands need to work independently of each other,” he went on. “And that’s okay. They can each be doing their own thing, as long as they recognize that they’re stronger together.”
She laughed. “Well, aren’t you poetic this morning.”
“What can I say? You bring out that side in me.”
Reese lowered her gaze to their joined hands. His fingers were long and masculine, his hand so much stronger than hers. Her fingers looked downright fragile laced through his.
“We need to talk about the kiss,” she whispered.
“We don’t have to.”
“Yes, we do.” She squeezed his knuckles. “We don’t avoid things, you and I. Well, except for . . . that one thing.”
He snorted. “Yeah. That one thing.”
Silence fell between them.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you,” he finally said, his voice thick with remorse. “You didn’t want it.”
“I . . . I did want it. Fuck, Sloan . . . I’ve always wanted you. You had to have known that.”
There was a sharp intake of breath.
“It’s true,” she said quietly. “When I first met you and Jake on the road, I honestly can’t say which one of you I thought was more attractive. Jake, with his lopsided smile and all that golden hair. Or you, so big and powerful, with that intense stare that saw right through me.” Her hand lifted to his face to stroke his beard. When she rubbed her thumb over his lower lip, he inhaled again. “But Jake made the first move.”
Sloan nodded. “I know. That’s why I backed off.” He swept his fingers over her knuckles in a tender caress. “I set aside my lust and disappointment and tried to be the best friend I could be for you. I wasn’t mad that you picked him, sweetheart. Jake’s star shone bright.”
“But I wanted both of you. Not just him.”
The sadness in his expression was unmistakable. “You never said anything.”
“I did.”
His eyes narrowed.
“I said something to Jake,” she clarified. Pain sliced through her. “The night before Cassie was attacked.”
“Before he attacked Cassie,” Sloan corrected flatly.
“Right.” She swallowed the massive lump in her throat.