Letting out a tired sigh, I grabbed my phone and headed upstairs. A shower and a change of clothes were what I needed. No, actually, a change of scenery was what I needed. If I stayed home, there was no telling what would be going through my mind.
After everything that had happened in the past two weeks, the pull to cut was all-consuming, more so than usual. It was a way for me to feel clean, like every cut made me less like John. Not cutting and letting the blood run out made me feel tainted. I didn’t like that malicious feeling in the back of my mind at all hours of the day, but it was something I’d gotten used to over the years. But recently, it’d grown. I’d let it take over too much of my life. I wanted to avoid it, make it go away, but it seemed almost impossible.
Entering my room, I went straight to my closet, stripped off my suit and exchanged it for a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt. It was only six-thirty in the evening, so I hoped Luke wasn’t busy, since he was my destination.
“Hey, man,” Luke answered after the second ring. “What’s up?”
“You home?”
“Yeah, why?” he asked raggedly. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he was preoccupied.
“Do you have company?”
I could hear faint moaning and I chuckled. If anyone else answered the phone while they were fucking, I’d find it odd, but this was something Luke had done on many occasions.
“Yeah,” he stated, breathing heavily. “Did you want to share?”
I laughed.
“You know me better than that, Luke. If I’m going to fuck, I don’t share.”
Luke didn’t respond, but by the sound of his heavy breathing, he was nearing the end.
“Finish up and get her out. I’m on my way over,” I yelled to him with a smile and hung up.
*
Unlike me, Luke lived in the city. It was ideal for him, though, since he still maintained his party lifestyle, and I didn’t see that changing anytime soon.
When I arrived at his apartment building, I was announced to Luke by the front desk and made my way up the elevator. I was uneasy and with everything that’d been going on, it should’ve come as no surprise, but it wasn’t usual for me.
I knocked on Luke’s door and in matter of moments, it was pulled open.
Luke greeted me with a smile. “Come on in.” He walked away toward the living room. Dressed in gym shorts and a plain white tee, the only indication he’d had company earlier was his hair being a mess. Closing the door, I followed in behind him. “So,” he said, resting back on his brown leather couch. “What brings you to my place? Are you doing all right?”
I frowned at his questions and knew what he was referring to. I hated hearing that concerned tone in his voice.
“Everything’s fine. Just needed to get the fuck out of mine,” I responded as I sat down on the other end of the couch. “A man can’t come visit a friend?”
Luke laced his fingers together and brought them back behind his head. “Yeah, man,” he said with a shrug. “But not you. What’s up?”
I let out a sigh. This wasn’t the norm. I never just dropped by, but I had to get out. These were the times I went out to my usual hunting grounds and picked up women. It was what I’d always done. I was changing my own habits, and it was fucking with my head.
“I just have a lot on my mind,” I stated, meeting his gaze before I let my eyes drift to the family pictures he had hanging on the wall to the left, opposite the expansion of windows. “Sitting alone just makes me think too much.”
“You need to get laid, man.” Luke laughed as he sat up and grabbed the game remote that was sitting beside him.
I chuckled and shook my head. “You have no idea.”
“Here,” he said tossing me a remote. “If you’re here, you play.”
I looked down at the black controller. I’d never played a day in my life. “I have no idea what the fuck this is.”
Luke held up his. “This is for moving your guy. This,” he pointed, “is for shooting, and this is for reloading.”
I glanced back down at the remote. It seemed easy enough.
“What are we playing?” I asked, looking up at his seventy-inch screen.
“Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare. You got shit on your mind? This will take care of it. Nothing beats guns and gore after a long, hard day.”
This wasn’t exactly how I’d planned on spending my night, but it was better than the alternative.
After a few tries, I finally got the hang of it and the hours flew by. I was in my fighting zone when my phone vibrated in my back pocket. Having to use the restroom anyway, I stood up and pulled the phone out as I started walking. But once I saw who was texting me, I stopped in my tracks to reply.
Rachel: I’m at your place. I’ll be waiting.
Me: I’m on my way.
Ten
Mason
“Everything all right?”
I turned to see Luke had pressed pause and was looking at me with concern.
“Yeah, but I need to go. Rachel just sent me a text. She’s at my place.”
“John’s Rachel? At your apartment?”
“Yeah.”
Luke shook his head and let out a laugh. “I don’t know how you do it, man. She’s a lying, cheating bitch.”