‘I promise.’
Sodar nodded. ‘Then take Mercy, Annev. But don’t use it again until we better understand the type of magic you possess.’ Annev took the blade back from Sodar. The priest quickly moved to the table and retrieved the hand-axe. ‘In the midst of our excitement, we’ve forgotten Sraon’s present.’ He passed the axe to Annev.
Taking the axe in his left hand, Annev examined the tough rawhide case belted to its blade. He undid the buckle. The craftsmanship of the blade equalled that of the shortsword but was more intricate; geometric stars and diamonds had been carved into the flat of the axe-head, creating a decorative pattern that also gave the weapon a lighter heft.
‘It’s beautiful.’
‘Yes, it is. Sraon put a lot of work into it. He won’t tell me how much, but I’m certain he started it before winter. It’s a remarkable gift.’
Annev gave it a practice swing. ‘Can I spar with it?’
Sodar nodded. ‘Keep the guard on the blade. I’d rather not have you chopping my legs out from under me.’
Annev smiled. ‘I haven’t beaten you yet.’
‘You’re getting closer.’
Annev shook his head. ‘I’m nearly top of my class … but whenever I spar with you, I feel like you’re humouring me.’
‘I just enjoy taunting you. You would qualify as a weaponsmaster in almost any small village – and a journeyman or man-at-arms in any midsized town. You understand the principles, you just lack experience.’ He indicated Annev’s bruised face for emphasis. ‘How many of them were there?’
The question caught Annev off guard, but he found he couldn’t lie about the fight with Fyn.
‘Four.’
‘Go on.’
‘Fyn had kali sticks. Even then, I think I could have beaten him, but …’
‘But not all of them?’
‘No.’
The priest and the boy sat in silence.
‘Sodar,’ Annev said, after a long moment staring at the ground. ‘You mentioned my parents … and their magic.’ Sodar winced and Annev’s stomach lurched, but he carried on. ‘I thought you didn’t know who my parents were.’
Sodar’s lips moved as if he wanted to speak but his voice had failed him.
He knew them, Annev realised, bile rising. Gods. His conversation with Arnor was just a fraction of what he’s kept from me. He’s lied to me my whole life. All the feelings of hurt and betrayal, all the anger and frustration, came rushing back. What else has he hidden? What other lies has he told?
‘How do you know my parents?’ Annev repeated. His breathing had become rapid and shallow. ‘Are they alive? Are they in Luqura?’
Sodar stood up. ‘Annev. Don’t—’
‘Did they really give me up, or was I stolen? That’s what some of the ancients said – that we were born to unfit parents and the Academy took us away to serve as avatars.’ He looked up at Sodar, eyes wide. ‘Is that what happened? Which version is true?’
‘Annev,’ Sodar began, choosing his words carefully. ‘Don’t ask about your parents.’
‘But why not?’ Annev shouted, tears spilling down his cheeks. ‘If you know who they are, why can’t you tell me? Why keep lying to me?’
Sodar studied Annev’s face for a long moment, then lingered on the boy’s prosthetic arm. His gaze wandered to the sword on the table, and some of the tension went out of him. Sodar walked back, sat down in his chair, and clasped his hands in front of his face as if he were praying. After a moment, he looked up.
‘Sometimes lies can protect us, and truths can kill us. Given the choice between the two, which would you prefer?’
Annev wiped the tears from his cheeks and eyes. ‘I don’t understand.’
‘Then take a breath and think.’
The curt reply made Annev stop and consider his next answer. He swallowed, reining in his emotions. ‘My arm is a lie that protects me,’ he said. ‘If the ancients ever found out, they would kill me. But the truth is that I’m …’
Crippled? Deformed?
‘That I have only one arm,’ he said, forcing the words out. ‘That I’m … not whole. That is the truth. My disability makes me a Son of Keos, and it can get me killed.’
‘And you have magic.’
‘Which makes me twice cursed.’
Sodar shook his head. ‘Magic is a blessing that few possess. Be grateful for it. Your arm is also a blessing. In his mercy, Odar has given you a trial to overcome, and that challenge will make you stronger.’
‘It is still a truth that can get me killed,’ Annev said. ‘That’s what you’re trying to say.’
Sodar tapped the sheathed sword on the table. ‘Your whole life has been a series of lies meant to keep you safe, Annev. You lie to the ancients about your arm and your magical affinity. They lie about who you are, where you came from, and what you are doing here.’
‘And who do you lie to?’
Annev regretted the question the moment he said it, but he couldn’t take it back, and when Sodar hesitated he found himself genuinely curious as to how the priest would answer.
‘I lie to everyone,’ Sodar said, his tone entirely unapologetic.
Annev was unsurprised by the priest’s words yet still shocked by Sodar’s admssion. ‘If I asked you now,’ Annev asked, ‘would you tell me the truth?’
The priest hesitated. ‘No.’
‘Why not?’ Annev demanded.
‘Because I won’t let you get hurt, Annev! I won’t …’ He stopped. ‘I won’t let it happen again.’
‘Let what happen again?’ With every question, Annev felt more and more confused, as if he were spiralling into deep, dark waters. ‘Tell me,’ Annev repeated, seizing control of his emotions. ‘I’m your student … your friend. I deserve to know. What are you hiding?’
Sodar shook his head, eyes pleading. ‘Not tonight, Annev. It is too much. Not tonight.’
Annev steadied himself with a great gulp of air. So many secrets. So many lies. Why should he believe anything the priest told him? Why should he believe Sodar would ever tell him the truth?
‘We need to prepare for Regaleus,’ Annev said slowly, his face still flushed with anger. He swept the sword and axe from the table. When Sodar nodded his agreement, Annev looked sharply at him, holding his gaze. ‘But this conversation isn’t over.’
Chapter Twenty-Two
The evening bell tolled as the villagers began to crowd into Sodar’s tiny chapel. Farmers, shopkeepers, tradesmen and master avatars all wished each other a Happy Regaleus. Soon the benches had all been filled except for the two at the very front, and it was standing room only.