“Sorry. I think of you as better, I guess.”
He gives me a little nod then sighs. “I don’t want you to leave town, but I can’t tell you what’s right for you. I can say you shouldn’t make any decisions when you’re tired and upset. You’ll make a stupid choice. So if you want my advice, go to sleep and make your decision when you feel more like you.”
“Makes sense.”
I lean my head against his bare shoulder while we watch a show about Alaska’s history.
“Tell me one thing,” he asks after we’ve bored ourselves for ten minutes. “Are you upset tonight because of me or you?”
“Me,” I whisper.
Ford nods and gives me a sideways glance. “Ready to sleep? I’ll leave the TV on.”
After we scoot under the blankets, I stare at him while he stares back at me. We’re both tired. I’m sad and I sense he isn’t very happy either. His shirt feels warm against my skin, but I want to be closer. I remember my dream and how lost I felt. I need to be connected to the here and now.
I take his hand and slide it under the shirt. “I’m cold.”
Ford doesn’t smile. His eyes are exhausted. His hand responds to my words though, moving upward to my right breast. I’m not really aroused in a sexual way, but I want him closer. I hunger to feel less like me than an extension of Ford.
His lips finding mine, he kisses me slowly. Soon he’s inside me, but we’re not really fucking. More than sex, our bodies share warmth and acceptance. My nightmare feels a million years ago. Now, I only see Ford and he’s all I dream.
22
Shay
Clusterfuck
The sun can’t penetrate Ford’s dark curtains. I only see hints of light at the window’s corners. Struggling to sit up, I glance at the DVR to check the time. It’s already ten and I’m sleeping like a woman with nowhere to go and not a responsibility in the world.
I look at my left and find Ford gone. Sighing, I roll out of bed and dig out a pair of clean panties and sweat shorts from my bag. I leave on his shirt because it’s warm, comfy, and his.
After a trip to the restroom to make myself presentable, I look for Ford. He’s at a little kitchen table, drinking coffee. Pax stands at the counter, drinking too. They both look at me expressionless when I enter the room.
Pax smiles first. “Nice shirt. Just great.”
Ford rolls his eyes then walks to the coffee pot. He pours a cup then places it on the table next to him.
“Pax made a donut run earlier. Come and enjoy his generosity.”
Sitting next to Ford, I smell the fresh coffee. He watches me for a minute then focuses on his brother.
“Would it be rude to ask you to go away?”
“Better hope you never need a kidney, alchie.”
Ford grins as Pax stomps to the back deck with Folgers. Biting into one of the donuts, I moan quietly at the freshness of the glazed slice of heaven. Ford glances at me and I think he wants to fuck. The look in his eyes makes me uneasy.
“I’ve never had fresh donuts before,” I say.
“Living the dream, huh?”
“Are you angry?”
“No, you’ll know when I’m pissed. Trust me.”
Shrugging, I return to my donut. Ford eats one too then washes his hands. When he returns to the table, his damp fingers dive straight into my hair. His lips are on mine and I’m glad I manage to swallow in time.
“You look really fucking hot in my shirt.”
“Not surprising since you look hot in them too. I think they’re magical shirts.”
Ford moves me over to his lap and I find him hard against my leg.
“You were waiting patiently for me to wake up,” I say, caressing his face. “You’re such a gentleman.”
Growling, Ford slides his hand up my shirt and pinches my left nipple. “Have you eaten enough? Drank enough coffee?”
“I want to fuck,” I whisper in his ear.
Ford jumps up as if someone set off a firecracker in his ass. I’m in his arms as he rushes to the bedroom and kicks the door shut. My clothes come off faster than his and he cusses at his jeans for giving him trouble. On my knees, I bounce around on the bed and watch him struggle. It’s a helluva sight.
After he gets the first fuck out of the way, I explore all his hard flesh. My lips and fingers tease while he rests with an arm behind his head.
“Where do you work out?” I ask, just to hear him speak.
“Gym on the bottom floor.”
Taking his hard cock in my hands, I whisper, “Can I work out there so I can be big and strong like you?”
“I can’t handle a conversation right now, Shay.”
“Ahh, you remembered my name. I guess you still have a little blood left in your big head.”