He scrambles to catch it, giving me the finger once he does.
I start to scale back down.
Halfway there, my left foot slips, my fingers going white-knuckled against the stones in order to hold my weight, but I can hear Charlie below, murmuring, “Easy, easy,” and, “I’ve got you,” and I know he does.
When I get to the bottom, I turn to Charlie and Ruby.
“How does it look?”
“Come see,” Ruby says, beckoning me toward them.
I look up at the tunnel’s exit, and there around the circular rim, in all lowercase cursive letters, is my message to the world—not Finn’s, not Charlie’s, not my parents’, but mine.
I grab my phone and snap a picture to send to Finn.
And then I stand next to my brother and my friend, all of us looking at the words I’ve written, the ones I never thought I could, my heart beating as steady as the flap of wings:
fly fly fly
Acknowledgments
A MILLION THANKS TO . . .
Steven Leder, for offering feedback on an early version of this manuscript and also just for being my brother.
The rest of the Leders—Jack (you’re first in this list!), Clara, Pat, Jim, and Tina—for having my back no matter what.
My agent, Michael Bourret, for his unflappable calm and constant support.
Lauren Abramo, for helping share my words in different parts of the world.
Liesa Abrams, for her clear and steady wisdom every step of the way.
Sarah McCabe, the Em to this book’s Parker, who knew what I wanted to do with it before I did.
Jessi Smith, for her invaluable insights into what made Parker and Charlie tick.
The rest of the Simon Pulse and Riveted Lit team: Mara Anastas, Elizabeth Mims, Russell Gordon, Katherine Devendorf, Lauren Hoffman, Catherine Hayden, Amy Hendricks, Anna Jarzab, Janine Perez, Penina Lopez, Erica Stahler, Rebecca Vitkus, and Jodie Hockensmith.
Cam Montgomery and Meghan Hopkins, for their willingness to teach and guide.
Kathleen Glasgow, for her generosity and her always-luminous words.
Jen of Pop! Goes the Reader, Patty of Bookish Wanderlove, Emma of Miss Print, Nicole of Nicole’s Novel Reads, Tiff of Mostly YA Lit, and all the other amazing and dedicated bloggers out there whose love for books encourages anxious writers like me to keep creating.
Jenny Clark, Meredith Dros, Chris Dufault, Tara Felleman, Lance Fitzgerald, Shannon Kelly, Nancy Lambert, P. J. Mark, Holly McGhee, Dolores McMullan, Jake Morrissey, Patrick Nolan, Caitlin O’Shaughnessy, Micol Ostrow, Vim Pasupathi, Steven Reese, Rebecca Reiss, Pippa Wright, my colleagues at Penguin Books, the Sweet 16s, and all my other friends, for their words and acts of encouragement, from leaving flowers on my desk from an anonymous “well-respected reviewer” to being first in line at my event with a stack of books for me to sign.
Kelly Bean, Kim Brock, Brittney Gabbard, Olivia Horrox, Alexa Marciano, Michael Link, and Cristin Stickles, for making the world a better place for book lovers.
The baristas at Kos Kaffe, for the endless supply of hot chocolate and buttered toast.
Lastly, I want to thank artists Darius Jones (Leon Reid IV) and Buddy Lembeck. Back in late 2000, I was driving on I-71 in Cincinnati, Ohio. At the time, I hadn’t quite recovered from a particularly bad breakup, and the world around me seemed very gray. I was listening to sad music and crying (a not unusual occurrence during that year) when I looked up to see a spray-painted message across an overpass: TONY DANZA IS MY DAD. It was weird and cryptic, and I immediately loved it. Over the next month, messages continued to mysteriously appear on highway overpasses, and each time, they jolted me out of my gray world into a place unexpectedly stranger and noticeably brighter. Thank you for inspiring Finn’s work and for surprising me out of my sadness.