"Say ‘cheese’ Alice," the Pillar demands. "The Mushroomers have no use for technology and smart phone cameras. They must've been here since long ago," he rolls his eyes.
I smile flatly at the Mushroomer taking the picture. As fast as a rabbit, he hops back to the writing desk and continues writing and cutting with his friend. He returns with a card in his hand and a drooling grin. It's a pretty smile, actually. Insane, but truly and outrageously happy. I am starting to envy the Mushroomers.
I’m not going to ask how the Pillar knows about my mirror phobias. I assume he knows more than I know about myself.
Seeing my face in the card is a better solution than looking in the mirror. I've never thought about it. I like the way I look. I have auburn hair, naturally wavy—or is it just an after-effect of too many shock therapies? I have light blue eyes, and a slightly edged face. You can tell I don’t eat much, I guess. My skin is fair, and I have an overall ordinary and familiar face. If I hadn’t been in an asylum, I could have been someone’s neighbor, girlfriend, or college girl in a small town.
But that's not what this card is about. When I read it, I discover it’s an Oxford University card. It has my name on it: Alice Pleasant Wonder. I am a freshman.
"It’s Pleasance, not Pleasant," I tell the Pillar.
"Pleasant is more pleasant," he says. "Besides, you're not an Oxford University student either. Don’t be picky when it comes to forging."
"You're right about that. I'm just silly," I note. "I haven't even finished high school."
"Oh, you have finished that," he laughs. "How many did she kill again?" He addresses the Mushroomers. They start jumping and clapping, and his fangirl grabs my hand and raises it, like a winner at a boxing match. "She finished all her schoolmates, didn’t she?” The Pillar is overly content with having mad people around him. It’s a totally different side of him that I don't think he shows to the world outside. “Now it's time to catch a killer, and save some lives." He rubs his hands together and walks back to his couch in the cell, and starts smoking his inverted mushroom-shaped pipe.
Chapter 16
The Pillar’s Cell, the Radcliffe Lunatic Asylum, Oxford
"Are you ready?" The Pillar says.
"I am not sure, for what?"
"It means you're ready. Shall we start?" He pushes a copy of Alice’s Adventures Under Ground toward me, as I stay right behind the bars. The copy isn't his. It's an old library edition, and it has a girl in a yellow dress on it.
“I always thought Alice wore blue,” I comment, picking up the book.
"False myth number one,” the Pillar says. “John Tenniel, who drew all of Lewis Carroll's paintings in the book, depicted Alice in a yellow dress in the first released version in 1865.”
“You're not serious, are you?”
“I am insanely serious. From now on, everything I say about Wonderland is dead serious, Alice."
"Why yellow?" I glance at the cover again.
“Yellow was considered the color of madness at the time,” the Pillar explains. "But let’s not get lost in such debatable details now," the Pillar says. "Flip through the book, and tell me what you see."
"A regular Alice in Wonderland paperback," I tilt my head, then flip through it. "It's a library copy. It has a British library's stamp on it."
"Good," he nods. "Where is the British library located?”
“In London?”
“Right. What else do you see?"
"Someone borrowed this book yesterday," I can see the date on the inlaid card. "I didn't know libraries write borrowing dates inside their books."
"They don't," the Pillar explains. "Someone wants us to know the date. What else do you see?"
"There is a map tucked between the pages. It's old, and it looks like it’s been drawn by hand. A map of Oxford University." I unfold it. "A place called Christ Church, to be exact. One location is circled in red," I stop and resist the peak in my pulse. The read circle has the face of a grinning cat on it. "Is the book another message from the Cheshire?"
"It is. What does it say under the cat with the grin in the map?" the Pillar doesn't waste time.
"It says: 'We're All Mad Here.’"
“Clichéd to the bone, isn’t it?” the Pillar smiles faintly.
"There is an arrow pointing to a location underneath. What is all that? I don’t understand."
"That's Cheshire the Cat's most recent message," the Pillar says. "He is playing with open cards now, knowing you and I are in the picture."
"Should we be looking for something where the arrow points?"
"Indeed," the Pillar puffs. "You're going to follow that trail today."
"I am? I thought it's my first day at college," I say.
"College sucks. First days, indeed. Saving lives doesn't."
"Who said anything about saving lives?" I inquire. “It’s just a map. I am assuming it leads to a treasure or something.”
"You’re wrong. This book was found in the hands of another dead girl this morning."