I couldn’t tell you when or even how but looking at Mikey tonight being in his arms I knew it, I felt it I was in love with him. I wasn’t just harboring a crush for him anymore I actually loved him. I wanted to throw up and not from the alcohol but because I allowed myself to fall in love with him so easily. I wondered if I had ever even had my guard up at all when it came to him. How could I not see that this was going to happen? How did I let it happen?
I groaned loudly smacking the palm of my hand to my forehead as we walked inside the house. I was such a moron. One day I’d learn to keep my heart under lock and key.
One day.
Just not today.
Or tomorrow.
Or the day after that.
“Are you okay? Do you need to throw up?” Mikey asked, sounding genuinely concerned.
“Yes.” I mumbled wishing I could throw up all over his shoes just because he had wiggled his sexy self into my heart.
“Yes, you’re okay or yes, you have to throw up?” He asked as he peered at me trying to decipher the answer to his question himself.
I looked at him for a moment before I shook my head as if I could shake my love for him away. Fat chance Nikki.
“I’m fine.” I said, turning around placing my clutch on the entryway table. I picked up his phone the home screen had an alert of missed calls and I wondered who could’ve called him while we were out.
“Right. You’re fine.” He paused. “For fuck’s sake, you’re not fine Nikki. I may not know much about woman, but when they say they’re fine that is usually a dead giveaway that they’re not.” He said his voice sounding annoyed which pissed me off and made me forget all about his damn phone. I dropped it back on the table and turned around to face him.
“I guess you don’t know much about women then because I’m fine.” I hissed stepping out of my shoes. I glanced around the quiet house anxiously trying to find a distraction from where this conversation was headed. “Are they home?”
He looked around the empty house. “No.” He shoved his hands into his pockets. “I doubt Aunt Gina will be home anytime soon if Burt got his hands on Chuck’s happy pills.”
“Happy pills?” I asked.
“Viagra.” He confirmed. My eyes widened and then I shuddered at the thought. “Yeah, he had big plans for her.” He said softly, glancing down at his feet.
I studied him closely, seeing the inner struggle he was fighting making me feel sorry for him. I had no right to be angry with him. It’s not like I had confessed my love for him and he shut me out. I just feared that if I told him how I felt he wouldn’t be able to love me back. I wasn’t even sure I could fault him for that maybe he was just incapable of loving anyone and not only me. He had been through a lot losing both his parents had to have some effect on him too bad it was his heart that was effected. I think I would’ve preferred if his dick were really broken and not have his heart be the casualty. I pondered that last part and shook my head. No, I definitely didn’t want his dick to be broken, it just sucked that his heart was defected.
“I’m sorry for acting like a bitch.” I said, taking a step closer to him.
“You weren’t being a bitch.” He said sighing. “I feel like there’s an elephant in the room that we’re trying to ignore.”
I definitely wasn’t in the mood to have this conversation to pour my heart out to have it ripped apart nope I’d pass. I glanced down at his crotch for a diversion.
“Is that what we’re calling it now?” I said, plastering a smile to my face as I wrapped my arms around his neck. I leaned in to kiss him, but he pulled back a fraction looking into my eyes as he spoke.
“Nikki…”
“Mikey, I don’t want to talk.” I said, swallowing the lump that was clogging my throat. I met his gaze with a pleading look. “Please.” I whispered.
He was quiet for a moment before he exhaled and gave me a slight nod.
“Okay.” He said softly and I waited for him to kiss me, but instead he bent his knees and lifted me into his arms. “No talking.” He promised.
I wrapped my arms around his neck as he carried me up the stairs to the guest room we had spent all our nights together. He placed me on my feet, his eyes bore into mine for a pause before his hands lifted to my shoulders and he turned me around so my back was to him. His fingertips brushed my hair over my shoulder, his soft touch sending goosebumps throughout my body as he pulled at the bow that tied my romper together.