She was delighted that the girl had recovered from her ordeals so well. At the moment, however, she rather missed the somewhat shy, meek Gay.
"Tis difficult to explain. I think I had finally accepted what I had, the way my marriage was. Now the fool wants to change everything and it makes me nervous."
"I think ye are afraid."
Ilsa started to vehemently deny that, then grimaced. "Mayhap I am, but I am nay sure of what or why. Every time I find a moment to think about it, to try and understand what is troubling me, there is Diarmot, kissing me, telling me sweet things, or giving me little gifts."
"Ah, how cruel and unthinking of him."
"There is a distinct lack of sympathy in ye for my confusion."
"Quite possibly. I am nay the one afflicted, so mayhap I cannae understand.
Howbeit, if ye think ye have to get away from the fool for a while, then get away ye shall. I am just nay sure why we had to be so secretive about it. Why didnae ye just tell him that ye wished to visit with your family for a wee while and leave with your brothers?"
"Because Diarmot would probably want to come with me and then I would have to try to find a reason why he couldnae, or why the children couldnae, or why--"
"I understand. Actually, this may be for the best. Ye really dinnae have any time to yourself, to think, and to sort out what ye feel and what ye want. First it was someone trying to kill ye and Diarmot, then there are all the children ye were given as a bridal gift, and there were all the troubles caused by his loss of memory and mistrust. Aye, mayhap a few days at the cottage with only your fourteen brothers and two score and then some cousins is just the quiet repose ye are needing."
"Just as I thought ye were understanding, ye slap me offside the head," Ilsa murmured, almost able to laugh at Gay's words. It was hard to ignore the humor of them no matter how she felt. "I may nay explain myself weel, but I do need this. I am certain it will clear my head."
"If Sigimor doesnae knock it off your shoulders when we catch up with him."
"Ah, weel, there is that possibility," she said and tried not to think of the coming confrontation with her brothers.
"But, why did she go away?" asked Odo.
Fraser sighed, understanding some of Ilsa's need to get away from Clachthrom and her husband for a little while, but not sure she could make it understandable to the children. "'Tis a woman thing, lad," she finally said and ignored Glenda's snort of amusement.
Ivy frowned. "Tis a woman thing? That makes no sense. I think we need to talk to Papa."
"Aye," agreed Odo. "He will ken what Mama is doing and where she went to do it. She probably told him."
"I doubt it," murmured Fraser as she watched Alice, Aulay, Ivy, Odo, Gregor, and Ewart leave the nursery.
"Are ye just going to let them go and ask the mon?" asked Glenda. "I think the laird is still asleep."
"Good." She smiled when Glenda laughed.
"I dinnae ken what the lass is thinking," admitted Glenda. "The laird has finally come to his senses and is wooing her and she runs away. Where is the sense in that?"
"I think she is afraid, Glenda. She loved him deeply when they handfasted, then found herself deserted, and when she comes here, what does she find? Anger, mistrust, and some madwoman trying to kill her. Mayhap her fear comes from holding out her heart all those months ago and having it so thoroughly stomped on. She kens it isnae all the laird's fault, but I doubt that lessened the hurt any."
"Nay, I doubt it did. Weel, then mayhap this is for the best. Mayhap those two need to cease tiptoeing about each other and have it out."
"Have it out?"
"Weel, do ye think that the laird is going to be all smiles and sweet words after he has chased her down?"
"Nay," said Fraser and frowned. "Yet, how is that supposed to help?"
"If the laird goes to her breathing fire and outraged male pride, our lady is going to spit right back at him. Somewhere in all that spitting the truth will out. One or the other of them will surely say something that makes it all clear and they can get on with being lovers again."
"I am nay sure if that makes any more sense to me than what Ilsa said."
"It will. Now let us just wait and see how loud the laird bellows."
"Ye find enjoyment in the strangest things, Glenda."
"Papa. Papa."
Diarmot grimaced as a small hand patted his cheek. He stretched out his hand, but Ilsa was not there. Since he could not toss whatever the problem was into her lap, he slowly opened his eyes. Odo looked especially sweet as he smiled and that made Diarmot very uneasy. He looked again and realized all six of his older children were standing around his bed, although Gregor was doing his best to pull himself up onto the bed.