The funeral was depressing, as most funerals were. And Katherine was by Benedict's side the entire time holding his hand, trying to give him strength.
The worst part, he thought as he squeezed her hand, was that Agatha and he had only just begun communicating.
He looked up at the dreary London sky. Was that the life he wanted for himself? To push away everyone and everything? His last remaining family member, save his cousin, was dead.
Alone. He was alone in the world, and he had nothing to show for it really. He had no true friends to turn to. Except Katherine.
He had to tell her. She had to know before they married how he felt, what he would give away for her, what he would do for her if just given the chance. If she could not accept his love and forgive him, he might just follow Agatha into the grave, not that she would much appreciate her devilish nephew ruining her chances of happiness in the afterlife.
He laughed at the thought.
"Are you well?" she asked as they paused in front of his carriage.
"I will be, very soon." He kissed her hands. She didn't pull away but the vulnerability was visible in her gaze. "Tonight." He kissed her forehead. "At the Kringle Ball, let us dance until midnight, and when all is over with, let us marry."
"At midnight?" Katherine laughed. "For what reason?"
"Well, I do have papers making it completely legal, as well as the old vicar from our family estate staying at one of my townhomes for the holidays."
"And my parents?" Katherine asked biting her lip.
"I hope they'll attend."
She nodded slowly, and then more enthusiastically. Her father joined her side. Benedict said his goodbyes and with a final glance toward his aunt's house, jumped into his carriage.
Katherine readied for the ball. A pink silk ball gown of beautiful satin hung snug around her middle. The skirts fell around her legs making it impossible to see the line of the dress. It was scandalous to say the least, only because she knew Benedict would spend most of his night trying to find the outline of her legs within the folds of the fabric.
The man did have an odd obsession with her knees and ankles.
Her carriage arrived at his townhome early, but he had asked permission from her parents to escort her, especially considering they were to be married at midnight.
She was so excited, she had to clench her hands to keep from waving them wildly in the air. His speech had been so beautiful, so wonderful.
Yet part of her, a tiny part, still had doubt, for how could a man who had lived his entire life one way, hope to change in just a few weeks? And all because of her? She was nothing special, she knew that. Even Benedict had pointed it out early on in their relationship, but perhaps she should just allow herself to fall. For the only person she could imagine that she wanted to catch her was the Duke of Banbury.
She knocked. A very stunned butler opened the door and then closed it in her face. Truly, Benedict needed to hire a new staff immediately.
She knocked again. He opened it a crack. "I'm here to see my fiancé. He's to be escorting me to the Kringle Ball."
"Er…" The butler looked behind him, and suddenly Katherine heard shouting.
She pushed past the butler with all the strength she could muster and ran directly into her worst nightmare. Maria, the old housekeeper wearing a gown fit for a courtesan with her chest nearly exposed. She was crying and shouting still. And then she turned to Katherine, venom in her eyes.
Benedict also turned. "This isn't what you think, she—"
"He loves to play games, my lady. This is just one of the many ones we've dreamt up together. It makes our time together so much better when there is the fear of getting caught. We fight," she laughed. "And then we make love, right after his innocent little girl walks through the door. I couldn't write a better story myself." She tripped on the hem of her gown and laughed again.
"Katherine…" Benedict pinched his nose. "She's drunk and angry, and somehow snuck through the servants' entrance. This is no game. She is ill, sick actually, and if she steps foot in my house one more time…" Benedict reached for Maria and grabbed her arm, clenching it tightly within his hand. "…I will have her arrested. Now leave before I call Bow Street."
She jerked her arm away, tears streaming down her face. "Why would you throw away something so good?"
"We are finished!" he yelled. "You mean nothing to me. What we did, meant nothing."
"It was everything."
He leveled her with a cold stare,"Perhaps for you. For me it was nothing but a heartless toss with an easy woman who desired money in exchange for services, and I'm—" He squared his shoulders. "I'm… sorry, but I'm no longer that man anymore, hell I don't know if I ever was."
Benedict sighed loudly, "Truthfully, I'm sorry I have caused you distress, but this," he glanced over at Katherine, "She, is my life."
Maria threw her head back and laughed, her dark hair spilling in waves across her scandalous dress. She walked past Katherine and glared. "You'll never be able to give him what I did. He'll grow tired of you and come back. Just wait and see."