Alanna pauses, gulping in air and wiping the tears from her face before continuing. “As soon as he was gone, I went back to the dealer and got what I could. I came straight to the hotel and told you that bullshit story about being recognized. It was surprisingly easy at first, lying to you. I was so used to lying to Mitchell to cover my tracks. But when I saw how concerned you were for me, and thought about everything that you had already done for me, the guilt set in. I had never felt more like a piece of shit in my life than I did in that moment.”
“After we ran, I knew what I had to do. What I wanted to do. Not only had I tried to sell my body for drugs, I sold out the only person I actually had in my corner. I was lost and depressed, and I knew I had hit rock bottom. I didn’t think there was ever any getting out of it. So when you left to get groceries, I took every pill I had. I knew it wouldn’t be fair to you, to find me dead like that, but I figured it would be better than if I left and did it somewhere else. You wouldn’t stop looking for me if I did that, and I was hoping that by the time you got back to the hotel, I would be dead. You could just pack up and leave without me burdening you anymore.”
It takes a moment for what Alanna just told me to sink in. She actually tried to kill herself. The thought is unbearable.
“My God, Alanna, I had no idea. I thought it was an accident. I never once felt like you were a burden on me.” I take a moment to control my own shaky voice. “In fact, just the opposite. You were the only person in the world I had to rely on. I… I don’t know what I would have done if you had died. I would have been devastated.”
Alanna shakes violently with sobs from my revelation, and I pull her into a hug. We stay like that for a long time before we both finally calm down.
“I understand you never meant to hurt me Alanna, and I forgive you. You aren’t a bad person, you were just struggling with things beyond your control at that point. Please, let’s just forget all of this. I want things to go back to the way they were.”
Alanna nods as I pull away slightly. “I do too,” she says. “I’ve been so worried about you. And Gabriel too. He loves you so much Victoria.”
My heart swells as I glance back through the glass windows to meet his eyes across the room. Always watching over me.
“I love him too.”
Chapter Nine
Victoria
I spend the rest of the evening surrounded by Gabriel and my friends. As I watch him laughing and smiling along with everyone else, I can’t help but notice how different he is these days. He’s a far cry from the angry, brooding man I first met. When he looks at me, I can see the intensity of his love, along with his ever-lingering concern. I love this man. And now I’m free to be with him. But what does that mean for us?
My wandering thoughts are interrupted when the last of our guests stand to leave. I hug Angelina and agree to have lunch with her the next day before sending her down in the elevator. Abel and Trevor both left earlier, and now Alanna is the only one that remains. She looks at Gabriel nervously as the three of us stand at his front door.
“What’s the matter?” I ask her.
She opens her mouth to speak, but Gabriel interjects. “Victoria,” he says softly. “Alanna was attacked in your apartment when Allan came for her. After she got out of the hospital, she couldn’t handle being there anymore.”
I give her a sympathetic glance, wondering where exactly they’re going with this.
“I’m sorry, Toto.” She nods. “But it’s true, it was too hard to stay there, so I had to move out.”
“Okay…” I nod. “But where are you living?”
“I moved in with Nathan,” she says. “He asked me to.”
“And we moved your stuff here,” Gabriel says. “I want you to stay with me.”
“Oh.” I take a quick glance around the apartment, feeling a little weird about the whole situation. “I don’t want to stay here because you feel obligated, Gabriel. I can find somewhere else.”
He furrows his brow and clutches my hand in his. “I don’t feel obligated. I love you, Victoria. I never want to let you go.”
Alanna grins stupidly at his sentiment, and I can’t help my own goofy smile. “We’ll figure this out later,” I say.
Alanna hugs me before making a quick exit, leaving me alone with Gabriel.
“Finally,” I murmur. “I have you all to myself.”
He smiles softly, but there is an unfamiliar emotion in his eyes. He doesn’t look happy, in fact, I would venture to guess that he looks a little sad. “I’m sorry baby,” he says. “I have to catch up on some work.”
“Oh.” I frown. “Okay.”
“It’s been a long day,” he says. “Why don’t you let me run you a bath and you can catch up on some sleep.”
“I’m not tired,” I protest. “All I did while I was away was sleep. I can wait up for you.”
Gabriel runs a weary hand through his hair and looks as though he’s in physical pain, but I can’t understand why. “I’m sorry Victoria, but I’m afraid I have a lot to do. I’ll be up very late. I’m meeting with some investors tomorrow for the new business, so I have to get this done.”