But as I think about it, there’s only one woman who comes to mind. Only one woman who can fulfill the need that I have at this moment. The woman with the haunted amber eyes. The woman I can’t get out of my fucking head.
I grab my leather jacket and head out the door before I can stop myself. I know it isn’t smart, going to her like this. It makes me look weak, and I don’t like that at all. But the part of me that isn’t thinking with my cock dares to hope she isn’t like the other soul-sucking vipers I’m accustomed to. She’s invaded all of my thoughts and broken down my walls already. I’m too soft with her. And if I’m wrong about her, she could destroy me.
***
As I stand outside her door, I think about what Parker would have told me to do. I smile at the thought. He would have loved her, and he would have told me I was being a fucking moron if I didn’t follow through.
I take a deep breath and knock, feeling more conflicted than I know what to do with. But when Victoria answers the door in her bathrobe, everything else disappears. She has some sort of goopy mask on her face, but she’s never looked more perfect than she does in this moment. Just being near her calms me, and the sudden realization of my feelings for her are like a sucker punch to the gut. I feel like the wind’s been knocked out of me when she looks up at me with those amber eyes.
“Hi, Gabriel,” she says softly. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until Wednesday. Is everything alright?”
The concern in her voice relaxes me a little since I still don’t really know what the hell I’m doing here. I lean down and kiss her on the forehead which only seems like the natural thing to do. “I know, I’m sorry. I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“No, don’t be ridiculous,” she says as she gestures me inside.
She glances back at her roommate, who is carefully pretending not to be paying any attention. “Let’s go in my room and we can talk.”
“Are you sure I’m not intruding?” I ask, feeling like I definitely am.
Again I wonder if I’m making a mistake. I should probably just leave now.
Victoria reaches over and grasps my hand in hers like a lifeline as she pulls me into her room. “You aren’t intruding Gabriel, don’t ever feel like that. I’m glad you’re here. I’m just embarrassed I look like a hot mess right now.”
I squeeze her hand and half smile while I look down at her. It takes everything I have not to throw her on her back right now and take her. “You look beautiful, no matter what you’re wearing. I don’t know what that stuff is on your face, but it smells… interesting.”
“It’s banana and honey.” She grins.
I nod, my thoughts becoming distant again.
“Gabriel…” She looks up, searching my eyes. “Are you alright?”
I lean in and hug her, inhaling as I brush my nose against her hair. I love her scent. So soft and feminine. So comforting. How is it possible that she can comfort me this way?
“I need you,” I whisper.
“Of course, Gabriel. I’m here for you.”
She still looks confused as if she isn’t quite sure what I mean. Her thumb strokes over my hand, sending all of the blood in my body south.
“Tonight,” I rasp. “I need you tonight. I just want to be inside of you, get lost inside of you.”
“Of course.” She nods gently. “Just let me go wash this stuff off my face, I’ll only be two minutes.” She gets up to leave and I pull her back. I’m being impatient, but I don’t care. I need to feel her now.
“No, don’t. I like you just the way you are right now.”
She grins back at me. “Come with me then, let’s take a shower. Wash the day off together.”
I hold her close for a minute before rising to my feet, never letting go of her hand. She turns on the shower to let the water heat up before moving to the mirror to wash her face off. I wrap my arms around her waist while she does, kissing her neck and breathing her in. She watches our reflection in the mirror, giving me a shy smile that makes my cock jerk in response.
As my gaze travels over her body, she closes her eyes and takes a shaky breath. I can’t understand why. She’s a beautiful woman, but she can’t even look at herself in the mirror. I’m so used to women who are completely narcissistic that Victoria is a mystery to me.
“Open your eyes,” I order. “I want you to see how beautiful you are right now.”
She clasps my arms tighter around her as she opens her eyes and takes me in. But when she looks at herself again, she cringes. “I… I can’t,” she says regretfully.
Anger boils up inside of me as I think about someone making her feel this way. But before I can speak she turns into me, searching for my mouth desperately. I know it’s a ploy, but I don’t give a damn as I untie her robe, sliding it off of her body.
“Who hurt you, Victoria?”
“What do you mean?” she asks nervously.
“I mean who the fuck made you feel this way about yourself. I want to know.”
She looks down at the ground, her eyes filling with unshed tears, and I instantly regret it. I pull her into my arms and stroke her hair, calming her.