“You’ve wanted to?” I repeat. Now I’m just lost and confused and feeling sicker than ever. “What the hell are you saying?”
“You want the honest truth?” I nod even though he can’t see me, and he lets his head hang low as he shakes it at the ground. “I’m saying that I’m fucking attracted to you, alright, Eden?” The moment the words escape his lips, he swivels his body back around, his eyes no longer gentle as storms grow within their depths. “And I know I shouldn’t be, because you’re my damn stepsister, but I just can’t help it. It’s stupid as hell and I know you don’t feel the same way, because you’re fucking apologizing for Saturday.” He pauses for a split second as he glances down at the ground. “I really wish you hadn’t said sorry for it. Because apologizing means regretting.”
I’m stunned into silence. Tyler, the guy who’s treated me like a doormat since the day I got here, is in fact attracted to me? It doesn’t make sense at all. “I thought you hated me,” I manage to reply, because it’s the only thing running through my head.
“I hate a lot of people,” he says gruffly, “but you’re not one of them. I hate the fact that you turn me on. Like, a lot.”
“Stop,” I say. I take a step back from him, shaking my head and holding up a hand. “You’re my stepbrother. You can’t say that.”
“Who makes up these bullshit rules, huh?” He viciously laughs, turning to look out the window before fixing his eyes back on me. “Three weeks ago I didn’t even know who you were. I don’t see you as a sister, okay? You’re just some girl I’ve met. How the hell is it fair to label us as siblings?”
Now I could really throw up. My mind is spinning, my thoughts drowning in questions. “You have a girlfriend,” I whisper. “Tiffani’s your girlfriend.”
“But I don’t want her to be!” he yells, and he’s quite clearly irritated that I’ve even mentioned her. He runs a hand back through his hair and pulls on the ends. “I don’t want to be with Tiffani, okay? Don’t you get that? She’s just another distraction.”
“What the hell is up with you and distractions?”
“Nothing,” he shouts. Exhaling, he presses his lips together and lowers his voice again. “I’ve said what I’ve needed to say, you know what I think of you, you’ve made it clear you think differently, I’m done. Enjoy the fucking fireworks.” He storms past me, both hands now in his hair, and the vein in his neck is clearly defined.
“Wait,” I say. Staring after him, I watch him pause in the dull hallway. But he doesn’t turn around. He only stands there, his shoulders rising in sync with his breathing. “You didn’t give me the chance to tell you that I find you interesting.”
Chapter 18
The strained silence that lasts for the longest of moments is interrupted by the sound of fireworks. The sky outside the window erupts into a vivid canvas of colors and swirls. Both Tyler and I tilt our heads to see, and the lights reflect off our skin, the side of his cheeks glowing a soft orange, which soon fades away as the colors drain from the sky. They are quickly replaced with more, but Tyler has already turned away from the window. Instead, he focuses on the color of my eyes rather than the color of the fireworks.
“Interesting?” he repeats, his voice dry. “That’s all you can say?”
The sky crackles and pops and hoots while the celebrating crowd below cheer, their tilted faces illuminated. The entire field is visible from up here, up in this out-of-bounds hallway. “We’re missing the fireworks,” I murmur weakly. I sound pathetic and I’m aware of it. Nothing will ease the frantic throbbing of my heart.
“I don’t care about the fireworks,” he snaps. His voice is low, but it rises as his bitter hostility toward me grows. “Are you fucking kidding me right now? Interesting?”
I don’t know why he’s so offended by the word. Interesting is good; interesting means different. I’ve never come across a person who has grabbed my interest like he has.
“Your walls,” I say, my voice wavering. I bite the inside of my cheek and gnaw at my mouth as I try to steady my tone, to compose myself so that I can muster up coherent sentences. “Your walls interest me.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he splutters, his Adam’s apple rising in his throat. Something shifts within the flashing of his eyes. He knows exactly what I’m talking about.
“I didn’t realize it until now,” I state quietly. With a soft shake of my head, my eyes drop to the floor and then back to his. “You’ve got walls up and they interest me.”