“Yeah, yeah, we will,” he mutters, then waves our parents away. He speeds up to get away from them, swiftly edging his body through the flow of people in front of us before he disappears.
“I know that Meghan is here,” I tell my dad, but my eyes are still focused ahead, searching for the back of Tyler’s head. “I’m gonna go find her.”
“Be careful,” he warns me, but then gives me the go-ahead with a curt nod.
I weave my body away from them, speed-walking in Tyler’s direction through the hallways of Culver City High School. I can hear the faint echo of a marching band in the distance, and it makes me feel as though I’m on my way to a high school football game. Which I kind of am.
The display is being held above the football field, and when I get to the back door of the school and spill outside with the crowd, there are already thousands of people in the stands and on the field. There are food stalls around the track, and the sun begins to set in the distance as the crowd thickens. There’s no way I’m finding Meghan.
All around me there are families and elderly couples and groups of college kids milling around, while others have chosen to set up chairs and blankets on the field to ensure they can watch the show in comfort. Whereas I’m now alone and wishing that I’d just stayed with my dad.
“I didn’t think you were the type to go off on your own,” a voice says beside me, loud over the noise of the band and the conversations around us. It’s Tyler, and he’s staring at me with a curious glint in his eyes and a small smile playing on his lips. “We can talk now.”
“Now?” I echo in disbelief. Out of all the places and times he could have chosen, he chooses the middle of the Fourth of July celebrations.
“I didn’t mean right here,” he murmurs, looking past me as he studies the field, the people, the stalls. “Come on.” He keeps his face low as he turns around and eases his way back in whatever direction he came from while I anxiously follow at his heels.
We’re heading away from the field and back toward the main school building, pushing our way there against the flow of people. My heart is in my stomach as we get back inside. I don’t know if he’s going to be furious with me or if he’ll be willing to accept my apology, and the thought of the former is making me feel as though I could throw up again.
I’m so preoccupied with nerves that I almost miss him take me down a hallway that clearly has a sign stating No Entry. Only certain hallways are open to allow the public to get onto the field; the rest of the school seems to be shut off. But Tyler disregards these rules, and I feel too nauseated to even bother arguing with him. We soon reach the end of the hallway that we’ve been sneaking along, and Tyler comes to a stop.
The noise from outside is barely noticeable now, and given that the lights in these hallways are all off, the only thing lighting up Tyler’s face is the dusk sun streaming in through the windows. I can see the field from here, but it’s not the field that I’m interested in. It’s the person in front of me.
He stares at the wall for a few moments before he turns to face me, all smugness gone from his expression. And thankfully, his eyes are gentle. He swallows. “What the hell happened on Saturday?”
“I don’t know,” I admit, my voice catching in the back of my throat as my stomach knots. “I’m sorry. You were just—you were annoying me and I didn’t want you to buy more drugs and I just—I just did it. I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry, okay? It’s really weird and it’s making me feel sick and we just need to pretend it didn’t happen.”
He stares at me as he runs his tongue across his lower lip. “I wish I could say the same about me.”
“What?” Now that I’ve blurted what I’ve needed to blurt, I feel slightly more at ease. That is, of course, until he looks at me in a way I’ve never seen him look at me before. And my entire body ignites again, just like it did on Saturday.
“I kissed you back,” he states bluntly. “I’m not going to apologize for that.”
“Why?”
For a short moment, his eyes smolder at me as he decides whether or not to answer. They’re soft and calm, yet his voice is sharp. “Because I knew exactly what I was doing.”
“Why did you do it?” My voice is almost a whisper as my heart hurls itself back and forth against my rib cage, creating a dull ache in my chest as the knot in my stomach grows tighter.
“Because I’ve wanted to do it so fucking badly,” he snaps. He spins his body around, turning his back to me as he heaves a sigh and presses a hand to the wall.