“I know, but…”
“You need to see me,” he said, cupping my cheek with his free hand and forcing me to look at him. “You aren’t scared of me. You’re not scared of being alone for the weekend. You’ve been alone with me plenty of times. You’re scared of the past, but those memories can’t hurt you.”
I looked into his dark eyes and knew he was right. The panic wasn’t about sex with Rafael, but sex period. I was thinking of how much it hurt with Playboy and his friends. Those memories had nothing to do with this day with Rafael. I had power now. Rafael loved me. How many times could he have pushed me to fuck him when I wasn’t ready? Dozens of times, but he waited. We weren’t ready for sex those nights.
We were now though.
Rafael held his hand out as I slid out of the SUV. We walked into the cabin with his arm wrapped around me.
“Cute,” he said, shutting the door. “Very countrified.”
“I like your backhanded compliments.”
Rafael leaned down and kissed me quickly. “I need to put away the food.”
As he gave me a chance to calm myself, I looked around the cabin’s large open family room and kitchen.
“Vaughn wants to build a second floor for the big brood him and Raven have planned.”
“Makes sense. This place won’t fit many people.”
I stared at Rafael's back as he organized the fridge with our food and drinks. Seeming so casual, I knew he was wearing his Average Joe mask. Nothing about him was average though. Yet letting down his guard scared him even more than it did me.
“I love you,” I said and he glanced at me over his shoulder. “Not just because you love me. I’d love you even if you thought I was nothing.”
“Would you stalk me like a lovesick puppy?” he teased, shutting the fridge. “Would you make a shrine to me in your room?”
“I’d plaster the walls with your pictures and touch myself while looking at them.”
His casual smile faded. “I have a shrine of you in here,” he whispered, tapping his head. “I’ve never needed anyone like I need you. If you left me, I’d follow. I’d kill any man you wanted. That way, you’d be desperate enough to come back to me.”
“That’s the craziest fucking thing I’ve ever heard,” I said, pulling off my shirt. “I better not run then. I’d hate for a bunch of innocent men to get slaughtered for checking out my ass.”
Turning around, I wiggled my ass at him. Rafael moved so quickly I didn’t realize he was behind me until he lifted me into his arms.
“I’m looking to play. If you can handle more, we’ll do more. If not, we’ll wait. Whatever we do, I need to hear you moan my name.”
“Oh, Bob,” I murmured.
Rafael carried me down the hall, looking for the bedroom. He grinned at my comment then lightly tossed me on the bed.
“When we’re married, you’ll be Mrs. Robertson.”
“You don’t want to marry me,” I said, kicking off my sandals. “I hate cooking and cleaning. I’m grumpy in the morning and evenings. I've been known to be grumpy in the afternoons too.”
“I know all that stuff,” he murmured, wiggling my shorts off my hips.
“No,” I grunted when he reached for my panties. “I want you to get naked first. You can finally strip down and stretch out.”
Rafael gave me a sly grin, causing my skin to break out in goosebumps. After setting his gun on the table, he removed his shirt then kicked off his tennis shoes and socks before finally shoving down his shorts and briefs in one swift movement.
Exhaling softly, I took in the awe-inspiring sight of so much flesh. My gaze lifted to meet his. He waited to see if my panic returned.
“You’re very pretty,” was all I could think to say.
Laughing, Rafael crawled over me and devoured my lips. I leaned back and relaxed under the weight of his strong body. Like a man starving, his kisses came fast and deep. I savored the addictive taste of him. When he pulled away his lips, I arched to find them again. Rafael only smiled.
“There is only you and me. No one exists outside this cabin. Not our families. Not our pasts. I don’t want you to think about the future either. Only see us right here and know we’re meant to be together.”
“I do.”
“You’re shaking.”
“I’m excited.”
Rafael smiled then rolled off me and lifted my body on top of his. Before I spoke, he pulled me down for a kiss. I met his need hungrily. Without thinking, I slid up and down so my nipples grazed the hairs on his chest. I heard my panties tear and Rafael's fingers tested my pussy.
“Are you wet?” he asked. “Are you ready for me?”
“Yes,” I moaned.
“Not even close,” he teased, tugging me upward and sucking a nipple into his mouth.