Damaged and the Outlaw (Damaged #4)

Giving her a head nod, I turned away and stared at my beer. In the mirror behind the bar, I saw how Harlow arrived with Tad Todds and a few of his other charity cases. They sat at a back table and ordered. I knew Harlow was watching me without even seeing her in the mirror. Like we shared a mental connection, I could feel her accusations.

My life in Tucson wasn’t a fairytale. It was ugly and rough, but it was better than I’d had in a long time. With the motorcycle club, I belonged somewhere. I had a family for the first time ever. My mom was safe and I found a level of respect. A good life even if I had to clean up the horrors left behind by my brothers. If I had cleaned up just one more, I could still be in that life. Hell, I’d probably be married to some pretty thing by then.

If I had done my job, I’d have the life I wanted. Thinking back to the night in that room with a drugged Harlow staring up at me and crying for her mommy, I knew I’d change nothing. She ruined my life, but someone had ruined hers first.

So my future wouldn’t involve a life in Tucson with a cute chick and a yard full of kids. Besides, Raven was better than those girls in Tucson. She understood me. Deep down inside, we were the same. I wasn’t sure why she was special, but I dug everything about her. Even when she was a pain in the ass like when she ditched me, I couldn’t imagine anyone better.

My dream kids deserved someone great and they certainly deserved a father who didn’t murder teenage girls. If those children ever became a reality, they needed what I never had growing up. A man who would take Harlow’s life wasn’t a man I wanted to see in the mirror.

Finishing my beer, I paid the tab and glanced over at Harlow. As I expected, she was watching me. Our eyes met again and she held my gaze. She was stronger now. Maybe she was really happy too. The Todds were good people and their love healed ugly wounds. Might even heal the horror of the night Harlow and I met.

As I left the bar, I accepted she was better off in Ellsberg. For the first time in a while, I thought I was better off too. Dead man walking or not, I had something to look forward to thanks to Raven. Tomorrow, I’d track her down and make things work again. She’d fight me a little then give in. Whatever happened afterwards would be a fun surprise.





Chapter Nine - Raven


Professor woke me up just after dawn by barking at Deputy Dickhead Darling who was walking up and down the street. I peeked out to find the idiot picking up trash from the street and throwing it into the yards of the litterbugs. When he took a big gulp cup and tossed it into our front yard, I considered raising hell since I knew the trash wasn’t ours. Instead, I decided to let the world sleep a bit longer before I started screaming.

By the time I washed up and sat on the porch, Dickhead had gone to work. I saw a few people preparing to do the same. Professor saw them too, but was only interested in the trash in his yard. He growled at the cup, pushing it around with his nose.

“Dogs are idiots,” I muttered as Pollack stared at me. “Bark at me and I’m barking back, bitch.”

The dog gave her equivalent of a hair toss then walked away. After I dug around in my purse for Nicorette, I grabbed a cigarette too. Chewing my gum while puffing on the unlit smoke, I tried to trick my brain into thinking I was getting my fix. It only worked because I was still half asleep.

“Lark will likely end up on bed rest in a month or two,” Aaron said at the doorway.

Startled, I nearly dropped my cigarette. “You’re like a cat,” I muttered. “I might need to get you a collar with a bell.”

He smiled and joined me on the swing. “Thanks for talking to her about asking for help. She needs to know not to take it all on herself.”

“Lark’s always taken care of herself. I tried, but I’m too selfish and disorganized. Our mother never cared. Lark isn’t used to relying on people.”

“She has me now.”

I snorted. “You sounded like a guy from a soap opera.”

“Shut up,” he muttered, giving me a grin. “Vaughn’s a good guy.”

“He’s a jackass. Hot and funny, but a jerk.”

“When I say good guy, I don’t mean nice. I just mean he takes care of those he’s loyal to.”

“Jackass.”

“He can’t commit because of the crap from his past. Not because he doesn’t have it in him. He wants a woman and a family. He’d toss his balls in your purse if he could, but he can’t so he acts like his balls need to run free in the world. Don’t let him fool you. It’s a con.”

“I’ve got his number.”

“Do you like to bowl?”

“Sure.”

“If you ever want to test him, ask Vaughn to go bowling. If he thinks you’re just some chick, he’ll say no. Bowling is this special thing to him. Not like pool or other stuff. If he doesn’t want to bowl with you, he doesn’t think you’re special. Sounds stupid, but the guy won’t bowl with anyone from our club except Judd and the Johanssons. He doesn’t trust the other guys and the bowling alley is like his church. He won’t share it with just anyone.”

Studying Aaron, I nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“If this thing with his old club gets handled, he’d have choices he doesn’t have now.”