Damaged and the Knight (Damaged #2)

“One more and we’ll have breakfast. I need to see Farah and…”

Judd’s finger tugged at a nipple and I forgot everything else. Maybe sensing this, he kissed me and didn’t stop until we were done.

All of the sex, including the shower fun, relaxed me to the point of making a nap look inviting. Instead, we walked downstairs where Cooper hid in the office while Farah sat out on the deck in the cool morning.

Judd poured me a cup of coffee then grabbed my jacket and slid it on me. “Sometimes, only one person will make things better.”

Giving Judd a soft kiss, I left him to join Farah outside. She glanced back at me when I opened the door. Looking tired, she only managed a weak smile before returning her gaze to the backyard finely dusted with frost.

Farah and I sat in silence for several minutes. She was fighting the memories, but our past showed up in her new life to taint everything. All these years, Farah used her walls to hide from the pain, but those walls were down because of Cooper. Nothing protected her anymore from remembering.

Nothing had ever protected me from the memories of that week. Somehow, my daily damage helped me deal with the pain of the night before. This was a new beginning for us, if we could face what we wished would disappear, but never could.

“I’m sorry,” I said softly, watching a squirrel make its way up a tree.

“For what, Tawny?” Farah asked in a hushed voice.

“When Travis would fuck me in front of you,” I said, causing Farah to tense immediately, “I would orgasm. I know it seemed like I liked it or him, but I didn’t. I’m sorry if it seemed like I didn’t care that he hurt you.”

Eyes moistening, Farah frowned. “I never thought you liked it.”

“They were always talking about how much I liked it though. How I’d come. They told Dad he could make a lot of money off me. I was ashamed for you to think that I wanted those fuckers, but I can see why you’d believe I was into it.”

“I never did,” Farah whispered, taking my hand. “I would never think that.”

“I really didn’t want to come. I hated him and I knew he hurt you. I would hear you screaming and I knew he was a monster. I shouldn’t have come. I would try not to, but I couldn’t control it.”

Moving closer, Farah wrapped an arm around me as I cried. “You did nothing wrong. I saw how scared you were and how much they hurt you. I always felt guilty for not protecting you.”

“How could you protect me?”

“I would think about that day when Mom ran away and I realized they were taking us. I kept thinking I should have fought them, so you could run away. I should have saved you.”

“I wouldn’t have run though,” I told her, wiping a tear from her cheek. “I wouldn’t have left you.”

“I know, but I still didn’t even think to protect you.”

“You did a lot. With Mom and Dad, there were times you got hit so I wouldn’t. I always knew you protected me when you could.”

Farah rocked me for a few minutes then sighed. “I hated how they passed you around. I felt guilty for how I mostly had to be with Travis, but you just got torn apart by them all. I should have told you years ago how you did nothing wrong. I shouldn’t have let you think I thought you wanted them.”

“We never talked about it.”

“We tried that one time.”

Nodding, I cuddled her tighter. “I saw how upset it made you and I made you stop talking. You were always so good at pretending to be normal and I wanted you to be able to pretend. I never could pretend very well.”

“Here with Cooper and Judd, we don’t have to pretend anymore. We have friends and a new family and we can stop lying.”

Nuzzling her hair, I forced a smile. “You made all of this happen, Farah. If you hadn’t come here and built a new life, I’d still be trapped with Dad or sold off to some bastards. Our lives would be trash, if you hadn’t gotten away and sent for me.”

Farah gave me a soft smile and I saw how much she needed to know I still looked up to her. How I still needed her.

“I never stopped believing we could have a good life. Sometimes, I felt like I was lying to myself, but I wouldn’t give up. We deserved to have what our parents stole from us. What those men stole from us. We can have it now.”

“Because of you.”

“And you. I might have fallen apart here, if I hadn’t known I had one person who loved the real me. I might never have let Cooper in, if not for you.”

“So we’re equally awesome then,” I said and Farah laughed in an exhausted way. “Did you sleep at all last night?”

“No. Coop was pissed and making plans and talking about how he wanted to kill those guys. I was mostly shocked that one of them would show up here.”