“I don’t have one anymore, Sway.” That’s as honest as I can be. I never had Maddox, as much as I had hoped during our time at the cabin. He’s the uncatchable.
“Oh, you sweet child. You have a happy, and as soon as you both let go of the bullshit, you’ll have that happy together.”
“You talk in riddles, you crazy man,” I laugh mirthlessly.
“I talk the truth. I’ve seen a lot of pain in my life, Emmy-Rose. I know another hurting soul when I see it, and that man is hurting. You don’t just forget that instantly. You’ve fought for him, and while I admire your strength, it’s time for you to let him fight to believe in you and that love . . . that happy.”
“Easier said than done.”
He smiles, his bright, white teeth almost glowing in the dim interior of his car. “Mark my words, he knows what he can have, and one day soon, you’re going to wonder what it’s like to breathe without that tall glass of hotness on your toes. I suspect you won’t wait much longer either.” He leans forward and kisses my forehead.
“I love you. You know that?”
“Of course I do, darlin.’ Everyone loves Sway,” he says with a laugh.
I climb out of the car and meet him around the back, grabbing my stuff from the trunk and placing it on the luggage cart. His arms are around me before I can even say thank you and goodbye.
“Chin up, buttercup,” he whispers in my ear, and I feel a rush of calming peace settle over me.
A few hours, one dead cell phone, and room service later, I’m ready to call it a night. I have plans to spend tomorrow figuring out where the hell I go now. Do I stick around, continue this tiring battle of the wills with Maddox? Or do I work on finding a new path—a path without Maddox and the family I love here?
I know I’m stupid to continue to find something worth fighting for in Maddox. He’s made it clear that he doesn’t want me—or better yet, that he does but he can’t, whatever that means. I might never get through to him, but I really feel like if I don’t try at least one more time—with everything I have in me—I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.
He needs someone to believe in him, and I’m guessing he’s never had that. He needs someone who never gives up on him, since I’m guessing that’s all he’s been used to the vast majority of his life.
He needs his ‘happy,’ as Sway calls it.
And I just hope it’s me.
I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow with the determination that I can do this. I just have to toughen up a little, chin up, and YOLO.
“That’s it, buttercup.”
CHAPTER 17
Maddox
What a fucking mess. I should have known that, the second I got my head out of my ass and allowed myself to believe a little in what I could have, she’d snap. She gives me everything I have been working to get since I started foolishly pushing her away.
The second she finished reaming my ass, that flickering flame of hope burst into an inferno.
She’s right; I hid behind playing some twisted matchmaker. Fixing my friends around me, all the while falling deeper into myself. I used their issues to distract them from me. I used each and every one of them to keep them out.
“Uh, where is your car, brother?” Greg snickers from behind me.
“Looks like he was too busy being a giant ass and it got swiped right from under him,” Asher laughs.
“Hilarious,” I say, not turning from where I’m looking at the space where my Charger should be parked. My lips twitch at the thought of my sweet little Emmy stealing my car.
“That’s what you get for pissing her off,” Axel laughs.
I shrug my shoulder, not willing to get into this with them. It really shouldn’t matter; all but Asher have seen me at my worst, so this is a walk in the park for them.
“Just out of curiosity, is this when we all take the advice you’ve been giving us for years now and give it back? Because hey, I’m not a chick, so I’m not really sure how these little special moments are supposed to go, but I’m willing to wing it.”
They all laugh when Beck chimes in. I turn and take in the four men standing in front of me, meeting each of their eyes to figure out what I’m supposed to say.
“Maddox Locke?” a little voice calls from behind the guys.
“Yeah, C-Man?” I should have known that Cohen, Greg and Melissa’s son, would find us out here. He’s been one of the guys ever since he went through some crazy shit a few years ago.
“I thought you were gonna bring Aunt Emmy home forever and ever.”
“Leave it to the kid to say what we’re all thinking.”