Cora slid the bowl out of the little one’s way and clasped her fingers, but her smile was still sad. “He’s long gone, Walker. I know you miss him. I know he was your best friend, but he ain’t here no more to hold you to your promise.”
“That was the point of it, honey. He knew he might never come home to watch over her again.” He held her hand another moment and then tightened his grip on it. “And I never would have met you if I hadn’t come here like Stephen asked.”
She released their hands and went back to her stew. “I gotta get away from this family before it gets worse. My mama will understand. She won’t leave, but she won’t mind my goin’.”
“It won’t get worse.”
“It will. When Miss Mari marries Mr. Dev, it will.”
“She’s not gonna marry him.” Funny how he said it with such certainty, when two days before he would have said the opposite and felt just as sure. But he’d seen the look in her eyes when she caught sight of that poster. The horror, the realization.
And this being Marietta, it wasn’t something she could forget. Not to say she hadn’t done a fine job of ignoring things in the past, but this was different.
Cora, however, had no reason to believe him. She shot him a look of utter incredulity and set about finishing her meal.
He let her. And he sent up a silent prayer that Marietta would make her way back to the stables soon to demand answers of him. Because he had a few questions to put to her too.
How long could one stay numb? Marietta moved the teacup from saucer to mouth and back down again and felt as though she were merely watching a play. Nothing that day had penetrated the fog inside her. From the time she’d pulled herself from the floor at dawn, a cloud had descended over her vision. Of all the memories branded into her, yesterday’s would remain the most vivid.
She had betrayed Lucien.
Dev was a monster.
Her grandfather was a spy.
And she had been charged with protecting a wolf. Though she was none too sure he wouldn’t turn around and snap at her if she tried.
Mama chatted on about the aid meeting yesterday, about the next one planned, about how sorry Daddy had been to miss her visit. Words, nothing but words.
“Marietta, sweetheart, are you feeling ill? You seem so distracted.”
“I’m sorry, Mama. I suppose I’m still a bit tired.” She dredged up a smile. “How long is Daddy here, do you know?”
“Just until tomorrow. More tea?”
She shook her head and cast her gaze out the window. If her father weren’t due back any minute, she would make her excuses and go home. Curl up on her bed and try to forget. If only she could pull a blanket over her mind. Obscure the past for just a moment.
“It’s good to see you out of second mourning already.” Her mother sipped and then lowered her cup. A dance of graceful movements. Yet her delicate brows were drawn. “Though I do hope you’ll not rush into another marriage. I know you are…fond…of Dev, but—”
“You needn’t worry about that. I think I…” Her mother’s gaze pierced. Too intent, too interested. Marietta set her saucer upon the table and toyed with the edge of the linen napkin. “I should have listened to you. I never should have had anything to do with Lucien.”
Mama chuckled and selected a piece of cake. As if all was right with the world. As if they hadn’t had fifty-seven different arguments about Lucien Hughes before she married him. “You were in love. Reason had no effect on you.”
“No, I wasn’t.” She had wanted to believe she was…but then, why hadn’t she ever been able to say the words to him? Part of her had known all along she wasn’t. “Was it just his money? His looks? Why was I so convinced I had to marry him?”
Her mother scooted her chair closer to Marietta’s, concern etching lines into her face. “Has something happened?”
She shrugged. “I never really mourned him, and now…now, when I decided to try, I wonder why I made the decisions I did. Decisions that sealed my future. And now with Dev…”
“You’ve no obligation to marry him, much as he may wish it.” Her mother’s fingers, familiar and warm, brushed away a curl from Marietta’s temple. “Do you want to come home? We can have your room ready in minutes. I would love it if you would. We could keep each other company. Worry for your father and uncles together.”
For the first time, that oft-repeated suggestion sounded tempting. If she didn’t have to face Dev every day, perhaps her heart would stop twisting. Perhaps the disgust and the echo of desire would stop waging war. She could break free. Start again as someone else, anyone else.
Except she couldn’t. She had promised Granddad she would help. And she owed it to him, to Stephen’s memory, to her whole family. Who knew what damage had been done through her, the Hugheses using her connections against the Union? All because of her choices.