He left with an even bigger smile, and I had butterflies in my stomach, but I couldn't tell if they were from nerves, excitement, or something else.
Bridgette raised an eyebrow as she sat on her neatly made bed, the dark blue quilt wrinkling under her. "Moving on to brother number two after brother number one rejected you?"
"No, and I'm never telling you anything ever again," I said, surveying my side of the room.
It was barren, with a twin bed that had seen better days. I unpacked my bedding first, making the bed up and stacking my books on the small bookshelf above my desk.
"Oh relax. I think it's good. Ash needs some competition so he realizes what he's losing in you. I wonder if somewhere in his mind he's connected you and Cat and that's why he's reaching out to her?"
I shook my head sadly. "I don't think so. He made a point of saying that we were very different. I think he likes her more."
"You do realize you are her, right? Whoever he likes, it's still you."
"Not really," I said, pulling out my clothes and hanging them in the narrow closet. "She's a role I'm playing, not the real me."
"Maybe with other clients, but not him."
"It's just confusing. I wonder if this is how Clark Kent felt when Lois Lane liked Superman more than him."
"Then just tell him the truth. Meet him like he wants, and tell him everything. Then he'll love all of you and you two can live happily ever after."
"Or he'll hate me and I'll never hear from him again, as Cat or Catelyn."
It didn't take long to unpack and realize how little room these dorms offered. By the end I was glad I didn't have more crap to unpack. On an impulse, while Bridgette had dragged me to the mall over the weekend, I'd picked up a poster of my own, and when everything was put away, I unrolled it and pinned it on the wall over my bed.
Bridgette looked up from her book, her long legs draped over her bed. "What's that?"
"Something to brighten my side."
She put the book down and walked over. "Is that Greece?"
"Yeah. I thought it was pretty."
She crossed her arms, staring at the expanse of brilliant blue sea with tall cliffs jutting over the water, houses built into the sides of the cliffs with winding roads that looked exciting and dangerous. "It's beautiful. I didn't know you were interested in Greece."
"I had a dream about it recently. It made me want to visit someday." With Ash.
***
A few hours later I left Bridgette to her book and went to Harvard Square for some coffee. Lucky had his kiosk up and ready to go and prepared a steaming hot coffee just the way I liked it when he saw me. "Here you go, Catelyn. Extra sugar and cream."
"Thanks, Lucky." I gave him cash and told him to keep the change.
"It's cold out today," he said. "What are you out here for?"
"I have an appointment with one of my professors. I'm hoping he has good news about some scholarships."
"Hey, that's great. Good luck." He shoved his hands in his pants and smiled a smile that always looked a little bit off center, like he wasn't used to making that expression.
My phone buzzed as I sipped the scalding drink, and when I saw the text I dropped my coffee, stepping away fast enough to avoid scalding myself.
Lucky ran around his stall and put a rough hand on my shoulder. "What happened? Are you okay?"
I read the words again. It's good to see you again, Catelyn. Are you enjoying your coffee? Now that you're back at school, we can have some fun. I heard Bradley died an untimely death. Seems people close to you tend to drop dead. If I were you I'd be worried about the friends you have left.
It wasn't signed, but I knew it was him. I looked around frantically, spinning in a circle to see if anyone looked suspicions. Too many students filled the area, and they all seemed completely normal. Some were texting, but none were paying attention to me.
"Lucky, did you see anyone following me when I came over here? Anyone at all who might have noticed me, or appeared out of place?"
He shook his head. "I didn't see no one. Sorry. Let me make you another coffee. It's on me."
He had it ready in moments and I held it close, for warmth and to ward off the unease I felt now. "Thanks, Lucky. Let me know if you do see anyone strange, okay?"
"Sure thing."
I arrived at Professor Cavin's office still shaking, but he wasn't there yet. His office had been left open, so I let myself in and perused his bookshelf, skimming my fingers over the books, many of which I had read or recognized, until I came to a familiar title and froze. Pulling it from the shelf, I flipped it open and stared at my mother's signature on the cover page. Made out "in deep affection" to "George". Professor Cavin walked in, and we stared at each other for a long moment, until I held the book up accusingly. "You never told me you knew my mother."
He sighed, and sat behind his desk. "It was a long time ago, Catelyn. Another life. She was my student once, beautiful and bright, just like you. It was before she met your father."