Suddenly he felt much as he did the day he left Riverdale all those years ago, helpless. He had to walk away from her then, and now he watched as she walked away from him. He followed her into the living room and didn’t say a word. She grabbed her purse. Deep inside, he hoped she would find the courage to stay, the courage he had never been able to find. He crossed his arms against his bare chest and watched as she stopped at the door. Her hand was on the doorknob, but stood still on the brass. He held his breath and waited for her to make a move.
Slowly she turned around. She felt as if there was a greater force pulling her back to him, a force she had never encountered before. She met his stare and wasn’t sure what to say. What was adequate enough for what she was feeling? She didn’t want to leave. She wanted to run into his arms and be the brave soul, she claimed to be. She wanted to risk it all and to hell with the consequences. Then she had a thought. What if she asked him about Seattle? What if she came straight out and asked him to stay? Would it matter? She bit her lip as she thought about whether or not she should really go that route.
“You don’t want to leave.” He said hoarsely, pulling her out of her train of thought.
“Did you want to leave when you left me?” She asked, her voice barely a whisper.
He wanted to say he didn’t leave her. That's what they were to each other back then was different compared to what had transpired between them now but that would be wrong. Because seven years ago, he felt the same pull he felt right now. It hadn’t diminished with time, if anything it grew stronger. He did leave her seven years ago, along with everything else he cared about.
“No.” He murmured. “I didn’t want to leave you.”
“But you did because you had to.”
“I came back because I wanted to.” And he hoped when she had time to process everything, she would too. “I’ll be here.” He promised.
She closed her eyes at his words. They were empty promises, God, how she wished they weren’t. She turned around and opened the door. Before she allowed herself to believe that he wouldn’t leave her again, she hurried out the door.
Nick stared at the door for a moment before he closed his eyes. How was it that he kept losing her? He shook his head and supposed he’d never know why.
Sam leaned her head against the door and cried. She was walking away to protect her heart from him, yet little did he know, he already owned it.
Chapter Fourteen
Two weeks later and Nick had successfully avoided Sam. He had been drowning in memories of her the whole time. The way her hair had smelled and the softness of her curves. He felt tortured by the memory her body and how it fit just right with his. When he closed his eyes at night he was haunted by her blue eyes and how they stared up at him as he made love to her. He pulled out a bar stool next to the one he found Luke occupying. They had decided to meet at Rudy’s for a few drinks.
Nick sat down and peered at his friend. Luke hadn’t even acknowledged that someone had sat beside him. He seemed to be too busy staring at the beer bottle he clutched in his hands. Nick cleared his throat and signaled for the bartender that was at the other end of the bar.
Luke glanced at him, a delayed reaction. “Hey.”
“Hey, yourself.” Nick responded. He may have been in a world of his own, consumed by the memories of Sam, but he wasn’t completely oblivious to his surroundings. Something had been off with Luke since his brother’s death. At first Nick didn’t pay much attention to it. For two reasons, the first being everyone grieved differently, and Nick expected Luke was grieving his brother. The second was that, well he had been too wrapped up in Sam to pay much attention to anything else lately. However, now, it was painfully obvious there was something else eating away at his best friend.
Luke tipped back his beer and took a hearty sip. The bartender made her way towards them and smile brightly at them.
“Well, isn’t this a blast from the past!” She exclaimed happily looking back and forth between Nick and Luke.
Nick raised an eyebrow and looked over at Luke, wondering if he knew who she was because he hadn’t the foggiest.
“It’s Nick Foti and Luke Lanza, right?!” She asked as she leaned over the bar. She stared at them as if her eyes were playing tricks on her.
Nick waited for Luke to say something. He usually had the memory of an elephant and if he couldn’t place the female in front of them, then there wasn’t a shot in hell Nick would ever remember the perky brunette’s name.
“Yes, it’s definitely us.” Luke said flatly as he took another swig of the beer.
“You two look exactly the same as you did in high school!” She said cheerfully and then let eyes linger on Nick for a moment.
Shit, he thought. How the hell was he supposed to remember her from high school? He offered her a smile, hoping to Christ, it charmed the shit out of her. “So do you.” He risked and then nodded towards the shelves of liquor behind her. “Do you mind grabbing me a drink, beautiful?”
Luke turned and faced Nick for the first time since their little friend had made her way over to them. Nick avoided eye contact with Luke. He could feel the laughter in his stare.