Rocco still didn’t answer. Mandy was walking her client up the mounting ramp. She took the crutches from him, then his friend helped him balance as he got on the horse. Angel was on the horse’s other side. Apparently Mandy had shown him what to do as a sidewalker, for he held his position while the vet got settled. Mandy set the crutches aside, then led the horse forward as she moved down the ramp.
For this exercise, she was leading the horse. They walked the circle of the corral. Mandy must have said something to the vet, for he straightened his posture and looked up, ahead of where they were walking. And he was smiling.
“Mind if I use your window?” Rocco asked Val without looking at him.
Val laughed. “Sure. Better yet, why don’t we go down there?”
“No.”
“It’s a big day for Mandy.”
“Yeah.” And wasn’t that the fuck of it? It was a huge day for her, and he’d already let her down. He couldn’t get that back, even if he went down now. He let the curtain drop, then leaned against the wall, watching the murky shapes through the sheers.
“What’s going on, Rocco?” Val asked.
“I wish I knew.” He looked over at the blond giant. “I thought this would end when I remembered the day I lost Zavi. And when I got him back, I thought it was over for good.” He made a face. “But I can’t shake it.” Val listened in silence. He didn’t reach out to him, didn’t offer useless suggestions. Made it easier to talk to him. “Kit wants me to see the shrink in town.”
“Maybe you should.”
Rocco lowered his gaze, staring at nothing. “She asked me to stand with her today. I said no.”
A heavy hand fell on his shoulder. He looked over at Val. “Maybe the worst thing isn’t wading through the black. Maybe it’s losing Mandy. How far you willing to go for her? Far enough to fix yourself?”
“I can’t even see the edges of it, Val. What if I’m not fixable?”
Val lifted one of the curtain panels. “You see that guy out there? He lost his legs. They’re gone. No way is he ever getting them back. But you know what? He’s learning a new normal.” He looked at Rocco. “Maybe this thing following you around is your new normal. Maybe it isn’t. Maybe it’ll end. Maybe it won’t. The shrink should be able to guide you through it. You know that. If you don’t want to see him, then talk to us. Talk to Mandy. You can’t cave in to it, Rocco. Not when you got all of us behind you.”
Rocco sighed. “There’s not a lot left of me, Val.”
“That’s okay. We’ll re-gen you like some freaky sci-fi project. Grow a new you—better, faster, stronger. We could inject your cells into a lab rat and see what happens.”
Rocco laughed. “I’d kill the rat. Or become it.” He pushed aside the curtain again and looked out. Maybe he already was the rat, leaving Mandy to her triumph alone as he had.
*
When the session ended, Mandy’s client was as wobbly-legged as a new foal…and happy as all get out. Angel and the guy’s friend bookended him down the mounting ramp.
“That was amazing. I’ve never been so happy to walk in circles. Well, I wasn’t walking. The horse was. But it felt like me. I felt free again. First time since this happened.” He looked at Mandy as she joined them. “I want to come every day.”
She shook her head. “Let’s work up to that. How about twice a week for a couple of weeks, then we’ll reevaluate? We can work up to a full trail ride, when you’re ready.”
“Yeah. I’m ready.” They chatted about his next visit, then both men shook hands with Mandy. “I’m going to tell them about this, the others at rehab. You’re going to be busy as all hell.”
Mandy kept her sigh to herself, thrilled with the work, yet saddened that it was needed. “I’m here to help. Bring a few of them out with you next time.”
Her client grinned. “Don’t think I won’t!”
Angel stood beside her as they watched their visitor’s car roll down the drive. “Thanks for your help, Angel.”
“Anytime.”
He looked at her as the silence stretched between them. Mandy wished she’d not let the silence speak for her.
“I’ll talk to Rocco,” he said quietly.
Mandy blinked and focused on breathing so she wouldn’t cry. “There’s no point. You can lead a horse to water, and all.”
Angel’s face was like stone as she moved past him to head back to the house.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Fiona was at the Swinging Monkey Tiki Bar in old town Fort Collins with her friends. The giant green stamp on her hand warned servers she was too young to drink. It didn’t matter. She was there as a DD anyway.
The bar was slammed, the jungle-beat music throbbing. It was hard to hear her friends. But she saw that something—or someone—had captured their attention. She looked to see what it was, and a familiar pair of deep brown eyes met hers. Her breath hitched in her chest. Kelan was here! He’d said he was going to come down and spend the night with her at their apartment.
The music switched to a different, quieter song. One of her friends slapped a five-dollar bill in the center of the table and announced, “Five bucks to the first of us who can get him to come join us.”
Fiona grinned. “Guys. Not a good idea—” It was too late. Her friend was already making a beeline for Kelan. Fiona watched, feeling a strange mixture of jealousy and worry. She hadn’t told them much about her summer, only that she’d met an amazing guy during her babysitting gig.
Kelan crossed his arms and glared down at her friend, saying nothing. Her friend stayed long enough to try to extricate herself without losing her composure. When she came back to the table, the next one made her attempt. This time she got a raised black eyebrow.
“Guys, stop this. Really—” Her words fell on deaf ears, drowned out by a new, louder tune. The third attempt made Kelan lift his gaze across the room and pin her with the blackest look she’d ever seen.
“My turn,” she announced before his patience broke.
Kelan saw Fiona approach him. The noise of the bar receded, drowned out by the sound of his thundering blood. His gaze narrowed on his woman, only her. Everything else in the room faded away.