“I’ll be fine,” she said stiffly.
“Right.” Cai’s eyes creased, the only sign of pain he showed before walking through to the lounge. Adrianna hobbled through afterward. Would she ever let him in?
Frazer didn’t move from my side. Instead, he leaned against the cabinets and stared at the floor where drops of blood lingered. I felt him preparing to say something. I had a sense I knew what. “If you’re going to try to make me feel better about abandoning him, don’t bother,” I said.
A grave, mournful look was my answer before he tugged me roughly into his arms. Shock was my initial reaction. As he continued to hold me, my pain spread through my body, pushing me to feel. My throat closed, but there were no tears to be spilled. No words to be said. So I pulled away, and we stared at each other—our mirror opposites. There, I saw my own fear and grief and determination reflected in every line and curve and shadow of my brother’s face.
The strings on my heart grew taut as I plucked one. Wilder.
“I am going to find him.”
“I know,” Frazer said instantly.
“But today—today we should run,” I said, hating every vile word that spilled over my tongue.
“Yes, siska,” he whispered.
That almost wrecked me. “Come on. Let’s grab our stuff before I lose it.”
We walked into the lounge together and turned our attention to the weapon racks. Surprisingly, Adrianna was the only one not seeking to swap her blade. She’d slumped in a chair by the hearth, wearing a fuzzy, vacant expression.
Frazer and I joined the others by the rack beside the window. I exchanged my blunt sword for another Utem?. Only this one had a black sheath with green engravings that reminded me of Wilder. That felt right—I wouldn’t forget my promise. Finding the balance and weight satisfactory, I slipped it into my belt and tightened the buckle.
Liora had chosen a slender, straight blade. Cai had gone with a longsword. After stowing the medical kit, Frazer picked out a dagger and Utem?. Adrianna was the last to the racks, selecting a long, thin double-edged blade; one side sharp, the other serrated. When she moved toward the bows, Frazer blocked her.
Adrianna hesitated. “We might need a second bow.”
“Yes, but bows are awkward to fly with and you’re not even fully healed. So I’ll be the one to carry it,” Frazer said, grabbing a quiver.
Adrianna backed off. A minor miracle.
With all this talk of bows, I marched into Wilder’s bedroom and snatched up the kaskan, clipping it to the full quiver and slinging it over my shoulder. I was about to turn, but a tether to the room—to him—prevented me. Leaving felt like a statement. Like a goodbye.
“Have we got everything?” I heard Adrianna say from the lounge.
Frazer answered. “I packed the quest items, but everything else we did days ago. We don’t even need to refill the water.”
We’d done that this morning. Wilder had thought of everything. Heaving a sigh that carried my guilt with it, I left the room and joined my pack.
All the bags were piled on the rug in front of the fireplace. There were six. Frazer had hoped …
I stared, rooted to the spot. “Should we leave Wilder’s rucksack here?”
A hush. “It’s up to you,” replied Frazer. “But he could end up back here and need his supplies. We don’t want to leave him with nothing.”
I nodded distantly and stole another minute by removing my gloves, and my tunic. The leather was already sticking to my undershirt, and would only slow me down. To my surprise, my pack followed my example. Adrianna had trouble maneuvering around her injured wing, but with Liora’s help, she managed it on the third try.
Every single loving instinct made me want to linger, but we were ready. No reason to delay, except—
A soft knocking on the door.
I bolted forward, but Frazer barred my way. “It might be Dimitri.”
I tried to push past. “Or it could be him.”
“Why would he knock?” he reasoned.
I deflated instantly. Of course, Wilder would’ve just walked in.
The knock on the door quickened to a pounding sound. “If you’re there, let me in!” It was Goldwyn.
Cai got to the door first and beckoned her in. It’d been a while since I’d seen her; the change in her appearance was striking. Cecile’s death had ravaged her—purple bruises stained her lower lids, her tanned skin had become sallow, and that golden halo of hair looked greasy. The only parts of her that stayed true to her warrior status were the black armor plates she wore, and the curved blade at her hip.
“What—” Liora began.
Goldwyn silenced her with a look. “I can see by the bags you’re planning on making a run for it. Considering what’s just happened, I don’t blame you. But if you want the chance to get Wilder back, I’m here to help.”
There was no trace of the gregarious female I’d come to know. Her face looked stern and utterly joyless.
“What d’you mean back?” Adrianna asked, her eyes tightening.
“Dimitri’s taken Wilder,” she said grimly.
My pulse screamed. Frazer grasped my elbow, supporting me, throwing waves of calm down our bond.
Goldwyn said in a rush, “If we hurry, we might be able to intervene. I’m not as good a tracker as Cecile … But she taught me enough. Obviously, I’d prefer it if I had backup. Dimitri’s a vicious bitch when he wants to be. I’ll go on my own, if necessary.”
I became a squalling sea breaking against jagged rocks. Leaning on Frazer, latching onto his strength, I made him my anchor.
“Won’t we lose them as soon as they’ve taken flight?” Cai asked.
Goldwyn replied as she swept up her hair and secured it with a band from her wrist. “My source says that Dimitri’s handing him over to a spider in the forest. After that, his orders are to come back here and take control of things. Apparently he’s obsessed with capturing you,” she finished, staring at me, her lips puckering.
“What source are you talking about?” Adrianna interrogated.
“Mikael,” Goldwyn said, cold disgust lining her voice. “He’s a traitor; one who just tried to kill me. But more about that later, unless you’ve decided not to come with me?”
I tried to be rational, but my heart was yelling my answer. I waited for someone to take the lead, to reply, but my pack just looked to me. They were giving me the choice. Surely that was a mistake.
I naturally gravitated to Frazer. His night-blue eyes swallowed me whole. “We’ll be okay,” he said.
He knew me too well. The only thing that had stopped me running out the door was a concern for him—for my friends. My eyes traveled to Cai. He may not have been the only natural-born leader in our pack, but he was the one I turned to.
Understanding and recognition crossed his face. He opened his mouth to pass judgment, but then his gaze flickered to Liora. In that one action, I knew he was torn.
Liora, straight-backed and resolute, said, “We’re going after Wilder.”
Decision made.
Cai started passing out bags. “Then we should hurry.”
Taking my rucksack from him, shifting my kaskan and quiver around, I secured it to my back. No one spoke as Goldwyn led us out.
A dead silence had descended over the camp. As Goldwyn sniffed out invisible signs and studied the grass underfoot, I caught glimpses of Bert and the surviving guards moving bodies from the arena. My only solace was that the murderous worms who’d killed so many, appeared to have been defeated.
We moved away from this sickening sight and left via the back gate. Goldwyn guided us up into the sun-drenched hills, skirting the silvery river at a jog. Now in the midst of summer, the water had lost its icy depths. We crossed where it ran ankle-deep.
Up and over the riverbank, we entered the forest’s wild expanse, leaving the bright blue sky behind. Goldwyn immediately ducked down to study the ground, breathing in deeply, but whatever she saw or smelled was lost on me.