“I’ve heard the term before. Some of the women in the office were talking about fetish clubs and Doms.” Her voice was just breathy enough that he was sure she’d been intrigued. It was up to him to get her even more curious.
“Ian belongs to one of those clubs,” Liam said. “And I belong to one back in the States. I’m a regular there, though I don’t have a full-time submissive. I play around. I train other Doms and some couples. I’m certified in Shibari and all forms of suspension play.”
Her eyes went round, and a sexy little smile lit her face. “Certified?”
It was time to make her comfortable. “Yes, certified. Safety is very important, and so is proper form and protocols. Especially when playing in public. In private, with someone I care about, it’s not so formal. It’s more intimate, and we can make up our own rules.”
He could see the pulse on her throat racing. Her breathing was a bit shallower than before.
“I don’t know, Lee. I’m not very experienced.”
“But you’re not a virgin, either.” He’d never prized virginity. He’d lost his own at the age of fifteen to a woman in his block of flats. He didn’t expect a woman to come to him without a little mileage of her own.
She looked down, her eyes darkening slightly. “That was a long time ago, and there hasn’t been anyone since.”
Fuck. Eve had told him she thought Avery hadn’t had many lovers, but she hadn’t had sex in ten years? He’d spent his twenties fucking his way across three continents, and she’d been a bloody nun. He found his role slipping a little. His curiosity about her wasn’t an act. It was real and visceral. “Why?”
Her head came back up, but there was a sadness in her eyes. “A lot of reasons.”
He let his arm tighten and pulled her close. He followed his instincts. He might be a son of a bitch, but he was a good Dom. A good Dom knew when a sub needed comfort. Fuck. What was wrong with him? He wasn’t a cuddler. Alex McKay was the Dom every sub ran to for cuddles and a shoulder to cry on. Liam was the Dom subs ran to for a good flogging and a meaningless fuck, but holding Avery felt so right. Her softness practically blanketed him. “You don’t have to tell me.”
She frowned for a minute and then her head found his shoulder, her hand lying across his chest. “I was in and out of hospitals for a long time after my accident. I guess I was in recovery for years. Not that people in hospitals don’t have sex. Seriously. They do. A lot. But I didn’t.”
He knew the story, but hearing it come from her somehow made it more real. “So you had surgery?”
“A bunch of them. I spent a couple of years in nursing homes.” She shuddered a little.
Nursing homes. Sad dank places that smelled like piss and shit and death. He couldn’t imagine her stuck in a bed, shoved away and forgotten. “Why the hell did they put you there?”
She settled in, hugging him closer as though physical contact made the story easier to tell. She hadn’t seemed to mind his gruff question. “I didn’t have anyone to take care of me. My parents were gone. My husband and, well, my husband died in the accident. I didn’t have siblings. I was alone, and I couldn’t take care of myself so insurance paid for a nursing home for a while. It wasn’t so bad.”
She was trying to calm him now, her hand brushing across his chest as though he was the one who needed the comfort. And he kind of did.
“Where were your husband’s parents? His family should have been yours after you married him.” Family should stick together. He didn’t have a family anymore, but if Rory had been married, he would have bloody well made sure his wife was taken care of.
“They were older when Brandon was born. He was their only child. They were devastated after Brandon and…well, they were wrecked after Brandon died. They came to see me, but they couldn’t take care of me. It was okay. It was good to have visitors every now and then.”
Someone as sweet as her should have had visitors every day, should have had someone in the world who would step up and take some fucking responsibility. He could already see she was a caregiver. Hell, she tried to help people she didn’t know. He couldn’t imagine she hadn’t done it all her life, so where were all the people she’d helped when she needed them? Where had her fucking aunt been? But she hadn’t told him about her aunt so he couldn’t call her on it. It was hard to keep straight what Lee knew and what Liam knew. “How long was it before you got out of the home?”