Still Waters

I was about to get up and go find something for her when Michael sat down next to me.

 

“Shouldn’t take too much longer. Don’t worry. Cyn’s got good taste.”

 

Behind us, the others were scattering into the mall. Dwight humped a pillar, making the others laugh.

 

Before I could stop myself, I asked the question. “Why’d you let him do that to her?” Thinking of the suck gesture, thinking of how Cyndra hadn’t noticed.

 

“Oh, so it’s like that, huh?”

 

Cyndra was right; his eyes didn’t smile when his mouth did.

 

“Like what?”

 

Michael held up a hand, like he was trying to keep me from interrupting, when I’d only said two words. “No, no. It’s a good thing. Knight in shining armor. I just never would have thought you’d be that way.”

 

“You’re full of it.” I turned back to the aquarium.

 

Michael crossed his arms and leaned back. “You don’t like that I let Dwight act up toward her. You think it’s wrong or disrespectful.”

 

I shrugged. But he stayed quiet, and quiet long enough that I felt the silence standing over me.

 

“I’m just saying,” I began, “that if I had a girlfriend, I wouldn’t let anyone treat her like that.”

 

I watched the black-and-white fish chase the others away.

 

“You don’t know jack about women, Iceman.” Michael stood up and grabbed my shoulders. I knocked his hands away.

 

“They like being treated that way. Especially her, man. Watch her. You’ll see. It’s a little game.”

 

Cyndra walked toward us, a big bag dangling from her skinny wrist. Her full lips pursed like she was on a runway and everyone was watching her go by.

 

Everyone was.

 

“Something you should learn about the world, Ice.” Michael’s voice was a reverential murmur conveying a profound truth. “There are two types of people: users and the used. The secret is to know which one you are and which one everyone else is. Which one she is.”

 

Michael’s lips curved as she hip-swayed closer.

 

I stood up.

 

Michael wrapped an arm around Cyndra, nuzzling into her neck. She leaned into it.

 

“We done?” I asked.

 

Michael turned his smile to me, just a curve of the mouth. “Almost. Gotta get you a cell phone.”

 

“Why?”

 

The scared kid ghost-flitted in his eyes. “Everyone should have a phone, Iceman. How will I let you know what’s going on without one?”

 

While he and the others went into the cell phone store, I darted into a gift shop and bought Janie a little stuffed poodle. It was black and growling, wearing a dippy rhinestone collar below a stupidly big head, and I thought it would make her laugh. Michael raised his eyebrows at the bag when I found them in the cell store.

 

He opened the phone box right there. Handed the phone to me, along with the booklet in four languages. Michael turned to the older man behind the counter.

 

“The problem with you people is you give too much crap,” he said, shoving the papers, the plastic wrap and shells, the empty box at him. The box thunked off the counter. The papers fell with the plastic.

 

The older man didn’t blink. Just stood in the wash of packaging and paper. “I couldn’t agree more.” Smooth, like he didn’t mind the piss raining on his head.

 

If I was him, I’d deck the little punk.

 

Dwight laughed. T-Man slapped his palm.

 

Cyndra winced at the salesman, then grabbed my arm. “Let’s go.” She led the way out the store.

 

In the mall, walking toward the exit, Michael sped up to catch us.

 

“See, Ice? What type of person was he?”

 

I ignored him.

 

“You’ll see,” he said.

 

At the Mustang, Cyndra climbed into the backseat. Once we were on the road, she pushed the department store bag over my shoulder.

 

“Okay, Ice, here’s the deal.”

 

I flipped down the visor. Cyndra waved a finger at me in the mirror.

 

“I got you a pair of jeans and two shirts, a hoodie, and that’s it. Wear the new stuff tomorrow. I think it’ll fit, but you need more, so just plan on coming out again Saturday. Bring Janie.”

 

I nodded like that was going to happen.

 

“Aren’t you getting a bit ahead of yourselves?” I asked.

 

Cyndra’s eyes narrowed in the mirror. “What do you mean?”

 

“I mean, what if I call it quits tomorrow? What if you decide you don’t need me anymore? What about all this money you’re prepared to spend on clothes, then?”

 

Cyndra shrugged. “You’re cute when you’re obtuse.” Her eyes locked on mine in the mirror. “Zap-zap!”

 

I looked away.

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Michael downshifted, taking the exit ramp too fast. “One: Cyndra’s stepdad doesn’t even blink at her credit card bills. Two: If it’s a big deal, we can take some clothes back. Three: I have to state the obvious—your clothes suck. So just take it, and if it keeps going, it keeps going.”

 

I shook my head, staring out the window as the buildings of downtown zipped past.

 

“What?” Michael asked.

 

I didn’t say anything because I knew that what I was thinking would sound pathetic.

 

Users and the used.

 

Money.

 

How it didn’t matter to any of them, but it mattered so much to me that I was selling little pieces of myself in order to get it.

 

I didn’t want to say all that. Didn’t want to say how I wished I had so much money that I didn’t need to worry about where it was coming from or going to.

 

And when the Mustang stopped in Lincoln Green, I thought if they had a brain between them, they’d be able to guess what I was thinking anyway.

 

I pulled the clothes out of the store bag and shoved them in my duffel along with the stuffed poodle. “See you tomorrow,” I said, popping the door open.