Girl Online

I sit back, stunned. “Oh wow.”

 

 

“You should read them, Pen, some of them are so moving. There’s one girl who says she’s going to stand up to the bully in her class and there’s another who’s going to confront her fear of dentists. And, oh my God, you have to read this one.” Elliot starts scrolling through the comments. “Look.” He turns the screen back to face me.

 

Hi Girl Online, my fear is a bit different to the others on here and, to be honest, I’ve never told anyone about it before. But if you’ve got the courage to face your fear after your car accident, then I feel like I ought to face up to my own fear too. My fear is my mum. Well, not exactly my mum herself . . . I’m afraid of her drinking. Ever since she lost her job she’s been drinking more and more and I hate what it does to her. It makes her really angry and moody and she always shouts at me. But that’s not what I’m most afraid of. I’m most afraid that she doesn’t love me anymore. That probably sounds really dumb but she seems so different—like she doesn’t care anymore, about anything or anyone, even me. But your blog post has inspired me to do something. Today, I’m going to tell my auntie how I’m feeling. I know she won’t be able to fix anything but she might be able to give me some advice, and just telling someone might help me to feel a bit better. Thank you so much for being so brave and for inspiring us to be brave too. Lots of love, Pegasus Girl xxx

 

I look at Elliot, my eyes filling with tears. “Oh my God.”

 

Elliot nods. “I know and look at this.” He scrolls right down to the bottom of the comments.

 

Hi again. Just wanted to let you know that I told my auntie and she was so lovely. She came over to see my mum and my auntie has asked us to both come and stay with her for a while. My mum didn’t get angry with me at all—she was really sad and she said how sorry she was and that she was going to get help. Thanks so much, Girl Online, you’re so right: sometimes you have to face up to your fears to realize that they aren’t actually real. Lots of love, Pegasus Girl xxx

 

Tears spill down onto my face. I wipe them away and stare at Elliot. “I can’t believe that—that something I wrote . . .”

 

“I know.” Elliot puts his arm around my shoulders. “I’m so proud of you, Ocean Strong.”

 

I snuggle into him. “Thanks, Elliot.”

 

He shakes his head and frowns at me. “Thanks, Waldorf Wild.”

 

I raise my eyebrows.

 

“It’s my new Sasha Fierce name.”

 

? ? ?

 

Nothing beats Dad’s “Saturday Breakfast,” but breakfast at the Waldorf definitely comes a very close second. After we’ve all feasted on crispy bacon, blueberry pancakes, and maple syrup all on the same plate (which might sound weird but actually works), Mum and I go up to the suite where the wedding’s going to be held while Dad and Elliot head out to do some sightseeing. Although I’m really flattered and excited to be asked to take some photos for Cindy and Jim, I can’t help feeling a little wistful. I hope I get the chance to go out later; I’m itching to see some more of New York.

 

As soon as we enter the wedding suite, I look at Mum and gasp. “Oh, Mum—it’s perfect.”

 

She nods and smiles. “I know.”

 

With the portraits on the walls and plush carpets and antique furniture, it looks just like the set from Downton Abbey.

 

Mum puts her To Have and to Hold planner down on a small table by the door and I instinctively turn my camera on. She’s put the planner right next to a beautiful antique table lamp, which seems to perfectly sum up the theme of the wedding. I zoom in close enough to pick up the lettering on the planner and take the picture.

 

“So, this is the room where they’re going to get married,” Mum says, gesturing at the rows of gilt-edged chairs that have been arranged in front of a grand fireplace. “Then after the ceremony the guests will be brought through to the dining room for the wedding breakfast.”

 

“Why’s it called a wedding breakfast??” I ask as I follow Mum toward a pair of huge doors on the other side of the room.

 

“I’m not exactly sure,” Mum says. “Maybe because it’s the first meal the couple have as husband and wife?”

 

I make a mental note to ask Elliot; he’s bound to know. “Oh wow!” The double doors open onto an even grander room, which is full of round tables. Huge old-fashioned chandeliers are suspended from the ceiling, with lights that look just like candles. Each table has a beautiful centerpiece woven from holly and white rosebuds. And at the far end of the room the long head table is trimmed with a border of sepia Union Jack bunting. It all looks really beautiful—and really British.

 

“Oh, Mum, it looks amazing!”

 

She looks at me hopefully. “Do you think so?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

“Hello! Hello! Well, this must be Miss Penny.”

 

I turn to see a woman coming through a small door at the end of the room. She’s wearing a polo neck and smart trousers and has her long grey hair tied up into a bun. She’s clearly in her sixties, and she’s striking-looking, with really high cheekbones and eyes as brown as conkers. Her lipstick is a beautiful shade of dark red against her porcelain skin.

 

“Hi, Sadie Lee,” Mum says. “Yes, this is Penny.”

 

“It is so lovely to meet you,” Sadie Lee says, giving me a twinkly-eyed smile. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

 

Before I can reply, she’s giving me a hug. She smells lovely—a really comforting mixture of soap and cinnamon.

 

“How did y’all sleep?” Sadie Lee asks in a husky Southern drawl, looking from Mum to me.

 

“Great,” I say.

 

But Mum shakes her head. “I’m afraid I was too nervous to get much sleep.”