“Now.”
He slides down, between my legs, loops fingers under cotton, and drags my panties off, lifting my legs and dropping a quick kiss on the underside of my thigh, his eyes catching mine, a smile tugging at his lips. “God, you don’t know how long I’ve thought about this.”
“How long?”
“Too long to admit it here. It’d ruin the moment.”
I smile. “Creepy?”
“Creepy.” He throws my panties to the side, running strong fingers slowly down the length of my legs, his breath hot as he takes a small nip of my skin, his teeth causing me to shiver. Then he spreads them, moving back up the length of my body, in between my legs, coming to a stop above me, his eyes on mine. “I love you.”
I study the thick lashes, his eyes behind them open and trusting. “You shouldn’t.”
He lowers his mouth, brushes against my lips, taking his time with the kiss, his tongue soft and suggestive. “I do.”
“I love you too.”
He sits back, his eyes on mine, loosening the tie of his pants, the green glow of his stare darkening, my breath inhaling in one soft gasp when he pushes down the material and his cock pops out. Hard. Ready. Our soft kisses and sweet words had done nothing to pause his arousal. “You ready?”
“You don’t have to be gentle.” My body is already broken, penetration an old game my body has played too many times to make this special.
But he ignores me, his fingers testing me, taking a slow swipe down my legs, taking a measured draw over my *, swearing at the moisture there. I myself am surprised, still, at my body’s reaction to the heat of his touch. How much my cunt responds, body arches, a moan slipping from me when he does the simple action of pushing a finger in. I can’t think of anything but how much I want his cock, its hard stiff bob sticking straight out, bumping against my sex occasionally, the dark need in his eyes telling me that he knows. Knows exactly where his cock is. Exactly how far it is from my wet need. I reach a fast hand down, wrapping my fingers around his shaft, his eyes closing at the contact, his hips thrusting forward, the organ shocking in its warmth, unbendable yet alive in my hand. A drop of clear liquid appears at his tip, and I run a hesitant thumb over it, my name dropping from his lips at the movement of my hand, my fingers, his own hands dragging my shirt up, making a slow tour of my skin, his eyes still closed, tightly. “Let me get a condom,” he rasps, pulling his hips away, opening his eyes, raw want in their depths.
I resist, holding firm to him, the movement of his body causing my hand to jack his cock. “Keep it like this.” I have had enough latex in my life. This is my first moment with a man, the first chance that my body will have to experience a real cock, this incredible beating organ that twitches in my hand at the words.
“No.” He shakes his head, his eyes on mine. “I can’t. You…”
I move my hand, savor the slide of it over his skin, savor the way his eyelids get heavy, his mouth drops slightly open. “You can.” I push his cock down, rolling the swollen head against my sex, the wet slide of me against him causing his hips to rock slightly forward, a groan dropping from his mouth as he lowers himself down, his mouth suddenly on my neck, teasing and tasting the skin there before moving to my ear, the heat and static of speech against my ear. “I don’t know if I will be able to control myself…”
I take over, the virgin leading the man, making the decision for him, my legs wrapping around him, my hand pushing his shaft slightly down and I pull with my feet, moving my arms around his neck.
“Fuck me, Jeremy. Right now, I need a loss of control.”
And there, my arms wrapped around his neck, his cock taking the first real thrust my body has ever known, I release the final strings of my own control. Let myself fully fall in love with this man. Let every push of him draw a little more of my vulnerability out. He cradles my head in his hands, his breath ragged against my neck and lips, his mouth stealing rough kisses in between breathless words of love, my name a gasp on his lips when he gives a complete thrust, going all the way in, the full connection one that makes my back arch, the feeling greater than any I have ever known, better than my kills, better than my freedom. This is all I need. This is stronger than my affliction, my dark needs. This is what is important. This love might be my salvation.
Don’t miss the next Deanna Madden novel
If You Dare
COMING FALL 2015
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
The creation of a book takes an army. I never realized that. I always thought authors sat alone in dignified places and created masterpieces. Now I know.
I know that I couldn’t write without my husband. Thank you for stepping in when I didn’t have time to breathe. For cooking and bringing me plates of food. For putting together a telescope in the middle of our living room without asking me a single question. For spending evenings alone because I am locked away writing. For dealing with the irritable monster that I become when I haven’t slept in two days. For lifting me into your arms and hugging me when a plot hole has brought me to tears. For letting me wake you up at two in the morning because writing my kill scene has caused me to be scared of the dark.