After Anna

‘Yes.’

‘So your conversation with your lawyer was twelve times as long as your conversation with the 911 dispatcher, isn’t that correct?’

‘Yes.’ Noah got the implication, and so did the jury. He could hear them shifting. He had to fight back.

‘And isn’t it true that you spent a minute and ten seconds on the phone trying to save Anna’s life and twelve minutes trying to save yourself?’

Noah’s mouth went dry. ‘I called my lawyer, and that’s how long we spoke. I was concerned for Anna the whole time and I was also concerned for myself. Both things can be true.’

‘Dr Alderman, after five minutes into that conversation, you weren’t doing any chest compressions for Anna, were you?’

‘No.’

‘Yet you were continuing the conversation with your lawyer about yourself, were you not?’

‘Yes.’

‘Dr Alderman, although the 911 dispatcher had offered to stay on the phone with you until the police arrived, you in fact stayed on the phone with your lawyer until the police arrived, isn’t that correct?’

‘Yes.’ Noah heard the jury shifting in their seats.

‘You didn’t call your wife after you hung up with 911, did you?’

‘No.’

Linda frowned, telegraphing disapproval. ‘So you did not call your own wife, the mother of this child, to tell her that you had found her only daughter dead on your porch?’

‘No.’

‘Isn’t it true that you didn’t call her because you couldn’t face her?’

‘No.’ Noah felt the pressure to answer building inside him. Maggie would want the answer.

‘Dr Alderman, isn’t it true that you didn’t call her because you knew that your wife, the woman who knows you best, would know that you had killed her daughter?’

‘No, I didn’t call her because I knew she wouldn’t answer. She wasn’t taking my calls.’

‘But you called her from the car after you left the gym, did you not?’

‘Oh. Yes, I did.’ Noah had forgotten he did that. It was a habit. Maggie always left work before he did. He always called her on the way home. It had been when he missed Maggie the most, the in-between times, the interstices of his life that she filled in, connecting everything. He had never known that until he’d lost her. And then it was too late.

‘So you called her after the gym, knowing that she wouldn’t take the call, yet later, holding her precious daughter dead in your arms, you didn’t call her?’

Noah didn’t know what to say. He knew Maggie would be listening to every word. He couldn’t see her face. He knew what it would look like. Devastated.

‘Dr Alderman?’

‘I forget the question,’ Noah blurted out, and there was shifting in the jury box behind him, but he didn’t dare look over. He knew what their expressions would look like too. Distant. Incredulous. Furious.

‘Isn’t it true that you didn’t call your wife because you wanted to call your criminal lawyer?’

‘No.’

‘But as you testified, you were worried that you were going to be suspected of Anna’s murder, weren’t you?’

‘Okay, yes, I was.’ Noah was confusing himself, his mind on Maggie. The gallery. The jury. The judge.

‘Dr Alderman, isn’t it true that when the police came, you declined to answer any questions?’

Thomas rose. ‘Objection, Your Honor. The jury is not permitted to draw any adverse inference regarding Dr Alderman’s exercise of his constitutional rights.’

Judge Gardner nodded. ‘Sustained.’

Thomas rose. ‘Your Honor, this cross-examination has gone on quite some time. May I request a brief break, Your Honor?’

Linda frowned. ‘Your Honor, I don’t think that’s necessary.’

‘I do, Ms Swain-Pettit.’ Judge Gardner reached for the gavel. ‘We’ll recess for fifteen minutes, ladies and gentlemen.’

Noah breathed a relieved sigh, avoiding Linda’s eye. He was looking for Maggie.





Chapter Twenty-six


Maggie, Before

‘So this will be fun!’ Maggie cruised down the street with Anna, seeing her neighbors inside their houses, the kids hunkering down to homework in the family room and the parents getting ready for the work week, fighting off the Sunday night gloom. She knew that feeling, but she didn’t have it tonight. Everything felt like a new experience, with Anna.

‘Agree!’ Anna smiled.

‘And King of Prussia is a great mall. It has every store imaginable. J. Crew, Abercrombie, Free People, Nordstrom.’ Maggie left out Neiman Marcus, since that may have been in Anna’s price bracket, but not her and Noah’s.

‘There’s a pop-up store there, too. I saw it online. It’s called Circa. It sells really cool stuff, like vintage. Boho.’

‘Okay, sounds great.’ Maggie felt suddenly cool and hip. Pop-up stores. Mall trips. Girly fun. She wasn’t an odd duck anymore, with a secret daughter. She was a full-blown mom.

‘And I want to pay for this, okay?’ Anna looked over, her ponytail swinging. ‘These are my expenses. James approves them. I never even spend that much.’

‘I know, but let me treat you tonight.’ Maggie turned onto Montgomery Avenue, taking the back roads.

‘Then let’s split it, okay?’

‘Okay.’ Maggie wondered if Noah would agree. ‘You know, Noah and I were talking about house rules, and how to make rules for you.’

‘Rules?’ Anna looked over, blinking.

‘Nothing too onerous. We’re not really strict with Caleb. But we should probably have some rules for both of you.’

‘Okay,’ Anna said, slowly enough to make Maggie wonder if she was pushing the point.

‘I don’t want to make a big thing of it. I’m just thinking that with respect to purchases, whether it’s the clothes or the car, we might discuss those things as a family.’

‘If you want to, I will.’ Anna shrugged. ‘You’re right, you guys should make the rules and I’ll follow them. I followed the rules at Congreve.’

‘What rules did they have? Curfews?’

‘Yes, but I never went out. I don’t think following a curfew is going to be a problem here, either.’ Anna shot her a sideways glance. ‘It’s not like my social calendar is going to be crazy busy.’

‘I know you’ll make friends, and like my mother used to tell me, “it only takes one.” ’ Maggie hadn’t remembered it until this very moment.

‘Did you have a lot of friends, growing up?’

‘Yes, I did, but it wasn’t easy. I was insecure.’ Maggie realized she had stumbled onto something. Maybe a way to get Anna to talk about herself was to be open about her past. ‘I used to be fat. My dad always said “pleasingly plump,” and in an Italian family, plump is always pleasing. I never thought it was a bad thing until I got to school. I got bullied and called names.’

‘Fat-shaming.’

‘Right.’ Maggie stopped at a traffic light, the red burning into the increasing darkness. ‘So I felt shy, but there was one girl in my Latin class and we became best friends.’

‘So it only took one.’

‘Yes, but it’s not like I had a lot of dates.’ Maggie felt a twinge, surprised she carried the dumb high-school hurts, even now. She was fifty-two pounds lighter, but a fat kid inside. ‘I got asked to the senior prom by a guy I liked, and his friends called him a chubby chaser.’

‘That’s so mean!’

‘I know, and he was a great guy.’

‘It’ll be strange to go to school with boys,’ Anna said, after a moment.

‘You didn’t have a boyfriend at Congreve, did you?’ Maggie asked, trying to keep her tone casual. She was asking for Noah.

‘No.’

‘You could meet a guy this week who could ask you out. Or you could even ask him out.’

Anna waved her off. ‘No one will ask me out.’

‘You don’t know that. You’re beautiful and smart and any guy would be lucky to date you.’ Maggie steered through the night, heading toward Route 202. ‘And if a guy happens to ask you out, and you like him, you should say yes. You could have a date this weekend.’

‘You think?’ Anna squealed, which made Maggie laugh.

‘Of course! You’re assuming things will go badly. Why not assume that they’ll go well?’