74
2345
• Silo 1 •
IT TOOK A few days of planning and building up the nerve for Donald to make the request, and a few days more for Dr Wilson to schedule an appointment. During that time he told Eren about his suspicions of silo forty’s involvement. The flurry of activity launched by this simple guess quickly consumed the silo. Donald signed off on a requisition for a bombing run, even though he didn’t quite understand what he was signing. Little-used levels of the silo – levels familiar to Donald from before – were reawakened. Days later, he didn’t feel the rumble or the ground shake, but others claimed to have. All he found was that a new layer of dust had settled over his things, shaken loose from the ceiling.
The day of his meeting with Dr Wilson, he stole down to the main cryopod floor to test his code. He still didn’t fully trust the disguise offered by his loose overalls and the badge with someone else’s name on it. Just the day before, he had seen someone in the gym he thought he recognised from his first shift. It put him in the habit of slinking instead of strutting. And so he shuffled down the hall of frozen bodies and entered his code into the keypad warily. He expected red lights and warning buzzes. Instead, the light above the Emergency Personnel label flashed green, and the lock clanked. Donald glanced down the hall to see if anyone was watching as he pulled the door open and slipped inside.
The little-used cryochamber was a fraction of the size of the others and only one level deep. Standing inside the door, Donald could picture how the main deep freeze wrapped around this much smaller room. This was a mere bump along great walls that stretched nearly out of sight. And yet it contained something far more precious. To him, anyway.
He picked his way through the pods and peeked in at the frozen faces. It was difficult to remember being there with Thurman on his previous shift, hard to recall the exact spot, but he eventually found her. He checked the small screen and remembered thinking it didn’t matter what her name was, saw that there wasn’t one assigned. Just a number.
‘Hey, sis.’
His fingertips sang against the glass as he rubbed the frost away. He recalled their parents with sadness. He wondered how much Charlotte knew of this place and Thurman’s plans before she came here. He hoped nothing. He liked to think her less culpable than him.
Seeing her brought back memories of her visit to DC. She had wasted a precious furlough on campaigning for Thurman and seeing her brother. Charlotte had given him a hard time when she found out he’d lived in DC for two years and hadn’t been to any of the museums. It didn’t matter how busy he was, she’d said. It was unforgivable. ‘They’re free,’ she told him, as if that were reason enough.
So they had gone to the Air and Space Museum together. Donald remembered waiting to get in. He remembered a scale model of the solar system on the sidewalk outside the museum entrance. Although the inner planets were located just a few strides apart, Pluto was blocks away, down past the Hirshhorn Museum, impossibly distant. Now, as he gazed at his sister’s frozen form, that day in his memory felt the same way. Impossibly distant. A tiny dot.
Later that afternoon, she had dragged him to the Holocaust Museum. Donald had been avoiding going since moving to Washington. Maybe it was the reason he avoided the National Mall altogether. Everyone told him it was something he had to see. ‘You must go,’ they’d say. ‘It’s important.’ They used words like ‘powerful’ and ‘haunting’. They said it would change his life. They said this – but their eyes warned him.
His sister had pulled him up the steps, his heart heavy with dread. The building had been constructed as a reminder, but Donald didn’t want to be reminded. He was on his meds by then to help him forget what he was reading in the Order, to keep him from feeling as though the world might end at any moment. Such barbarisms as that building contained were buried in the past, he’d told himself, never to be unearthed or repeated.
There had been remnants of the museum’s sixtieth anniversary still hanging, sombre signs and banners. A new wing had been installed, cords and stakes holding up fledgling trees and the air scented with mulch. He remembered seeing a group of tourists file out, dabbing at their eyes and shielding themselves from the sun. He had wanted to turn and run, but his sister had held his hand and the man at the ticket booth had already smiled at him. At least it’d been late in the day, so they couldn’t stay long.
Donald rested his hands on the coffin-like pod and remembered the visit. There had been scenes of torture and starvation. A room full of shoes beyond counting. Walls displayed images of naked bodies folded together, lifeless eyes wide open, ribs and genitals exposed, as mounds of people tumbled into a pit, into a hole scooped out of the earth. Donald couldn’t bear to look at it. He had tried to focus on the bulldozer instead, to look at the man driving the machine, that serene face, a cigarette between pursed lips, a look of steady concentration. A job. There was no solace to be found anywhere in that scene. The man driving the bulldozer was the most horrific part.
Donald had shrunk away from those grisly exhibits, losing his sister in the darkness. Here was a museum of horrors never to be repeated. Mass burials performed with the opposite of ceremony, with complete apathy. People calmly marched into showers.
He had sought refuge in a new exhibit called Architects of Death, drawn to the blueprints, to the promise of the familiar and the ordered. He’d found instead a claustrophobic space wallpapered with schematics of slaughter. That exhibit had been no easier to stomach. There was a wall explaining the movement to deny the Holocaust, even after it had happened.
The array of blueprints had been shown as evidence. That was the purpose of the room. Blueprints that had survived the frantic burnings and purges as the Russians closed in, Himmler’s signature on many of them. The layout of Auschwitz, the gas chambers, everything clearly labelled. Donald had hoped the plans would give him relief from what he saw elsewhere in the museum, but then he had learned that Jewish draughtsmen had been forced to contribute. Their pens had inked in the very walls around them. They had been coerced into sketching the home of their future abuse.
Donald remembered fumbling for a bottle of pills as the small room spun around him. He remembered wondering how those people could have gone along with it, could have seen what they were drawing and not known. How could they not know, not see what it was for?
Blinking tears away, he noticed where he was standing. The pods in their neat rows were alien to him, but the walls and floor and ceiling were familiar enough. Donald had helped to design this place. It was here because of him. And when he’d tried to get out, to escape, they had brought him back screaming and kicking, a prisoner behind his own walls.
The beeping of the keypad outside chased away these disturbing thoughts. Donald turned as the great slab of steel hinged inward on pins the size of a man’s arms. Dr Wilson, the shift doctor, stepped inside. He spotted Donald and frowned. ‘Sir?’ he called out.
Donald could feel a trickle of sweat work its way down his temple. His heart continued to race from the memory of the exhibition. He felt warm, despite being able to see his breath puff out before him.
‘Did you forget about our appointment?’ Dr Wilson asked.
Donald wiped his forehead and rubbed his palm on the seat of his pants. ‘No, no,’ he said, fighting to keep the shakiness out of his voice. ‘I just lost track of time.’
Dr Wilson nodded. ‘I saw you on my monitor and figured that was it.’ He glanced at the pod nearest to Donald and frowned. ‘Someone you know?’
‘Hm? No.’ Donald removed his hand, which had grown cold against the pod. ‘Someone I worked with.’
‘Well, are you ready?’
‘Yes,’ Donald said. ‘I appreciate the refresher. It’s been a while since I’ve gone over the protocols.’
Dr Wilson smiled. ‘Of course. I’ve got you lined up with the new reactor tech coming on to his fourth shift. We’re just waiting on you.’ He gestured towards the hall.
Donald patted his sister’s pod and smiled. She had waited hundreds of years. Another day or two wouldn’t hurt. And then they would see what exactly he had helped to build. The two of them would find out together.